Unknown Separation
Chapter Five: The Beginning

It isn't something he wants to do. At least not at the moment. He has promised Jen that he would pick-up Joey and drive her to Capeside. And why does he do it? Because Jen is a smooth talker at times, and maybe deep down, there is something in him that hopes that maybe Joey will have a reasonable explanation as to why she never called or showed up that night.

He stands in front of her door tentative and hesitant and nervous. Several times he thought of turning back, but he sucks it up. He needs to know. So Pacey lifts his hand to knock on Joey’s door.

Inside her dorm Joey is bustling around, double-checking that she has everything. She's running a little late this morning and she knows that Jen will be here any minute. Glancing at the clock, Joey quickens her pace, frantically tidying up as she waits for the inevitable knock on the door signalling Jen's arrival.

Outside, Pacey’s knuckles pound on the door quickly. Three quick knocks.

"The door's open, Jen. I'm almost ready! I'm just running a little late." Joey apologizes.

"Uh, it's not Jen," he answers as he pushes the door to enter the room.

"Pacey?"

"The one and only."

She quickly recovers from her shock and scowls at her guest. "What are you doing here?"

"Why, I am you chauffer, Miss Potter. Are you ready to go?"

"Jen's taking me."

"Actually..." Pacey trailed, "She asked if I could take you."

"She did what?!"

"She asked me to drive you back to Capeside. Said something about leaving early with Jack to check on Mrs. Ryan," he clarified.

"Oh. Is everything all right with Mrs Ryan?"

"I believe so. I guess she couldn't wait to see her and just wanted to spend as much extra time with her,” he postulated.

"So she asked you to pick me up. Great." Joey sighs in resignation. "Well, I suppose I'll have to go with you. It's not like I have any other choice."

"If you don't want to ride with me it's your choice," he bends down to pick up her bags.

“However, I don't mind your company either." He stands erect with bags fully gripped in his hands.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Joey asks frostily.

"It means you can choose to take another form of transportation back to Capeside or you can ride with me. It means that if you choose to ride with me, it would be a pleasure to be in your company."

"And somehow that sounds so very heartfelt. I think I know which option you'd rather have me take. It's fine though, I'll find my own way to Capeside."

He puts her bag down, now totally confused as to why Joey is acting this way. "What are you talking about?"

"All I'm saying is that I wouldn't want to put you out seeing as that my company is, oh, so painful for you." She grabs her bag. "So, I'll probably see you in Capeside. Although, preferably not."

"Whoa, there," Pacey steps in front of her. "What do you mean your company is painful for me? I said I wouldn't mind riding in a car with you. I said it would be a pleasure to have your company. Where in those phrases do I say your company would be painful?"

"It's called reading in between the lines, Pacey. And maybe something to do with your tone of voice. Now if you'll let me go, I must get going. I have a bus to catch."

"Forget the bus, Potter. I'm taking you home." His tone isn't forceful, just adamant.

"Oh, and who made you boss and king of me?"

"Joey, calm down. I don't know what's eating you. Maybe you want to go grab a snack or something? Give you time to cool down before we leave?"

"I do not have PMS!"

Pacey laughs. "I didn't say you did." He takes her hand along with her bags. "C'mon. Capeside is calling."

"You implied it. And I'm not going anywhere with you!"

"Potter, is something wrong? Because, I for the life of me, can't figure out why you are acting like this?" He questions.

"Maybe it's about the way you just casually had sex with me and then dumped me like yesterday's trash,” hisses Joey.

"Now hold on there. I didn't dump you like yesterday's trash. You were the one to dump me," he countered.

"And when did I have time to dump you? You were out the door before I had the pleasure."
“I told you I had work. I work at 6 am. I needed to get there on time so I wouldn’t get fired. That's not a hard concept to grasp."

"It's also a very convenient excuse to leave as quickly as possible."

"It wasn't an excuse. Shit. You can even ask Gretchen how early in the morning I wake up and what time I go to work."

"Whatever. You're making me late for the bus with this pointless conversation. So, if you've said everything you wanted to say...Can I go now?"

"Actually, I’m not quite done yet. I still have a few questions for you. Like what time you get off work?"

"7:30pm. Is there any point to this?"

"Yeah, and I'll get to the point in a minute." Pacey takes a moment to calm himself down. He doesn't want to have a screaming match with her. He takes a deep breath before continuing.

"7:30." He nods. "And how often do you check your answering machine?"

"Either me or Val will check it at least once a day. And there were no messages from you, so don't even try to pretend you called me and left a message."

"There wasn't a message from me?" Pacey’s incredulous. "There wasn't a message, say around 7:00pm that evening? There wasn't a message stating that I thought we needed to talk? There wasn't a message asking you to meet me later on that night at The Lounge and to call me if you couldn't make it?" Pacey shakes his head. "You're telling me that I called the wrong phone number? No...wait. I couldn't have. I mean, the machine did say 'You've reached Val and Joey. We can't come to the phone right now.' That is what your machine says, right? I mean I did dial the number correctly. I did so several times before leaving the damn message, Joey." Pacey is exasperated.

"Well, there wasn't any message. And our machine does not have a history of swallowing up messages. So, if there wasn't a message then you didn't call. You must have called some other Val and Joey,” comes Joey’s snide reply.

"I don't think so." Pacey begins to pace back and forth trying to figure out what the hell is going on; how she apparently didn't get his message. As Pacey walks back and forth across the small floor of Joey and Val’s dorm, a familiar face enters the room.

"PJ, what are you doing here?" A perky voice questions from the doorway. "Hey, Jo, you didn't tell me Pacey was stopping by. I thought you were leaving for the holiday weekend today?"

Pacey stops in his tracks to find Val all bubbly holding some shopping bags.

"I am leaving. Right now, as a matter of fact. And Pacey was just here to visit you. Why don't you go entertain your guest? You can show him some of the stuff you've bought. I have to get going." Joey grabs her bag and begins making her way to the door.

Pacey runs to grab her. "Not just yet." He pulls Joey back along with her bags. "I have one more question. And then we can both go back to Capeside via my car." Pacey holds on to Joey's hand to make sure she doesn't make a run for it. He turns to Val. "Val, can you answer me this one question?"

