"Aileen, what's wrong? You look like you saw a ghost!" Kevin tried to get her to look at him.

"Kevin? What do you remember about.....about....what went on that night?" She was still looking over her shoulder trying to get Brian's attention.

"Well, not much, it's all kinda fuzzy. I remember they tied you up, Nick was in there, AJ....I think. I don't know."

Aileen look relieved for a moment and then shook her head. No, she couldn't keep this from him, she had to tell him sometime.

Finally, Brian sauntered over. "Aileen, do you need a drive home? The nurse has been in again bugging us to get lost!"

She smiled at him gratefully. "No Brian, I'm okay, but thanks for asking. Kevin, we'll talk tomorrow okay? You need you're rest right now." She leaned over, gave him a kiss and gathered her things together. She never saw the wondering look in his eyes.

The car had been sitting outside of the house for twenty minutes. Inside, Aileen tried to find a way to talk herself into going to the front door. "C'mon, at the very least, he should know that Kevin is awake and going to be fine." she nodded to herself. "You've got to talk to him sometime, you've got to make a start." She smiled grimly. "It's so easy when YOU say it." She got out of the car and headed up the sidewalk.

She found him on the back deck, sprawled out on a lounge chair. The bandage was still in place and curiously, so was the blood. "Why would they release him with that much blood still coming from an injury like he suffered?" she wondered. He had been drawing again, she noticed, his pad was open and lying beside him. As she got closer to him, she cleared her throat. Nick looked up, startled and quickly slammed the book shut.

"What's up?" he asked.

"Great news, Nick! Kevin woke up this afternoon! He's doing really well, sitting up already and talking. The doctor thinks he'll be allowed to go home soon, he's doing so well!" Aileen smiled at him. "C'mon, Nick." she thought "Give me a reaction, give me something."

"That's great!" Nick said weakly. "Really good to hear." His face looked troubled. "Does he know yet?"

"No, not yet." Aileen said. "He did ask me why you were in his room at the hospital, but he doesn't seem to remember much about the incident yet."

Nick looked up at her then, his lower lip was quivering and large tears in his eyes were just on the verge of falling. "'Leen how can you stand to be around me? Why do you keep coming to see me? I'm a terrible person."

"No you're not, Nick." she said soothingly.

He nodded. "A part of me wanted Kevin to die, so he'd never find out."

"Nick, you didn't really want him to die, did you?" she questioned. "You've got to realize this, Nick. I forgive you, Kevin will forgive you, you're not to blame. Understand?" Aileen looked at him across from her. "Who do you think Kevin is going to hate more - you or those bastards? You've got to forgive yourself, and then move on, it's the only way."

He burst into tears. "Aileen, this is so unfair, everything is so unfair, why couldn't I have just died and been done with this!"

She moved over and hugged him tight. "Nick, what's unfair? Tell me, we can work something out." She could feel his tears soaking the shoulder of her shirt. His shoulders were shaking.

"I can't "Leen. I can't ever tell you."

"Oh God." she thought to herself. "This is not going to get any easier." She rocked him, rubbed his back and whipered soothing words to him until they both fell asleep to the sound of his tears.