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Conditions at Seddon were perfect for our first encounter with the Lane Xang boys since both teams won promotion last season. Today it was top against bottom in the 4th Division. They gave us two tough games last season, and our pre match discussion focused on how good these guys are at attacking right from the off. We weren't disappointed, Lang Xang attacked in numbers and but for a bit of wayward shooting, they would have taken the lead.

Against the run of play OC’s broke down the right, Olly crossed to the far post, Gibbo controlled it and cooly despatched it. 1-0. This did little to thwart the LX boys attacking game and OC's were finding it hard to hold on to the ball. At last, 20 mins in and once more from the right Olly looked up and saw Gibbo coming in again from the left wing. A pinpoint cross was deftly controlled and finished by the rampant Brummy. 2-0. OC’s began to take control at this stage and the football that we are capable of resulted in some good efforts on goal. A third goal was on the cards and again it was Gibbo that didn’t disappoint. Having lost his marker, he was spotted by Ash who delivered an excellent ball. Gibbo saved the best till last, with a half volley that no one was going to stop, to complete his hatrick with only 30 minutes gone. He could have left the park at this stage as he already had MOTM wrapped up. 3-0. While our confidence was now growing LX's was waning. With 5 minutes left in the half OC's were awarded a free kick just inside the LX half. Dan picks it up, and with his coach (me) screaming to take his time. Dan puts it down, quick as a flash he passes straight through the LX back line for Ash to have a clear run at goal and neatly finish for number 4 (it pays to ignore the coach). Halftime - 4-0.

We had taken these leads before and then stopped playing, so we were determined to keep working in the second half, with no let up. We didn't have to wait long; eight minutes in and Dave (who had come on for Olly) made his first contribution with an excellent pass to Gibbo who in turn passed to Dan who made it 5-0. Not long after Dave was involved again with a headed ball through the defence for Dan to latch on to and score his second and OC's 6th. A top performance from the boy upfront. 6-0.

Throughout, LX had never given up and kept the OC’s defence on their toes. One such attack saw some gritty determination in the box that resulted in a good shout for a pen. The ref pointed to the spot, and although Matt guessed correctly, the pen was a good one and LX found themselves on the score sheet. 6-1.

With 20 mins remaining the gaffer sent Bugsy and Alex "Alfie" Bell on; Bugsy on the right and Alfie on the left. It was well over a year since Alfie had donned the black and red and he was chuffed to be back. He was like a dog with two appendages 10 mins later, when he got in at the far post to finish off an excellent ball from Ash to make it 7-1. OC’s were dominating at this stage and the hard work in training was evident as the boys kept attacking right till the end. Gussy who captained the team with gusto had earlier missed a chance from 3 inches out with only two blades of grass to beat. The LX keeper must have felt sorry for him, because he was to let a soft strike from the Captain through his legs for number eight. 8-1. With 5 mins left on the clock another marauding run from Tom on the right, some good inter play with Bugsy, Tom delivered a perfect ball to Alfie. The comeback kid made it look easy with a well-controlled take and finish... welcome back Alfie. 9-1, and the final whistle was blown.

Although this was OC's biggest win of the season, we were all agreed that the LX boys gave us the hardest start to any game and were very unlucky not to have grabbed a few more goals, with strikes rattling both the bar and post. Their position in the league belies their efforts and talent and with a couple of stout defenders they should climb off the bottom soon. Thanks Lane Xang and best of luck for the remainder of the season.

The Coach

Incidentally this was O’Carrolls 100th competitive game (in all competitions) since the clubs inception in 2005.

I’d also like to remind everybody that Richie said in his match report that “it pays to ignore the coach”. Those were his words…

24.04.06 LEAGUE RESULT APR 23 – City Fringe 1 – 6 O’Carrolls

Gameweek three of our 4th Division campaign saw us pitted against City Fringe; we’d heard whispers that they were one of the stronger teams we’d meet in the division so it certainly wasn’t a matter of just turning up – we were expecting a tough contest. CF had missed out on promotion to Division 3 last season only on goal difference, pipped to the post by Bay Olympic Reserves.