"Sure, PJ."

"Let's say about several days ago, around evening time, do you recall receiving any phone messages from me?"

"Hmmm....let me think. No." Joey gives Pacey this look of 'I told you so' and tries to pull away from him, but is unsuccessful. "Unless you called that one night where I, actually it was all Chris's fault,” Val giggles at the memory, “the answering machine fell and all the messages were accidentally deleted. I think that was Thursday night. Yep. Thursday night."

Joey stares at Val aghast. "You never told me about Thursday night!"

"Oh, well I figured if it was important the person would call back. Why, what's the matter?"

Pacey stands not believing all this. It's like some force wants to bestow all this angst upon him.

"Ah, uh..." Joey stares at Pacey before picking up her bag again. "I have to go, uh, catch that, uh, bus."

"I don't think so, Potter. Thanks, Val, for that tidbit of information. Joey and I,” he emphasizes, “will be leaving for good ol' Capeside now. Have a good Thanksgiving Weekend." Pacey bids a farewell to Val, ushers Joey and himself out the room, and closes the door while holding on to Joey's bag.

"You don't have to take me, you know," Joey says quietly.

"I want to take you," he responds in the same tone. They walk into the awaiting elevator. Their eyes affixed on the silver door.

"Well, thank you."

"You're welcome." The elevator doors open. They walk silently to his car. He opens the door for her and closes it as she begins to put her seatbelt on. After placing her bag in the trunk, he walks over to the driver's side and settles in. As soon as he's ready, they pull out of the Worthington campus and make their way onto the highway.

The familiar signs of Capeside roll by and it is like being slowly transported back to another time and place. The trip has been quiet, not many words spoken, and she wrings her hands together and closes her eyes. Too many thoughts, too many feelings. Too much.

Pacey sneaks several glances at Joey as he pulls into the B&B driveway. "We're here," he points out the obvious as he turns off the ignition. He hustles out of his seat to open the door for her on the other side. "Let me get your bag." He walks over to the trunk to retrieve her bag and smiles handing it to her.

"Thanks." She bites her lip and hesitates before asking, "Do you want to come in? "

"Sure, I have some time to kill before I go to Dougie's. Here let me get that." He retakes her bag and walks her the rest of the way to the B&B. "Are Bessie and Bodie home to meet you?"

There's a note stuck haphazardly on the door. "Obviously not." Joey takes it and reads it. "They've taken Alex to the doctor's for a checkup. So it looks like I get the place to myself for now."

"Ah, you wanna call up Jen and Jack and see if they want to go grab some dinner?" He asks as they enter the house. "That is, after you get your things to together?”

"Okay." The recent turn of events has Joey numb and half-mute, not to mention sick all over. She doesn’t know what to say or do and her thoughts are all jumbled, so instead she quietly acquiesces to all of Pacey’s suggestions. Maybe Joey’ll have a chance to talk to Jen and have a sane voice of reason to help her sift through her thoughts and emotions.

"Sounds good. I can wait here until your ready. Let me just call Doug and tell him my plans."

"Okay." Joey sighs and turns around, heading down the hall.

As soon as Joey disappears into her room, Pacey picks up the phone and dials Doug’s number. He waits several rings before the phone is answered.

“Hello?”

"Hey, Dougie."

"Little brother. I see you made it home safely."

"That I did, bro. Listen. Joey and I are going to have dinner with Jack and Jen tonight. So, I'll get to your place later on tonight."

"That's fine. I'll see you then. Don't cause any trouble."

"Now would I do that?" Pacey laughs. "See you tonight, Doug." Pacey hangs up and goes to the kitchen for a drink.

The world seems to crash down upon Joey as she steps into the familiar surroundings of her childhood room. She collapses on her bed and closes her eye, half-asleep, and tries not to think. Her whole body feels unbearably hot and Joey half-consciously starts stripping the layers of clothing off. Laboriously, her right hand moves up to rub the temples of her forehead; her head hurts and she feels so tired.

Pacey takes a glance at the clock by the kitchen. Joey's been in her room for a while. "Jo, I'll call Jack and Jen about dinner. You just keep doing what you're doing." He yells before picking up the phone and dialing Jen's number.

The phone rings and Jen picks up. "Mrs Ryan's house of debauchery."

"Well, well. Then may I please speak to the head of this house of debauchery,” Pacey chuckles on his end of the line.

"Unfortunately, Mrs Ryan is entertaining a guest at the moment. Can I help you sir?" Jen continues with the charade.

"Ah, I see. I think you may be able to help me. I'm looking for a tall, handsome young man and a petite blonde babe to have dinner with. Do you think you can help me with that?"

"Ooh, threesome. Kinky. I'm in and Jack'll be in too."

"How does a foursome sound?"

"Foursome? Dare I ask?"

Pacey laughs. "Dinner with you, Jack, Joey and I. How does that sound?"

"Great. So, I take it things went well with Joey?”

“Yes. No. I suppose you could say that. I guess everything is still a little bit iffy at the moment but better than what it was before.”

“You’re going to have to elaborate further,” Jen warns. “Why don't you come over in say, half an hour and I can grill the two of you then?"

"Yeah, fine. Of course, this is all dependant on whether I can get Miss Josephine out of her room. See you then."

"Bye."

Pacey hangs up the phone and walks over to Joey’s room. He knocks on the door. No answer. Just some vague sounding movements, like the rustling of bed sheets. "Jo," he speaks to the door, "I called Jen and said we would meet her in half an hour. You think you'll be ready by then?"

Joey shifts restlessly around in her bed. She's down to her underwear now and has somehow managed to unfasten the clasp of her bra. It hangs loosely on the top of her chest, ready to fall away at any moment. She thinks that she hears Pacey voice but she isn't too sure.

"Jo, can you hear me?" Pacey turns the doorknob to peek inside. He's taken aback by the view before him. A barely naked goddess. "Uh, Joey?"

She moans in response and kicks at the sheets. Her bra slides down her left arm.

He walks over quietly and stands before her lying form. He kneels down reaches out to touch her. "Potter," he caresses her arm lightly in an up and down motion. "Should I cancel out on dinner? You seem tired."

