continued....
I'm back to the place I started, the first time I ever kissed you
When I could still fall in love, when I still wanted to
My feelings for you have faded in the winds of change and time
But never did the burning desire to have your body next to mine
The warmth of your breath on my neck, our hands meshed together
Right now, I think I could stay like this forever
Now the sun rises and you are gone, disappearing into the light
I tuck away all that I felt and vow to sleep alone tonight
Stone 10/97
Close the door behind you, the sun will be up soon
Hide me from the twisted light, tell me when its silver moon
And still you wont let me know, paint it on, its all a show
Let me up from beneath you, your laughter and your lies
Darkness fall upon me, shadowing your golden eyes
And still you wont let me leave, break the heart upon my sleeve
The stone that beats inside you, the silver dagger you hold
Go ahead and walk away, I'm far too numb to feel the cold
And still the tainted blood tastes sweet, this kind of pain is hard to beat
Rant 12/99
Candlelight, shadows of my possessions, reading Ginsberg, my eyes ache
Another friend has died, this time in spirit, not body
This isn't funny anymore, there's no humor in it at all
How to take things seriously? Life is such a joke.
How to grow up when the world is so petty
There's so much I'll never understand and so much more I wish I didn't
Does everyone feel this way sometimes, or am I as alone as I feel?
The sun won't be out for awhile, I don't have to see
Thousands of bodies, murdered each day
Just as many commit suicide....coincidence??
If God is so good, why don't more people believe
Break the Chain, Fleetwood Mac, on CD
Our parents lived for the future, we watch old footage of Woodstock with envy
I wish something exciting would happen, something good, something new
Something that isn't digital
If Bill Gates gave everyone in the world a dollar, he could still buy a small country
Yet, people eat out of my garbage can-and I shop at the food bank
I smoke, and I enjoy it
They call it depression, I call it realism
They call it help, I call it free drugs
I can hear trees falling in the forest, by the way
And then it dawns on me....only the page can hear me
One day, I will be happy
But if one day I own happiness, will I sell it for something more?
Most people would
I like to think I'm not like most people
But then again, so do most people
A Thought
~If I could hide my face from myself
Maybe then I would be beautiful~