Captain Gus was going to miss this fixture – he was off swanning about in Sydney – so Bidcom donned the captain’s armband for the day. The ever-reliable Dave Walsh joined him in the midfield; Gibbo & Olly were on the flanks. Tim continued with the centre-half pairing of Woody and Paul Tancell with Tom on the right and Dan Bradley recovered from a quad strain to start at left back. It was Richie’s turn between the sticks today, Matt was on the bench. Up front top scorer Dan Green was partnered once more by Ash in what is fast becoming a lucrative partnership – 4 goals between them already this season, and this tally was to be doubled today.

The rain that poured down during the warm-up eased off and eventually stopped just in time for kick off. OC’s were unusually the quicker team off the blocks and enjoyed a nice spell of early possession. With the wind and wet surface it was always going to be worth having a pop on goal today and that was how the first goal came about after only 10 minutes. The CF keeper failed to gather a speculative effort on goal and Dan Green slid in to poke the ball into the corner to make it 1-0. Great goal from Dan, purely because he never gave up on it and got his reward for doing so. The floodgates kind of opened up after that first goal, CF were pinned back into their own half for pretty much the next half hour. The lead was doubled by Dave Walsh after an OC’s corner; a left footed volley from about twenty yards out from the Irishman, the CF keeper rose to meet it at his near post but somehow let it slip through his hands. 2-0. Then Ash got in on the action. Tom picked up a loose ball in the midfield and after controlling struck a not-particularly fierce shot at goal (but on target), the keeper could only parry the shot to his left where Ash was on hand to take a touch before smashing it home. 3-0. The fourth goal, and Ash’s second, came about from another set piece. A corner ball whipped in by Olly, Paul Tancell rose to head it back across goal and Ash was in the right place to make it 4-0. It was a great spell from the new signing and he seemed to be involved in almost every attack. The lead could have been further extended after Ash played a terrific one-two with Tom and it was only down to a lack of control from the fullback that the opportunity was wasted. It wasn’t long however before the CF keeper was picking the ball out of his net again; this time Ash collecting the ball on the right, he took his time and picked out the head of Dan Green with a precision cross; 5-0 and another fine finish from Dan.

The first half was pretty much all OC’s; CF did break a couple of times, and with pace, so our defence was kept on its toes. They had some pretty tall lads so they were always a threat at corners and free kicks. OC’s goal was rarely threatened first half, but there was still the second half to come.

One unfortunate incident in the first half saw our keeper pick up quite a bad knock. A ball over the top dropped in between Richie and the OC’s centre half. Having not heard the keepers call, Paul opted to clear the danger only for the oncoming Richie to strike the underside of his boot. Richie went down in what looked to be quite a painful injury, he semi-shook it off to see out the rest of the half, albeit with the centre-halves now taking the goal kicks. The injury however proved to be too painful and Matt stepped in for the second half. Just as well we have two goalkeepers!

Second half and OC’s again had the brighter start. Not long in and Olly on the right picked up a ball from Tancell in defence, carried it a few yards before sending in one of his trademark crosses. It didn’t find any OC’s players however, but did find the back of the net – dipping in over the keepers head to make it 6-0. Another quality goal from Olly Beckham and his third of the campaign.

As the half wore on CF started to battle their way back into the game. OC’s passing was beginning to get sloppy and we started playing a lot of long balls up to our forwards – a lot of the time they were overhit. With the wind against us OC’s defence were sitting a little deeper and CF made the most of this, stringing together attack after attack. They were first to most balls and always seemed to have an extra man in the middle of the field. At this point the gaffer decided to make a few changes, with Nev replacing Dave Walsh in the midfield and Barry & Jonesy replacing Olly & Gibbo respectively. CF continued to press however and OC’s were resigned to trying to hit them on the break. With one such attack the OC’s right back found himself one-on-one with the CF keeper but one touch too many saw the final shot deflect off the diving keeper for a corner.

CF were getting closer to clawing a goal back; they had one cleared off the line and they were making their height count at the set pieces – a few headers missing the target. It was from one of these set pieces that they did finally get on the score sheet. A CF corner was headed clear, only to be picked up about 35 yards out by one of their players. With the OC’s defense rushing out the ball was pumped back into the box where the CF forward got in front of our centre half and got enough on the ball to direct it past our wrong footed keeper. There wasn’t a whole Matt could have done about it, good finish from CF. 6-1, and that was how the game finished. Some better finishing from CF would almost certainly have seen them get a couple more goals back second half; they created plenty of opportunities late on. Man Of The Match went to Biddy and thoroughly deserved. He captained the side well and his voice was always heard throughout the game.