"Hot." Joey croaks out. The bra falls completely away. Her skin is impossibly flushed and she moans once more.

Pacey stifles a groan. He's aroused by the view before him. "Let me go turn the AC on for you." He walks toward the door to turn the thermostat to a suitable setting. "It should be getting cooler in a bit. You still up for dinner?" The sight of her naked before him arouses him, but there is something about the situation that doesn’t call for ravishing her.

“Tired." Her hair is damp and clinging to her face. "Hot."

"Okay," he pushes away strands of hair that have fallen over her face. "Let me go get you a drink and a wet cloth to cool you off." Pacey walks toward the kitchen for a drink and stops by the bathroom for a face cloth and dampens it with cold water before returning to her room. He places the drink on her bedside table. With the cloth he begins to wipe her forehead gently. "This should help cool you down." Gently, he continues wiping her face, from cheeks down to neck. "I think you may be catching a cold."

"Hmm.” A sigh of relief as she feels the cool water touching her heated flesh. "A little lower please."

Slowly he washes the cloth over her heaving chests and then down to her navel. He tries to concentrate all his thoughts on caring for Joey and ignore his libido. For the moment his duty is to care for her. "Here, take a sip," he says lifting her head slightly and bringing the cool glass of water to her lips.

"Thank you." Joey murmurs. Her eyelids begin to close. "Stay with me?"

"Sure. Let me call Jen to tell her that we won't be able to make dinner." He moves off the bed, placing the glass and cloth on the table. Then, lifts the thin bed sheet over her thin frame. As soon as she's tucked in, he walks out and closes the door to her room. Once again he dials the Ryan residence and waits for Jen to pick up.

"Mrs. Ryan's Pizza Delivery. How can I help you?" Jen answers the phone.

"I need to cancel my order. My friend is not feeling well."

"And what happened to little Pacey?" Jen coos. "Did little Pacey hurt himself?"

Pacey chuckles. "Actually, baby Joey is feeling under the weather. Jen, she was hot enough in this cool November air to undress and lie restlessly in her bed,” he sighs.

"You guys had SEX AGAIN?!" Jen has obviously only caught the end part of Pacey’s conversation.

"No, Jen. She must have undressed when I was talking to you on the phone, 'cause when I went into her room she was clothed only in her underwear." He switches the phone to his other ear. "She was lying before me when I opened the door."

"And then you had sex and she's wiped out now?" Jen asks, still misinterpreting Pacey’s words.

"No sex, Jen. Besides, there is still that issue of her not showing up to meet me. She left me hanging for two hours. I waited two hours for her, and she never showed up, and no phone call to boot. Then we find out she never got the message." Pacey sighs. "To top it off, nothing was really said on the car ride back here."

"Well, then she didn't really reject you did she? You really need to talk to her. But right now, if Joey's as sick as you say she is, you might want to tend to her."

"I plan on it. You guys can bring over some food here." Pacey hints. "I'm kinda hungry and Bessie and Bodie took Alex to an appointment."

"Fine. We will. I'll talk to you later."

"Thanks, Lindley." Pacey hangs up the phone and returns to Joey's bedside. "We should put something on you before our guests arrive. Not to mention your sister and Bodie and Alex." He moves to her dresser drawers and finds a loose fitting tee shirt. "Hmmm..." It's reminiscent of one of his own. "Joey, isn't this one of mine?"

"It's nice and comfy. Smells like you." Joey rambles.

Pacey grins. "Well, why don't we get this on you then. Jen and Jack are bringing dinner over here."

"’Kay."

Pacey helps her slide the shirt over her head. She pokes her arms through the sleeves and before falling back on the bed. He sits on the bed next to her. "Why don't we watch some TV until Jack and Jen arrive? Maybe Bessie and Bodie will be here soon too."

"Just lie with me? Please?"

"I can do that." And with those words, Pacey settles onto the bed and takes Joey in his arms. "You just rest. I'll let you know when the two J's get here."

He places a kiss on her forehead.

"Love you, Pacey." Joey mumbles before falling into a deep sleep.

“I love you two, sweetie." He watches her as she sleeps. At times he looks around the room and remembers all the times they've spent together. He can still watch her sleep all night. It would never be an obligation. It would be a pleasure. Her sleeping presence enraptures him.

Too soon, there is a knock on the door.

"Jo, I think Jack and Jen are here," he whispers, though she doesn’t seem to hear him. "I'm going to go let them in."

When he reaches the front door of the Potter B&B, Pacey discovers that his guess was correct. Jack and Jen stand outside waiting for someone to answer the door.

"Hey, Pacey. We come bearing food," Jen announces, holding up a large bag of take-away.

"Ah, wonderful. You are a life saver." He takes the bag from them and settles the bag on the table. "Jen, can you go check up on Jo while Jack and I get things together out here?"

Jen stares pointedly at Pacey discerning his motive. "Little boys' talk? Don't worry I'll go and let you two discuss whatever you need to discuss."

"You do that, Lindley." Pacey shoos her off, he then turns to his other friend. "Jack, I need some advice."

"Talk and I'll see what I can dispense." Jack replies as he distributes the plates around the table.

"Well, I slept with Joey."

"You what?" He nearly drops a plate.

"A few days after we saw each other again, she invited me to her room to talk. And, well, it was like one thing led to another, fuelled by passion and lust and longing."

"So, what's the problem? Are the two of you back together again?"

"No. I don't know. Right now, everything is just screwed up. I left in the morning because of work which she thinks doesn't exist by the way. I called her later that evening to ask her to meet me so we could talk. I didn't want anything to be left hanging and misunderstood."

"So what happened?"

"She never showed up. I waited two hours, Jack. And she never showed up. Didn't call either. Then today, when I confronted her about it, she denies receiving any messages from me. We have it out for a while until Val shows up to clarify things. Turns out the messages were accidentally deleted. She never knew."

"Have you two talked about it yet?" Jack queries as he places napkins by the plates he previously set.

"That's the problem. The ride up here was mostly silence save for the radio. And now she's lying in bed sick."

"Well, you're going to have to talk to her. Maybe you should be the first to bring it up. She may be scared and hesitant too. Remember your history."

"And history says that I'm always the one to make the first move." Pacey sighs pouring out the food into bowls.

