"Daddy!"

Andrew tossed his covers back and jumped off the bed, hugging his father’s legs tightly.

"Moma wakes up, not Daddy."

"I know." Nick frowned again and then smiled down at Tigger. "Mommy’s still sleeping, do you want to have a good breakfast and then go down to the beach with Daddy?"

"Yay!" Andrew jumped up and down excitedly. "Dress me, Daddy." Andrew pulled open the drawer and tossed a shirt out.

"What colour is it?" Nick asked.

"Boo." Andrew giggled.

Nick laughed. "Okay, you need blue or white shorts, okay? Can you get those?"

Andrew rummaged some more and held a small pair of white shorts aloft proudly. "White!"

Nick helped Andrew out of his pajamas and into his clean clothes. "Now breakfast. How about some cereal?"

"Yum!" Andrew rubbed his tummy and then took Nick’s hand. "Let’s go!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kathy awoke with a yawn. She stretched and noticed Nick was not in bed. "What time is it?" she mumbled to herself, grabbing the clock. "Oh Jesus, 11am? Why on earth did Nick let me sleep this long?" She grabbed a shirt and a pair of shorts and hurriedly dressed. "Morning Nick, why did you let me sleep in for so long?" Her words died in her mouth as she realized Nick wasn’t in the living room. "Where are you guys?" She tried to smile, even as she felt panic setting in. A complete check of the house turned up nothing, except the dirty breakfast dishes and Andrew’s pajamas in a heap on the floor of his bedroom. "The beach." Kathy muttered to herself. "He wouldn’t take him down to the beach again?" She ran down the steps to the beach and jogged down the stretch of sand, willing them to appear before her. Suddenly she heard Andrew giggling behind her and she whirled around. Nick was walking towards her with Andrew on his shoulders. Andrew would giggle each time Nick swayed or bounced in the air.

"Hi Moma!" Andrew shouted. "Look at me!"

Kathy tried to smile. "Oh Andrew, thank God you are alright!" Nick set their son down and Kathy gathered Andrew in a tight hug. "I was so worried."

Nick frowned. "I take good care of Tig, Kathy. We kept our shoes on this time."

"You should have let me know you were going out." Kathy whispered, as Andrew ran circles around them, hollering with glee.

"Why? So you could follow us and make sure I didn’t touch him? He’s my son too Kathy!"

"Keep your voice down, Nick! We are not going to argue in front of Tigger."

She bent down to her knees and grabbed Andrew as he passed by. "Mommy has to go to the grocery store Tig. Want to come?"

Nick sat down in the sand and suddenly felt Andrew fall into his lap.

"I wanna stay with Daddy!" Andrew protested.

"But you love the grocery store." Kathy prodded.

"Daddy fun. I wanna stay with Daddy!" Andrew clung to Nick’s neck.

"I think Daddy is busy, love. You come with me and we’ll get a treat."

"No!" Andrew held on tighter to his father. "I don wanna! I wanna stay wif Daddy!"

"Andrew Aaron, you are coming with me to the store, let’s go!" Kathy plucked a kicking and screaming Andrew away from Nick.

"No! I don wanna!" Andrew screamed as Kathy walked away. "Daddy!"

Nick continued to sit in the sand, the warm sun beating down on him until he heard Kathy slam the van door’s shut and drive out of the garage. He got to his feet and made his way to the house slowly. He slid the glass door shut, noticing that Kathy had left it open in her haste to find them. Nick sat down at the kitchen table and felt a tear trickle down his cheek. "He’s my son too." he whispered to the empty room. His fingers searched the table until they came in contact with a juice glass. He picked it up, rolling it in his hands before letting it drop to the floor. "He’s my son too, dammit!" Nick slammed his fist down on the table. He made his way to the front door, grabbing his cane along the way. "Let’s see if she cares if I’m gone." Nick pulled his sunglasses on and slammed the door shut behind him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alexa wandered slowly down the hallway. As long as she'd been back in the house, she still hadn't been able to tell AJ about what happened with Nick. She'd tried, but she just couldn't go through with it. She knew she wasn't acting normally, but she also knew AJ assumed the change in her behavior was because of what he'd done. He was being so good to her, trying to make everything right, it just made it harder to tell him. And the longer she waited, the harder it got.