CF - thanks to your man for reffing and thank you for the game. A very competitive second half. All the best for the rest of the season and we’ll see you next round. Next up for O’Carrolls – our old Division 5 rivals Lane Xang FC. Looking forward to 90 minutes of football against them… or perhaps a little longer…

The Editor

18.04.06 6-A-SIDE RESULT APR 13 – O’Carrolls 3 – 0 Hamstrung

The final game of our 6-A-Side campaign pitted us against archrivals Hamstrung. Having secured the title the previous week, Hamstrung were looking for a 10th consecutive victory; O’Carrolls were looking to stop them bettering our record of nine wins and a draw. We had struggled earlier in the day to get a team together; it would have been disappointing to only field five at this stage of the competition, but Biddy stepped in to give us six and EJ (intending only to be a spectator) kitted out and started as sub in what will be his last appearance for O’Carrolls for sometime.

The referee obviously felt this was going to be a hostile game; both captains were called to the centre circle before kick off and given the word of warning. I guess considering some of our previous encounters with Hamstrung he can be forgiven. We’re less forgiving, however, of the fact that he’s a rubbish ref, but that’s neither here nor there. After about five minutes, it was quite clear there was only one team going to win this game. OC’s were passing the ball around well, Gus and Biddy creating plenty of openings with Hamstrung left to chase the ball down. The form that saw them go nine games unbeaten looked to have deserted them today and it was OC’s that opened the scoring through Gus. A fantastic individual goal, he weaved his way past two or three Hamstrung players before smashing the ball home for his seventh of the campaign. 1-0.

Second half and things got worse for the champions. Their frustrations were boiling over and they seemed to be taking it out on each other. Biddy made the most of their lack of concentration to blast one home after finding himself one-on-one with their keeper. 2-0. Not long after and he added his second, OC’s third, to put the game beyond Hamstrung. It was a terrific performance from OC’s, particularly goalscorers Biddy and Gus. The highlight of the evening was some mesmerising footwork from Gus that left one of the Hamstrung lads megged and rooted to his spot – truly made a monkey of! Hamstrung were well beaten; they had their chances of course – you’ll always get a couple in 6-A-Side – but Richie was more than up to everything they threw at him.

The defeat to Sverge a few weeks ago has proved to be very costly – victory there would have almost certainly seen us take the title for the third consecutive time. All the same, with OC’s not entering the next round of 6-A-Side, this victory was the perfect way to sign off. It’s a long time ago that Hamstrung notched a 5-0 victory against a fledgling OC’s 6-A-Side team (Richie seeing red that night); they are without a victory in five now - see you in the winter maybe.

The Editor

10.04.06 LEAGUE RESULT APR 09 – NZ Chinese 0 – 5 O’Carrolls

It was another wet and dreary day as O'Carrolls and NZ Chinese stepped out for their first encounter at St Michael's Ave. Reserve. O'Carrolls were on the back of a good run having beaten both premier and second division teams pre season, and having started this campaign with a 7-0 win. It was imperative therefore that we kept our focus and that we maintained the standards that we set ourselves.

We eventually kicked off 10 mins later than scheduled but the lads didn't disappoint and started the game at an electric pace. With Gussy and Biddy dominating in midfield where nothing got passed them, and Gussy (all 5-foot-nothing of him) winning every aerial challenge, the writing looked on the wall for the NZC lads after the first 10 minutes. These midfield maestros were spinning balls out to Olly on the right wing and Gibbo on the left who in turn were providing excellent balls to Ash and Dan upfront. With all this possession there was still a blank scoreboard until the 15th minute when the ball was won back in the NZC half. A quick pass to Ash took it to the byline where he picked out Dan on the six-yard line for a cool finish. 1-0.