"Just go talk to her." Jack suggests. " And then whatever happens go from there."

"You're a good friend, Jackers."

"Yes, I know." Jack smiles.

Jen finds her way to Joey's bedroom only to discover her friend fast asleep. She also notes that Joey’s face is unnaturally flushed and touches Joey’s forehead with the back of her palm; it’s burning hot. Fever. Moving away Jen continues to survey her friend, watching her shift about uncomfortably as she sleeps.

"Mom! Dad! Don't go. Pacey? Where is..." Joey cries out even though she is obviously still asleep.

"Joey?" Jen tries to shake her friend awake but Joey doesn't hear her. Instead her cries grow louder and more distressed.

From outside Pacey can hear the commotion. He and Jack run into the room. "What's going on?" he asks worriedly.

"Pacey." Jen calls in relief, still a little panicked. "I don't know what's wrong with her. It's like she's having a fever induced night terror."

"Jen, there's some medicine in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. Jack, could you get her another glass of water?"

The two disperse to their assigned destinations. Pacey goes to Joey and kneels by her side. "Joey, sweetie, I'm here." He grazes her cheek with the back of his hand. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Pacey?" Her voice trembles with fear.

"Yeah, Jo. I'm right here." He takes hold of her hand.

Joey shakes her head. "No, you're not. You're gone. You all go away."

"Jo, sweetie, I'm right here." He tries to comfort her and soothe away her fears. "Jack and Jen are here too." He states as the two enter back with a glass of water and some medication. "Bessie and Bodie will be here soon." He gently cups her face so that she can face him. "Look at me, Joey. I'm right here."

"You're not." Joey disputes, distraught. "I'm going to wake and you'll be gone."

"Joey, honey, open your eyes. Your friends are right here for you. We care too much about you to leave you." Pacey turns to look at Jack and Jen. They all wear worried expressions on their faces. He turns back to Joey. "Jo, open your eyes." He says more firmly but softly. "Please, open your eyes. We're right here."

Joey slowly opens her eyes and sees Pacey's deep blue staring at her in concern. "You're here."

"I told you. And I'm not the only one, Jo." He moves his face to show Jen and Jack behind him by the doorway.

"Hey." Joey smiles sheepishly at her friends. "When did the two of you get here?"

"Well, about 15 minutes ago. We brought food too." Jack moves forward. "Here, why don't you take a sip of this and some medicine?"

"Thanks." She takes a sip of the water and swallows the medicine. Her eyelids droop and she's beginning to fall asleep again, however her hand is tightly grasping onto Pacey's, not letting go even in sleep.

"Uh, why don't you guys start dinner without me. I'll be there in a few minutes." Pacey says to his friends. They nod and walk out.

He returns the hold and brings her hand to his lips. Her skin is heated and perspiration is forming. He lays her hand back on the bed then sits there quietly taking her in. The moonlight is shining through her windows and illuminates her face.

"You'll be okay, Jo. We'll be okay." He whispers and places a soft kiss on her lips. He gently pries his hand free from her sleeping form and walks out the door leaving it ajar.

*****

Thanksgiving morning. Bodie and Bessie are in the kitchen preparing the grand dinner. He's basting the turkey while Bessie is chopping up vegetables. Alex is in the living room within clear view of his parents. Joey is still asleep. Breakfast has been eaten and cleared away. Pacey is sitting on the Potter dock overlooking the creek. The air is crisp and cool.

Pacey reflects over the past few months - what has brought him here and where he may be headed. He thinks about his family. He'll be spending Thanksgiving dinner with the Potters. Gretchen is spending the holiday with a friend's family in Boston. Jen and Mrs. Ryan will have dinner with Jack, Andie and Mr. McPhee.

Pacey's mind wanders to yesterday's events and what led up to it. Joey seems to be feeling better when he last checked up on her earlier in this morning. He's worried about her though, worried about them. They still have to talk about what is going on between them. He sits there dangling his feet over the rippling water and continues to wonder what's in store for him and how he will handle what comes his way.

Joey's eyes flutter open. The throbbing in her head has subsided but she's still feeling very tired. Her mind is groggy and she's trying to remember the events of yesterday. She thinks she remembers Jack and Jen and Pacey being there but then it could have been her imagination. Her eyes close once more and sleep greets her again.

Pacey stands and stretches his tired limbs. He didn't sleep well. He hardly slept at all. If his eyes weren't closed they were watching Joey. He starts his way back to the house.

"Hey, Bess. Is Joey awake yet?" He inquires as he enters the B&B.

"I don't think so. You can check in on her. Here." Bessie hands him a glass of juice. "Let her drink this and see if she would like anything to eat. She missed breakfast. I'm sure she'll be hungry."

Pacey takes the glass from her and disappears into Joey's room. The sun is barely shining through the closed blinds. He walks over to open them and lets the light shine through her room.

Joey's somewhere between the sleeping and awake. Something within her, something instinctive seems to make her aware of Pacey's presence and she opens one eye. "Pacey?"

Pacey turns around from looking out the window. He smiles happy to see her awake. "Morning, Potter." He walks over to her side and takes her hand. "How are you feeling today?"

"Okay." Joey gives Pacey a small smile.

"Here," Pacey lifts the glass to her lips. "Drink this. Do you want anything to eat? You slept through breakfast."

"Um, yeah. Thanks." Joey smiles gratefully.

"Breakfast in bed or do you think you have enough strength to walk out?"

"Walk. Definitely."

Pacey gives her a hand as she gets up off her bed. He holds the door for her and then follows her out into the kitchen area.

They enter the kitchen and are greeted by Bess, Bodie and Alex. Alex runs forward and crash into Joey's legs, sending Joey stumbling.

"Aunt Jo-ey. You bet-ta?"

"Hey, Alex. Yes, I'm better."

Alex then turns his gaze onto Pacey. "Pay-ee! Unca Pay-ee!"

"Hey, little man." Pacey lifts Alex. "You wanna watch Aunt Joey eat?" He tickles the boy's tummy.

Alex giggles and nods his head. He grabs a spoon and clumsily heaps food on it. "Open up!"

"Not me, dude. Aunt Joey." He guide's Alex's hand towards Joey.

