I woke up this morning in a really good mood. Considering I was in the van, in the middle of a trailer park in who-knows-where-the-fuck Nova Scotia, I was feeling great. Pete and I went into the trailer to round up Randy and Darren so we could hit the road and start the daily ritual. Before we left, two of the girls that made friends with Randy -Diandra and Jessica- both phoned the trailer to say their goodbyes to him. Diandra later became a Girl Of Grayline. We loaded up and headed for Moncton. I think my exceptionally great mood was due to the fact that this night we would be rocking at a bar called 53rd & 3rd. Judging by the name alone I felt it was going to be a cool venue. Before we got too far we had to stop for gas. It was then that we realized we had just spent a night in a trailer park with lots of drugs, booze, underage girls and some serious partying going on. Hell, the host was just 'house sitting' and didn't even live there. The point of all this? The place was called Bible Hill. Ironic, don't ya think...
As we pulled into downtown Moncton it seemed like a really awesome place. Really clean and lot's of interesting stores and architecture. It was the coolest area out east that I had seen yet and there was an unusual buzz of life for a Thursday afternoon here. We pulled the van up to the bar which was right in the heart of the city only to realize that it was closed. It was all good though, since we wanted to roam around for a while and yes folks, today was the day that I was going to do my own laundry for the first time in my 26 years (with a little help from my friends)!!!
Our first stop in our walking tour of Moncton was at Full Blast, the local indy record shop. It was small, dusty and had lots of cool stuff, just the way we like our record stores to be. Pete became extremely happy as he found a rare piece of Canadian vinyl that he had been searching for for a long time. We talked to the owner of the shop who gave us some good news and some bad news. The good news was that he was going to buy some of the AMP Records stuff that we were carrying around plus our Incinerator cd to put in his store, and the bad news was that he had not seen any promotion for the show tonight at all. This lack of promo thing was becoming a common theme for all of the shows that we had played so far. The only reason we can criticize is that when we put on a show in London, trust me, it is very well advertised. I'm talking 1000 posters, radio interviews, newspaper promos. The only poster for this show in Moncton that we saw was on the door in the bar we were playing at. Oh well, such is life and we were here to rock regardless.
Darren, Randy and I decided to walk down to a skate shop and check it out while doing some of our own advertising. Pete went off to do his own thing since he didn't feel like going for the hike, as he figures, he paid good money for his van so why the hell would he walk if he didn't have to. It does make sense. We got to the skate shop and the owners bought a CD, and Darren and I each bought 3 quarter sleeve shirts as stage wear. The show tonight was 19 and up so we asked for directions to the skate park as we figured we could probably make some more sales there. On our way back to find Pete we ended up in a porn shop/rub and tug... er, sorry, adult movie store and spa. We walked up to the stairs to the spa and Randy knocked on the door which was answered by this not so nice looking middle aged lady in a Gap shirt.
"Hi there, just passing through and we were wondering what the deal is, or prices are or whatever the hell goes on up here." Randy said with a huge smile on his face. It was kind of funny because Darren and I were about 4 steps below Randy and it felt like we were little kids about to get in trouble. Big trouble.
"Well it's $115 an hour and $150 for a Turkish shower," she replied, and on that note we were outta there. First off, I don't care how desperate you are or how bloated your balls might be, for $115-150 you better get a "massuesse" who is at least good looking. Secondly, what in the blue hell is a Turkish shower?!! In all the learning channel shows I've seen on Turkey, the Turkish shower was some poor guy getting the shit kicked out of him by two huge guys with mustaches. Well, needless to say, the Turkish shower in Moncton will remain a mystery.
Our next stop was at a tattoo shop were we sold another CD to a 16 year old girl who was having her bellybutton pierced. I was starting to realize that it was easier to sell CD's on the street than at our shows (go figure). We eventually found Pete sitting beside the van reading some books that he had picked up in some used bookstore.
Well the moment of truth had finally arrived. No, not the show, the laundry mat!! Yes it is true... my mom and my girlfriend are the only people who have ever done my laundry. Go ahead, say it... spoiled, baby, loser, mamas boy, I don't care - call me what you want just don't ask me to do my own laundry!! To tell you the truth it was easy and painless. I just put this white powder Darren gave me into the machine with my clothes, pushed a button and WANGO! Go figure it was that easy. And all these years I avoided it like the plague....
The only thing missing from when my clothes usually get washed was fabric softener but when Pete said "fabric softener is for sissies!" I decided I could go a few days without my stuff smelling so nice. I looked over at Randy who was rummaging though his stuff and he was really pissed off.
He had just realized he left his freaky contacts ($120) a Shorty's t-shirt ($35) and a pair of jeans ($60) at the trailer park in Bible Hill (priceless). Darren and I tried to make him feel better as Pete just sat back nodding his head the way only Pete can. Randy called Diandra and she told him that Erik had found his stuff and they would somehow get it back to him.
We found some dinner and popped into an "alternative" clothing store where I bought a studded bracelet, Darren bought nut hugging black pants and Randy got skin tight girls pants with sparkels and flames at the bottom. When Darren and Randy first came out of the dressing room they looked a bit like same sex dancers but I realized that if they wore those clothes on stage they'd look great.
We sold yet another CD to some kids on the street (hey little girl, wanna buy a cd?) and it was time to load our stuff into the bar. I HATE THIS. My body is not built for heavy lifting. As we carried our stuff into the bar I realized that this was my kind of place. KISS - BEATLES - OZZY dolls decorated the walls as well as Black Sabbath and Kiss posters all around. We met the guys from Hope who had set up the show and they seemed very cool. There were three bands playing tonight. Hope sound checked and I really liked their sound. They were by far the best band since Mr. Machete that we got to play with. I was really excited because I knew we would sound good together. Darren, Randy and I got decked out in our Rock Gear, leather pants, flamed pants, studded belts and bracelets, black shirts...yeah, we looked like a rock band. I LOVE IT! We decided to go for a beer in out attire and received a lot of interesting looks. We sold one more CD on the street while we made our way to the skate park but the visit was short lived since there were a million bugs invading the area.
Hope went on first and they played a great set. They didn't have much energy on stage but their tunes kicked ass. The Dean Malenkos showed up 5 minutes before we were going to go on and they wanted to play next. These guys really rocked! Their drummer, Johnny Horseface, had a wicked pornstar mustache - maybe he was working the Turkish shower. They also played a kick ass set, they may have been the best band we played with on tour. Great banter between songs and a tune called "I don't wanna come on your face". Their guitarist was a beast!! His fingers were lighting fire to the strings. I was really impressed. Showtime again and we were DRESSED TO KILL!! We rocked really hard that night and the few that stayed to watch seemed to agree. They all raised their hands in a rock'n'roll salute as we formed our pyramid in Class of 85. When we finished the Malenkos told us how much they liked our show. The one guys girlfriend told us that there is no other band that puts on such a high energy visual display in the Marritimes and she loved it.
We packed up and Dana from Hope was kind enough to let us stay at his place that night. Darren got in the shower first and took an unusually long shower that night. When he came out he had a huge satisfied smile on his face... I was next and needless to say, I thoroughly rinsed the tub before i got in for my shower. From now on Darren would shower last.
So another night had come and gone and I was taking my rest on a couch curled up in my sleeping bag. I pondered the experiences I have had and all the people I had met so far on this trip. The places I had never been before I now have fond memories of and the bonding with three of my good friends over a two week period. I knew that I would learn one of life's most valuable lessons during our tour, and it had come to me on this day. My whole life would now change because of it. I really felt I had grown as person today. What is the life altering experience you ask... I now have the power to clean my own clothes. |