OC’s continued to dominate with the lads at the back getting involved with some excellent wing back play by Tom. But for all that possession OC’s were not making it count, with a few wayward shots and the post and bar contriving to keep the score down. Eventually though, the second goal arrived. Again the ball was won by Gussy in the NZC half and he slid a perfectly weighted pass into the path of Ash who tucked it under the body of the oncoming NZC keeper. A neat finish for Ash’s first goal for the club. 2-0. Half time was nearing and Matt in the OC’s goal had just had his first touch of the game; it was time for the Woody show. Having got involved in the early exchanges of the move, our centre half found himself 25 yards out with a bit of space. The ball was played to him and after a quick look up he unleashed a shot and a half, into the roof of the net - goal of the game if not a contender for the season. So half-time and 3-0 to OC's.

NZC must have had a good team talk at half time because they started the second half with a strong determination. OC's were being made to work for every ball, and finally from about our 10th corner of the game, Olly climbed highest and finished with a strong header at the near post... 4-0. This did not deter NZC who proceeded to have their best spell of the game. Within a five-minute spell, two excellent efforts at goal were thwarted by two fine saves from Matt. Some wayward shooting, a couple of good saves, and the post and bar (again) looked like keeping the scoreline as it was, but with 10 mins remaining, Man Of The Match, Gussy had another punt from the edge of the box. Having seen two previous efforts hit the bar and post, he was none too happy to see this one hit the post as well, but fortunately Olly was on hand to follow up and make it 5-0, his second of the game, and complete an excellent performance from each and every player.

A big thank you to the NZC lads who never gave up and best of luck for the remainder of the season.

The Coach

07.04.06 FORMAL APOLOGY TO NEVILLE…

Dear All,

As you all know it was necessary for me to stand up and publicly apologise for the misdemeanour in relation to our original football kit. Unfortunately Neville was not present that evening at training, due to his commitments with his charity work, and did not hear said apology. Indeed Neville has written to these same pages intimating the feelings of trauma etc that one experiences when the finger of blame was pointing to him.

It was with this in mind that Neville suggested to me that the least I could do is to post a written apology to ensure that all concerned are aware of Neville’s innocence. Well.... I thought... you can stick your apology up the high hole of your arse... but then as Neville is a good foot taller than me when seated, an apology sounded like a good idea.

So without further ado... I apologise Neville that when the kit went 'missing', the finger of blame was pointed at you. As you say, the sole reason for the blame being apportioned to your good self appeared to be on the basis of your birthplace back in ‘ol blighty.

Hopefully now the matter can rest here.

P.S. I checked with the launderette and they say that the flags are not there.

Richard ‘Theftie’ O’Neill

07.04.06 6-A-SIDE RESULT APR 06 – O’Carrolls 3 - 1 Skillz That Killz

O’Carrolls penultimate 6-A-Side game before we take a sabbatical from the indoor league saw us up against bottom side Skillz That Killz. It’s been three defeats from three for the newcomers, but credit to them for making the top group first time of asking; some teams have been playing there for years and still can’t manage it.

It was a strong line up for OC’s; Dave Walsh was back from his overseas trip and Nev had shaken off an ankle injury to line up with Gus, Tom and Tancell. Richie was, as per usual, between the sticks, Woody was starting as sub. We started fairly well, and probably had the majority of both the possession and chances early on. We mustn’t have been doing much wrong; Richie was unusually quiet in goal - how long would that last? Despite the early pressure, we failed to finish any of the chances we created, and just when it seemed that STK might frustrate us in front of goal, up stepped top scorer Dave Walsh to volley home his 9th goal in 6 games. Terrific finish from Dave, but not enough to get him off the bench on Sunday. Gus soon doubled the lead with a fine finish. He’d been making weaving runs all game and a goal for him always looked on the cards.

Second half and we took our foot off the gas a little, and let STK into a game they really should have been well out of. Perhaps that’s the problem this time; in previous rounds we’ve punished weaker teams, putting 6/7/8 goals past them. The same ruthlessness isn’t there at the moment, but it’s understandable, we’ve played an awful lot of football over the last few months, and a break from the indoor might be just the trick.

