| JACK HANDY |
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| �Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy looks out it, and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess that's like a regular window.�
�It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. And I guess that's what I like about it. It's easy. Just sitting there, rocking back and forth, wanting that money.� �Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at the word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words "mank" and "ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery and that's why so is mankind.� �One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is, don't run with wooden stakes.� �Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.� �Somebody told me how frightening it was how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around the campfire and nobody got scared.� �Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights, even if you don't know what your rights are, or who the person is you're talking to. Then on the way out, slam the door.� �Sometimes you have to be careful when selecting a new name for yourself. For instance, let's say you have chosen the nickname �Fly Head.� Normally you would think that �Fly Head� would mean a person who has beautiful swept-back features, as if flying through the air. But think again. Couldn't it also mean �having a head like a fly�? I'm afraid some people might actually think that. � �To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography and the dancers hit each other.� �To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, �Hey, can you give me a hand?� You can say, �Sorry, got these sacks.� " �Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny. � �Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the room talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books.� |