|A Little Girl's Pain|
This abuse went on till I was 8, and because I was so sure I'd been caught doing "bad things", I never went back to the house. Kris & his famiy moved away shortly after that.
I basically lost it and no one could figure out why.
|April 5, (2001 OR 2002 - not sure)
My family and I went out to see a "concert in the park" thing. I got bored an went wondering around this huge park. This car drove up, and mosty because I wasn't completely sane, I got in.
He raped me.
Then I went wondering around the park for a while in a kinda dazed state. When I got home, and a few days passed, I freaked out in a major flashback kinda way.
My mom called the police on me and I told them what happened. As usual, my mom decided it was best not to press charges. She didn't believe me.
When I realized that this had happened mostly because I wasn't sane enough to think things through, and that my own mother didn't believe me because of my insanity,
I decided to "get better".
Which lasted all of about two years before I started sliping.
There's some things going on that I'd rather not mention for my own safety, but for the most part, things are okay. I get really deppressed sometimes... yeah ... most of the time and I'm failing ALL my classes. I just got out of a psych ward for the fist time since the incident in the park.
Things are actually looking pretty grim. I
guess I just need something to hold on to.
I really don't know anymore.
All I know is that I'm just too tired...
Even though most of the pain should be gone.