Joey rolls her eyes but opens her mouth anyway. Half the food falls into Joey's mouth and the other half on Joey's chest.

"Oops." Alex states and giggles. "Clean." He grabs a tissue and begins cleaning Joey's mouth.

"Aren't you the helpful little guy?" Pacey watches in amusement. "So, Bess, what time should I come over tonight?"

"Around 6:30. Dinner should be ready by then. Are you going to visit with your family first?"

"Yeah, I figured I should."

"Dirty Pay-ee." Alex announces and begins wiping his tissue over Pacey's face.

"Yes. Dirty Pacey." He tickles Alex and takes a clean napkin to wipe his face. "Why don't we go to the living room and watch Sesame Street. I hear today the letters are A and P with the number 5. What do you say?" He carries Alex to the living room and sits Indian style on the floor with his back leaning against the couch placing Alex on his lap.

"I need to get changed." Joey states wryly as she glances down at her clothes. "Thank you for breakfast. Bodie. It was delicious as per usual."

"I'm glad you feel better, Jo." Bodie replies his head searching the refrigerator.

"Yeah, well, I was lucky Pacey was there." Joey sneaks a glance at him as he sits, oblivious, watching Sesame Street with Alex.

"He really does care for you," Bessie states from behind Joey. "Is there something happening between you two again?" She ventures curiously.

"I think we're finally all right. I mean we haven't talked but I finally feel like I can be friends with him again. He's been this huge part of me, my life, and losing him the way I did...it hurt. But I think I'm at this point where I can say I loved him and I love him. And that he is one of my best friends ever. And I'm just happy to have that."

Bessie can see the way she looks at him. She is still in love with him. "As long as you’re happy, Jo. Go get cleaned up and dressed. I'm sure you'll want to talk with Pacey afterwards."

Joey nods and heads to the bathroom to get changed.

Pacey glances in Joey's direction as she disappears into the bathroom. He returns his gaze to the big yellow bird and green monster in the trashcan.

A shower is first priority and it has wonderful therapeutic and rejuvenating purposes. Looking in the mirror, Joey's complexion is less sallow and instead is beginning to show the signs of life once more. She dries herself and quickly changes, brushes her teeth and combs her hair. Her eyes seem to glow a little and somehow, Joey feels at peace and confident and ready to tackle all the problems in the world. After an evening of illness, the morning has brought revelations of some sorts and now it is time for confrontation. She marches out of the room and finds herself staring at Pacey and Alex.

Pacey can feel her eyes on him. He could always feel her presence even though eye contact wasn't made.

"I know I'm a good looking guy." He smirks.

"More like a conceited pig. I was just trying to figure out how Alex could stand your company. Although, I suppose, Alex always did want a pet."

"Haha. Actually, Alex enjoys my stimulating conversations. I would venture a bet that this little guy will be a Rhodes Scholar."

"No thanks to you. Uncle Pacey boring you to death?" Alex nods and grins and hugs Joey's legs. "Told you so."

"He nodded his head because he thought you said 'Is Uncle Pacey learning you to death?'" Pacey stands up. "Isn't that right, Alex?" The little boy nods his head.

"Alex, honey, come to mommy. It's time for your bath." Bessie calls and walks over to the living room. Alex toddles his way to his mother's arms.

"You're corrupting my nephew." Joey accuses.

"I am not." Pacey defends with laughter.

"You are too. Bessie complained about the way he eats his grapes a few weeks ago. And Alex's method has startling similarities to the way you eat your grapes."

"Throwing grapes in the air and catching them when they come down is all about eye coordination and balance."

"And spitting the seeds out and seeing how far they will go is a matter of aim?"

"Yes, it is. But I'll have you know, I prefer the seedless types. Much faster to swallow and chew."

Joey lets out a snort of disbelief before her laughter spills. "You're impossible."

"Yes, I know. I'm also faster than you." He races past her and out onto the dock. When he reaches the end he plops himself down on the wooden planks.

"You're so immature." Joey replies, walking with dignity to the dock and sitting herself down.

"What took you so long? I told you I was faster than you."

"There's something to be said for going nice and slow."

"Oh, there is, is there? Do tell, Ms. Snail."

"Do I really need to tell you?" Joey raises her eyebrows suggestively.

Pacey chuckled. "Nope. But you could tell me what's going on between us." His eyes watch her face as it changes expressions.

She's serious now. "I think we lost our way for a while. And I loved you so much but we couldn't be together. And I admit, for a while I didn't know all the reasons why we couldn't be together. It didn't make sense. And it just hurt. All I knew was you needed time apart. Away from everything including, perhaps especially, me. But, I think we've come to this stage where things are finally becoming right again. There are so many what ifs and shoulds and should nots and coulds and could nots and maybes. Maybe we shouldn't have had sex together, so soon. And I should have received your message and met you. But I didn't. And maybe things would be different if I had done this in the past or you had done that or circumstances were different. But they're not. But I'm at this point where I know I love you. I can't not love you. You're this huge part of my life. You and Dawson. This cherished, incredible, important part of my life.”

“But the one thing I’ve come to realize through everything that has happened in the past weeks or so is that we can’t go back. We’re too ready to jump to conclusions and incorrect assumptions. We’re too hurt and we just seem to continue hurting one another. Pacey, we’re scarred and the wounds we’ve inflicted upon each other haven’t even begun to heal yet. Getting back together would only be a mistake. So, I guess what I’m saying is I'd like for us to try and be friends again."

"Friends." He repeats contemplatively. He once told her that he didn't think he could be friends with someone he was still in love with. The situation still holds true, but if he wasn't her friend and he wasn't her lover, that leaves him with nothing. Can he deal with being separated from Joey once again risking something very important to him? "Friends," he says again. "I think I can handle that."

She smiles at Pacey and his arm goes around her shoulders and she leans back against him. Maybe it'll be difficult to be friends with someone you're still in love with but at the same time, in these moments, it is the easiest and most logical thing.

*****

The cafe is bustling with people. Hungry people and sleepy, grumpy people who want their caffinated coffee. Pacey shakes his head at the drastic difference between Capeside and Boston. He's seen it before, but sometimes you just can't believe it. Especially after spending the Thanksgiving holiday in the small town.

