Wandham are what Mr Todd terms an "annoying side." They’re a pleasant enough bunch, though they don’t mix much after the game, but their attack is completely one-dimensional. So much so that a half-decent batting side should as a matter of course bat them out of the game by posting a total beyond reach even of their admittedly strong top six, or chase easily any target. However, such speculation was irrelevant here as, beset by major Bank Holiday availability problems, Wandham were a shambles. Their organiser phoned on Saturday night to give the news that they only had eight players. Six turned up. Two kids, Heald and Hodson, were co-opted from a knockabout in the park and the flexible Kitan Patel (by a mile their best bowler on the day) was loaned out. After a period of umming and ahhing due to the rain, the game went ahead, thirty overs a side, although Mr Ashton was somewhat reluctant.

The Gents learned little new in Wandham’s innings. Mike will destroy average bowling and here posted the club’s highest innings since 1996. With Jim Wright, in a stand notable for superb running between the wickets (and helped by gaps aplenty), 98 runs came in 15 overs before Jim clipped Kitan’s first ball to mid-on. Dhruv, bowled head in the air driving, Ashton, top-edging a high full-toss toss to backward square-leg and the hungover Graham, clipping low back to Carbro, soon fell but Mike went on and on, striking eleven fours before playing on. Swiss (undone by a ball "even better than the one McGrath got Lara with this morning") and Gav were not long for their innings but the seventeen year-old Dhruv Desai and Snarler batted sensibly to post 22 more runs. Victor lost the plot with the scoring (blaming the "new book"), 173 runs being agreed upon after a call on the mobile to the ECB. It was hard to control the match ball, which now resembled a peach, but Kitan was pleased with his entry into the ante-room of the Oppo Bowling Hall of Fame.

The players turned straight round in the gloom. With Mike knackered out, Masher did the gloves for the first time ever (and we never heard the end of his three dismissals in the Black Lion). In a bizarre piece of delegation, Snarler was made Captain for the Second Innings and he won the game with his decision to bowl the Dhruvs through. Young Desai was accurate and Mr Patel mesmeric on a turning wicket. Tupling and the dangerous Carbro both clipped high to silly mid-on Victor, two fine catches and Wandham well behind the rate. Desai did his leg in his final over, completed by Swiss Tony, who, staying on, then had Wardle nudging the outswinger to Ashton. All was up then and Snarler gave the support bowlers a go. Andy had Hodson well stumped Ball Two, but thereafter lost his line. No matter, as Victor then had the southpaw Gizauskas caught behind. The fielding was pretty good, although a few catches were spilled, and Gavin’s underarm throw outed the promising youngster Heald. Snarler, bowling off a few paces, got one to lift, taking Abdul’s gloves into Dhruv’s safe hands running in from cover and Jim concluded proceedings by bowling Kitan, without whose sterling all round efforts Wandham would have been completely humiliated. The soaked players tucked into Dhruv’s tasty toasted vegetable curry sarnies, towelled down and were in the pub by six-thirty.

Was it worth it? Most players thought so, if only because everybody had a bat or a bowl, although individual achievements may have been devalued by the nature of the opposition. Wandham CC have been playing since 1965, although they have come close to folding once or twice, and the likes of Tupling and Carrington have played hundreds of games for them. They admitted that they had only five "definites" for their next game, in which case they should go on a recruitment drive pronto. The Gents are lucky in that respect, being able to call on Enterprise, FC Chad or the amazing Mr Patel to come up with the goods when short. The fact remains, however, that to turn up to any game with six players is disgraceful.

In the Black Lion, Mr Ashton, on top form, fired off to the editor of The Gent a tough set of questions. These included "Right, mate, who’s got the most catches for us this season?" and "Now look ‘ere Brooms, who got the first Gents stumping since 1997?" both followed by that little self-satisfied nod of his. The Great Man beefily professed his labours behind the timbers to have been "bloody good fun" and hinted he would like to do it again. Unable to pick Dhruv, he did cope well though with the Snelling leg-side onslaught and conceded only four byes, the fewest since, well, sorry, Masher, April 1999.

His mood was doubtless improved by the Gents’ third successive win, which put the season’s record at 3-3. Defer judgment until September but 1999 already has a better feel about it than the trials of a year ago, helped by the return of Masher and Jim, who just ooze confidence, and the increased presence of Mr Hughes.