Woody put the game beyond doubt, poking home to make it 3-0. He’d battled hard to create the opening, and it was a deserved goal. A poor decision from the referee marred what was a relatively fair game. An elbow from an STK player wasn’t spotted, but the following 50-50 shoulder from Gus was penalized with a free kick. Cries of ‘yellow card’ from said STK player prompted Gus to tell him what to do with himself, and out came the red card. Undeserved, but we know what most of these refs are like at this stage. So six on five, and STK managed to pull a goal back. It was a soft goal to concede, but at that late stage it really had little bearing on the outcome – merely a consolation goal.

Next week, Hamstrung. That’s gonna be fun. As I’ve said before, we can’t win it, but we can certainly affect who does.

The Editor

03.04.06 LEAGUE RESULT APR 02 – O’Carrolls 7 - 0 Sociables

So here we go, the second season for O'Carrolls FC kicks off, as newly promoted arrivals to the Division 4 campaign. A few things have changed since last season... Captain Keet has flown away, Jurgen The German is no doubt banging various nubile young females and Alfie "Self-proclaimed journalist" can't walk properly. But optimism was still high going into our first match against Sociables.

It was a wet Seddon Fields, but the rain eventually abated and the pitch was in very good condition for our first home match. A very strong OC’s took the pitch, with new centre back Woody and Dan at fullback the only changes in the defensive line-up. Wannabe lined up alongside new Captain Gus, with Bidcom (who unsurprisingly had his mind elsewhere) and last year's top scorer Dan Green up front. The Usual Suspects were on the flanks - Olly, Tom, Gibbo and Tancey with Richie providing the ever-solid spine down the middle. The training sessions had been good and we were very confident going into the new season. Also, the spankingly attractive kit is first class and we looked like we meant business. We arrived on time and warmed up together, showing great togetherness within the team. Even Alfie was allowed to pass the ball around with the big boys!

The game kicked off and within 15 minutes a win for OC’s seemed inevitable. We passed it around well and Sociables couldn't get out of their own half. Early chances came and went, however. Bidcom worked hard but was disappointed with a point-blank header that went over from the edge of the six-yard box. Wannabe hit the bar via a deflection; Gus chipped a long ranger into the keeper's arms and after 20 minutes it was still 0-0. Gibbo was given acres of space on the left-hand side but couldn't deliver that killer ball. Ironically, it was Bidcom pulling off to the left who created the first goal. Gibbo cut inside before feeding Bidcom. The doughty Northerner fired in a low cross, which Dan Green directed into the net, wrong-footing the Sociables keeper. A quality finish and a great team goal... but it wasn't as special as the second strike five minutes later. A superb passing move from back to front, involving Tom and Wannabe predominantly led to Gussage striking the ball low into the corner, leaving the goalkeeper no chance. It was 2-0 at halftime but it should have been 6-0.

As we so often do, OC’s started the second half quietly, unable to really get a hold on the ball. An innocuous pass back by Tansolo to Richie gifted a free kick to Sociables, but Wannabe charged the strike down. It needed something special to arrest the melancholy... Gibbo had worked hard all game, but his crosses hadn't found their targets. So after marauding down the left flank with a 40-yard run, he decided not to cross, and fired a bullet-like shot into the roof of the net; certainly an early contender for goal of the season. The writing was now on the wall... after a mazy run from Wannabe, he fed Dan Green who side-footed home for his second. A superb OG made it 5-0... and then the defensive boys got in on the act.

Tansolo, who is never scared of charging forward, collected the ball on the edge of the box. He struck a powerful, dipping, weaving pile driver that the keeper just couldn't hold on to. But the piece de resistance was saved for the final goal. Tom, who had charged up and down the flanks like a mad thing all game, found himself in the opposition box. After wiping clean his nosebleed, he struck a shot with the outside of his boot... a la Roberto Carlos... into the top corner; a fantastic finish from the Man Of The Match.

So 7-0 and a great start to the campaign. Sociables are obviously a 'social' team, but they never gave up and took the defeat in great spirit. There was one 'dodgy' tackle in the whole game and even their centre back celebrated his OG. I hope they manage to get a few wins because they seemed like a good bunch.

Then it was back to OC’s were we had a standard Sunday evening. Chip butties, lots of beer, fines for swearing, and a stripper with a body to die for dressed as a schoolgirl shoving her snatch in Bidcom's face...

Why can't it always be like that!?

Cheers

Alfie