Thanksgiving was nice. Dinner was delicious. Those days off, though, were also a time for moving on.

"Pacey! I need you in the kitchen A.S.A.P!" Mark calls out.

"Be right there!" Pacey replies putting the finished plates and glasses in a big grey basin. He quickly moves to the kitchen. "What do you need, Mark?"

"Ah, could you help Jimmy here with the breakfast. Lucy can't come in until lunch time."

"Sure, thing."

"Thanks, man. You're a lifesaver."

Yes, Pacey is back in Boston. And his morning has started with a rush of craziness.

Joey walks into The Central. Classes have been canceled and she's got the sudden urge for caffeine. Not to mention that there's something to be said about work loyalties and employees' discounts.

"Joey!" Mark greets. "And what are you doing in this fine establishment today?"

"My class was canceled and I'm in desperate need of some coffee and food."

"Well you've come to the right place. How do pancakes and eggs and sausages sound?"

"Fattening." Joey replies dryly.

"But delicious."

"And poisonous?" Joey banters.

"I'll tell Jim you said that." Mark threatens. Joey just laughs and winks in reply.

Inside the kitchen of The Central, Pacey is having a good time flipping pancakes. Jim watches in amusement as he tends to the sausages, eggs and hash browns.

"I think I may just call you Mr. Flapjacks, Pace. You’re a natural." Jim smiles in amusement.

"Sure feels like it. You know, besides Cookie Crisps, pancakes doused in maple syrup are always my favorite breakfast food. Of course, there should be a side of eggs and sausages." Pacey winks. He pause then wipes his brow, "Man, it's getting hot in here."

"You're in the kitchen. Of course it's going to be hot." Jim laughs.

"At least, the breakfast crowd is lessening at this time. Then we can both have a little breather." Pacey picks up a pancake with a spatula and flips in the air landing back on the grill.

"The service here is terrible." Joey mockingly complains to one of the full-timer waitresses, Kathy, as she waits for her food.

"You think you can do better, Joey?"

"Hell, yes. I make better tips than you."

"That's got nothing to do with your customer service skills and everything to do with the way your hips sway from side to side as you go deliver the orders."

“My hips do not sway side to side!”

“They do so, girl,” Kathy disputes, “Hell, if I had hips like yours I’d be swaying them to and fro, from one end of the earth and to the other. We all got to work with what God has given us. Although, unfortunately, God seems kinder to certain others.” She throws a pointed look at Joey.

“You’re too much, Kath,” chuckles Joey. “And don’t think I haven’t noticed the numerous times some male customer has slipped their number into your pocket.”

“But not as many times as you, sweetie. I saw that blonde you were serving the other day. If you don’t take up his offer then pass him over to me. I’m not shy about hand-me-downs.” Kathy winks.

"So you think I can become a cook, Jim. Maybe try my culinary arts during the next hour or so?" Pacey jokes.

"Well, if you can handle a fryer. Why not? You seem to have the art of the spatula down. Burgers wouldn't be a problem for you."

"Good. Then maybe I can ask Mark for a raise if I become part time cook and busboy. You think he'll go for it?"

"Yeah."

"Really?"

"Yeah. In your dreams." They both laugh knowing Mark is particular when it comes to giving out raises.

"So, what's the hold up?" Joey asks Kathy.

"Jim's letting one of the busboys cook."

"Oh, dear. Tell me it isn't Paul? I swear someone is trying to get me killed."

Kathy just laughs teasingly. "Go see for yourself."

"How many more of these round little dudes do I have to make?" Pacey asks pouring more batter onto the hot grill.

"Just one more stack and that's it. Then you can resume your washing duties." Jim smirks.

"Oh, what fun!" Pacey mocks enthusiasm.

"So get to it, boy."

"Yes, sir." Pace salutes laughing. "Did Mark say why Laura was going to be late?"

"Nope. She probably had a doctor's appointment. She's been under the weather lately."

"Ah. Well, I can always take over for her if she has to stay home. Of course, then I would really have to bargain with Mark for a raise. Y'know, since I'm going out of my dutiful realm as a busboy." Pacey laughs. Jim soon joins in on the laughter.

As Joey approaches the kitchen she hears the familiar booming laugh of The Central’s cook. "Jim! What's the hold up?" Joey teases. "You forgot how to operate the grill again?"

Pacey and Jim both turn around at the sound of the familiar young lady's voice.

"Potter?" Pacey asks surprised by her impromptu entrance.

"Pacey?"

"You two know each other?" Jim looks befuddled between the two.

"Uh, yeah. You could say that." Pacey says.

"Pace, Jim, we still need that order of pancakes out here. Get a ..." Mark trails when he sees his busboy, his cook and his waitress standing motionless in the middle of the kitchen. "What's going on here?"

Joey stares at all three dumbfounded before slowly recovering. "Um, nothing. I was just inquiring about the hold up on breakfast."

"Yeah, and, uh..." Pacey looks at the spatula in his hand and at the grill. He picks up each perfectly round, golden pancakes and puts them on a plate handing it to Jim. "Breakfast is ready as soon as Jim adds the eggs and sausages." Pacey smiles, yet still a little confused by the whole situation. You can tell by the look on his face.

"Oh, okay. I'll go sit down then..." Joey trails off, nods affably to Mark and Jim and then exits the kitchen area.

"Um, what just happened?" Pacey asks shaking his head, not sure about what has just happened. He’s thrown by Joey’s appearance. He remembers her saying she worked here, but they never encountered each other before on the premises. To top it off, they haven’t set eyes on one another since Thanksgiving and a gush of emotion overcomes him.

"Well, you see, Joey came in here to ask if her breakfast was ready and..." Jim begins but is cut off by Pacey shaking his head.

"Pacey, Joey is one of my evening waitresses." Mark supplies. "She came here for breakfast since her class was cancelled."

Pacey is trying to take all this in.

"How do you know Joey? Do you go to school with her?" Mark questions raising an eyebrow.

"Actually, we grew up together. Same group of friends. We, uh..." Pacey hesitates, "we dated."

"Ohhh." Mark and Jim says simultaneously, the whole situation becoming a little bit more clearer.

"Why don't you two go back to work and I'll just take the plate over to her? That is, unless, you want too, Pacey?" Mark asks.

"I guess I can do it. You don't mind if I take a few minutes then, do you?" He takes the plate from Jim.

"No, I don't mind. The crowd has simmered down."

"Thanks, Mark." Pacey exits the kitchen plate in hand.

Joey sits back on her chair contemplating the knowledge that Pacey works here. She doesn't know how she should feel but after a few moments of debate she decides she's being stupid. After all, they're now friends, it doesn't matter if they both work here or not and yet…

"Here's your order, Jo." Pacey slides the holds the plate up to her and then slides it in front of her.

"Thanks. So, you work here?"

"Yeah." Pacey takes a seat opposite her.

"So, how long have you been working here?"

"For a while now," he shrugs. "Since I arrived here."

"Oh. You never mentioned it." She picks up her fork and begins to eat.

"I guess it slipped my mind," he covers up. "Does it bother you that I work here?"

"No." She shakes her head adamantly. "Should it? Does it bother you that I work here?"

"No, it doesn't bother me. Why should it? You're a great person to work alongside with. Besides, I work mornings and then go to the marina after lunch."

"Well, I work the afternoons which is why we've never met before."

"I figured that." He offers a shy smile. "How's your breakfast? Can I get you anything else?"

"No. I'm fine. In fact it's too much." Joey pauses and hands her fork over to Pacey. "Here. Have some, I know you want it and you know I won't be able to finish it all."

"Are you sure? I wouldn't want to mooch off you." He takes the fork and dives right in for the eggs. "Jim sure knows how to make eggs. Mmmmm...." He motions to the pancakes with the fork, "What do you think about the pancakes?"

"They're okay. Not quite as fluffy as Jim makes them. You must have been distracting him." Joey says seriously, hiding the glimmer in her eyes.

"Actually, I made them. Not as fluffy, huh? I'll take that into consideration next time." He bites into his pancakes.

"I was just teasing Pacey. I saw you flipping the pancakes. They're perfectly fine. Just as good as Jim's."

Pacey smiles gratefully. "So, what are your plans for the day?"

"Well, class was canceled and I have nothing for a while. So, I was thinking of going to the library or something."

"Sounds fun." He deadpans. "I, on the other hand, have a meeting with the my boss at the marina. It's getting cold to be working outside now. He may have something else for me to do, hopefully."

"What? This gorgeous weather doesn't agree with you? I mean the sun is shining! How can it be that cold?"

"Jo, next week is the first week of December."

"Really?" Joey widens her eyes in a faux bimbo expression. "Wow, Pacey. You're so smart."

"Ha ha, Potter. I just hope this means I'm not on an extended vacation during the winter." Pacey sighs. "But who knows, he may have a job in waiting for me."

"Pacey, I'm sure everything will work out beautifully."

"We'll find out soon enough." Pacey laughs. "I'm not too worried though."

"Good. So...how have things been? I haven't really seen you since Thanksgiving."

"Well, in those few days you haven't seen me, I've just kept myself busy with work. That's about it. When I get home, I'm pretty tired. Patrick will come over to hang out. That's about it. You?"

"Mainly school. Getting back into everything. Nothing that interesting, although Val has it in her head to drag me to as many frat parties as possible."

"It's only been like a week. How many frat parties were there?"

"Too many." Joey sighs.

Pacey laughs. "Have you gone to many parties?"

"Two so far. And that's two too many."

"You were never one to hold your alcohol down. You're taking care of yourself, right?" Pacey asks concerned. He knows how she can act when she's drunk.

"Yes, dad." Joey rolls her eyes. "I haven't been drinking. Well not much..."

"Just be careful, ok, Jo."

"I'll be fine. I have Val and another friend, JD, looking out for me. Besides it's not like anything would happen."

"JD?" Pacey questions. He recalls the name from when they first talked at Starbucks. She had to leave and meet a JD at the library. "I haven't met her have I?"

Joey breaks out in a peal of laughter. "No, you haven't met her, especially considering that JD is a guy, not a girl."

"Oh," Pacey has been hoping it was a girl. He can't but feel a tinge of jealousy even though they have agreed to be friends. "A guy, huh?"

"Yeah. He's a great guy. You two should meet. I think you'd both get along really well."

"Yeah. Maybe one day. Listen, I better get back to work." Pacey begins to get up. He hears that JD is a guy and a guy that spends time with Joey. That's all he needs to hear before he gets any more jealous. "I believe the meal is on the house."

"Really? Mark is usually more tight with giving freebies?" Joey pauses, bites her lower lip then blurts out, "So, um, Val's dragging me to another party tonight. Do you want to come?"

"What time's the party?" He asks.

"Around 9:45pm."

"What kind of party?" He inquires further.

"Another frat party. Val has a thing for Frat boys."

"I didn't think Worthington was frat party central. Just how many frat houses are there? Or does she venture out of Worthington?"

"There are several at Worthington. More than you'd believe and sometimes Val goes off-campus and drags me along, if I can't get out of it."

"Ahh, well, I guess I can go."

"Okay. So I'll see you around 9:45pm at the dorms?"

"Sure, Jo. I gotta go. I'll see you tonight." He turns and walks away toward the kitchen.

Sitting alone on the table once more, Joey lets out a whoosh of breath. She supposes everything has gone very well. Better than expected. The first conversation since they’ve decided to be friends and only friends. Definitely better than expected and yet she feels a certain empty hollowness in her stomach. She chalks it up to hunger and attempts to finish the rest of her meal.

*****

"So, how do I look?" Joey asks Val for the fifth time.

"You look perfectly fine. I've told you that already, Joey."

"Are you sure? I don't like the way my hair is..."

Val steps forward and removes Joey's hands from her hair. "It's just me, Jordan and Pacey. Unless you're planning on impressing some frat boy?"

Joey scoffs at the notion. "Please, Val. I have some standards." She doesn’t want to think about the person she wants to impress.

"Then why are you obsessing? It's just Pacey. He's just your friend now. So it shouldn't matter. Or should it?"

"We're just friends." Joey states firmly. "And it means nothing."

"Knock, knock," Pacey says as he comes into the girls' room. They have left it ajar. At the dorms you can leave the doors open at times so random students and friends can walk in and out. "Are we ready to par-tay?"

They nod in acquiesce as Jordan magically appears right after Pacey and after the introductions are made, they all set off to the party.

The frat house is loud. Music is blaring. The huge bass speakers are positioned at the corners of the bottom floor. Smoke and the distinct smell of alcohol is in the musty air. Pacey, Joey, Val and JD make their way through the crowd. Pacey scans the place looking for what he isn't sure. His eyes come upon two familiar girls. "Hey, I see some people I know. I'll be right back." He tells them and then walks away.

"Dannie?" Pacey taps the girl on the shoulder.

"Pacey! Hey! What are you doing here? I didn't figure you for the frat type. Otherwise I would have asked you to join us." Dannie claims as she gives Pacey a peck on the cheek. "You remember Rinny, don't you?"

"Ah, yes, Erin, if I recall. Nice to see you again." He extends his hand and a smile to the other girl.

"You, too." Erin looks him over. She really never did get a good look at him when they first met. He is a good-looking guy. Sexy. That is the word to describe him. He looks like the perfect man. Looks. That's all Erin knows of him so far. Dannie never really talks about her seafaring friend. "You look good." She smiles, her eyes obviously in flirtation mode.

"Thanks." Pacey looks over the crowd. "I actually came with some people. You might know one of them Dannie." Pacey hints.

"Oh, really? So do I get to meet them?"

"Yeah, if I can find them. I think I lost them in this monstrosity of a party." Pacey laughs.

Joey sees Pacey flirting with two girls - one blonde and one brunette. They're tall, slim and beautiful with the look of privilege written all over them. She notices how familiar Pacey seems to be with both and the brunette is definitely flirting with Pacey. In his eye she notes a small spark of interest - animal attraction or lust or whatever you want to call it.

"I don't care." Joey mutters to herself as she accepts a glass of red jelly shooters. "I don't care." She mutters again as she downs another.

Jordan shoots her a worried look. "I think two's your limit Joey."

Instead she shoots him a scathing look and pushes pass him bumping into some beefy, pumped jock. The jock eyes Joey like a juicy prime steak and she accepts his offer to dance.

"I thought she was over this guy." Jordan mutters worriedly at Val. "I'm going to intervene."

Val shakes her head. "I think she's finally having some fun. Let her be. Besides isn't that your friend Mea? With Bradley Walters the Fifth?"

Jordan's eyes narrow and he stalks over to the corner of the room, willing himself not to punch Bradley Walters the Fifth in the face.

Pacey and Dannie and Erin continue to babble about. Every so often they take sips of their beer. Pacey's eyes drift to the dance floor. He sees Joey dancing with some guy. Some musclebound idiot who can't dance for shit.

Dannie can see the look in Pacey's eyes. She nudges Erin to take him on the dance floor and show him a good time. 'If Joey can have a good time then so can Pacey,' she considers.

Erin looks at her. Glad she’s been nudged to make a move. This is her time to get her hands on Pacey. She steps forward closer to him. "Would you like to dance?"

"I'm not really a good dancer." Pacey states.

"Neither are any of these buffoons. Look at them. I'm sure whatever crazy moves you have you'll blend right in." All three laugh at her attempt to get him to dance.

"Sure, why not. But if I step on your toes, don't complain." Pacey warns.

"I won't." She says as she pulls him onto the crowded living room area, which seemed to be designated as the dance floor. Small and crowded. They push their way in and start to dance with whatever room they have to do so.

From the corner of her eye Joey sees Pacey moving to the dance floor with the brunette. The brunette's hands wander all over Pacey's body and Joey bites her lip hard and turns her head. His hands are resting on her hips and he’s leaning in and whispering things in her ear.

Joey feels sick.

She excuses herself and the beefy hulk follows, not that Joey pays any attention to him. She's trying to get as far away as possible. She searches for JD or Val but finds them occupied and decides to leave the party by herself.

Pacey slows his movements. He puts his hands on Erin's to stop any further movement on her part. He has seen her walk out. He also saw the dumb jock follow her. He wants to make sure everything is alright, that she is safe.

"I just need to go check on someone. I'll be right back." He tells her and makes his way towards the door of the frat house. He looks around to see the direction Joey went. He sees her retreating figure by the corner of the street and runs up to her brushing past the drunken guy teetering behind her.

"Jo?" He says as he grasps her arm.

"What?" Joey snaps.

"Are you okay? Why are you leaving?"

"I'm fine. I just felt tired so I'm leaving. Why don't you go back to your friends?" She tries to sound as normal as possible. She tries to pretend that it doesn't hurt to see him with someone else; to know what she invited him and he'd rather spend time with his new girlfriend? Slut? It's a reality she hasn't prepared for and now it comes crashing down on her.

"Let me walk you home?" He asks quietly.

"Not necessary. Go back to the party. Have fun."

"C'mon, Jo. It's late and you've had a couple of drinks. Let me walk you home." He insists.

"No, thank you." Joey replies primly. "I wouldn't want to take you away from your friends."

"You wouldn't be. And, Joey, you are my friend."

And he is so calm about it. So nonchalant. And maybe that is what hurts the most. Joey gives Pacey a small, weak smile. "Friends. After all it's what I wanted. What we both wanted."

"Yeah." His voice a whisper. "What we both wanted." Though, there is a tinge of unsureness in his voice.

“I’m fine, Pacey.” This time her voice is steady although a little bit sad. They’re standing opposite one another in the middle of Worthington’s lush lawns, the sounds of the frat party distant but persistent in the background, with only friendship between them. It would be foolish and wrong to want more now although letting go is one of the hardest things. “Go have a good time with your friends.” The brunette, Joey adds silently. And there isn’t a single bit of maliciousness in her voice, only sincere honesty.

Maybe when she’ll get home she’ll cry a little, probably a lot. She may mope around for weeks. But as awful as it feels and will feel, it also feels right. So she smiles and pushes Pacey back towards the party, towards the brunette and a separate life without her though they will remain friends. As he walks off, she too turns and walks away. Separation. And the gap between them widens. Unknown.