She was learning to relish the time she spent at the clinic because she rarely had time to think about everything else that was going on in her life. Even there though, she had to deal with Taylor, who she hadn't been able to confide in, and she doubted she ever would. Probably because it seemed less real if she told fewer people. As if somehow she could make the whole thing go away by not thinking about it.

She sighed, turning the corner to see AJ sitting haphazard in a chair. She pasted a bit of a smile on her face as he spotted her. "Hey baby," he beckoned to her, and then pulled her down to sit beside him when she got near. He sighed against her shoulder, as he wrapped his arms around her. "I missed you."

"I was only gone ten minutes." Alexa couldn't relax. She felt like she needed to stay on guard, because she just couldn't forget.

"Doesn't matter," he placed a line of kisses along her neck and shoulder, making her shiver. She couldn't control that reaction.

When the doorbell rang, she heard AJ groan. "I'll get it," she unwrapped his arms and got up. "Be right back." She glanced out the window by the door, and then took a look behind her before opening it. "Hi Nick." Her voice was emotionless.

"Alexa?" Nick's face was blank as he tried to orient himself. "I didn't expect you. I didn't know you'd come back." There was a bit of puzzlement in his voice that Alexa understood.

"I'm here."

Nick reached out and finding Alexa pulled her into a hug. "Oh my god, I'm so relieved. I'm so glad AJ took it better than Kathy did."

Alexa struggled against the hug trying to shush Nick. "Nicky, no. I haven't ..."

"Haven't what?" Alexa closed her eyes at the sound of AJ's voice in the hall. "What did I take better than Kathy, Nick?"

Nick's face grew pale as he realized what was going on. "Oh my God." His voice was so soft that Alexa barely caught the words. "I'm so sorry, Lex." He hadn't known she hadn't told AJ yet. In fact he'd assumed they'd gotten past it, since she'd obviously moved back in.

Alexa sought eye contact with AJ. She knew she had to tell him now; the conclusions he was drawing were as bad or worse than the truth anyway, if there was anything worse than the truth. How to begin.

First she turned to Nick, "Go home, Nicky. I can handle this."

"No!" The word was far stronger than Alexa expected. "You came to Kathy with me. I'm staying."

"Staying for what? What the hell is going on?"

Alexa cringed at AJ's question, but she needed Nick to go before she explained. "Nick, I'm asking you. Please go home to your wife." Her tone pleaded with him, as much as her eyes would have if he could have seen them. She knew that by staying, it would only make his own situation worse. "I'll be fine, Nick. Go home."

Nick finally nodded wordlessly, and turned his back, walking back out the door he'd come in. Neither AJ or Alexa spoke until he was out of sight. "What the fuck is going on, Alexa?"

Alexa took a deep breath trying to stop herself from breaking down. She knew she had to somehow tell him the whole story, if he'd listen to it. "That night that I left you, I needed someone. Just to talk to. Nick called me, he needed somebody too. We went out for dinner, had a few drinks." She didn't know what to say. She couldn't actually spell out what had happened; if she did that she'd actually have to admit it to herself for good. "It just happened. Neither of us wanted it, really." She tried to keep all emotion out of her voice, almost as if it had happened to someone else.

She saw AJ's eyes blaze as he realized what she wasn't saying. "I warned Nick. I thought once he was married ..."

"No!" The thought of AJ blaming Nick for what happened upset her more than taking the blame herself. "Don't blame him. It's my fault. I used him. I wanted to know why." She took a deep breath, and then said very calmly, very quietly, "I wanted to make you see how it hurts." The reality hit Alexa as she said it. The reason she'd let it happen. She wanted to hurt him, the way he'd hurt her.

"God damn, Alexa. Why Nick? Why not someone faceless, that you'd never have to see again? That I'd never have to see at all. Why Nick?" Alexa had no answer; she finally felt tears running down her face when AJ turned his back on her. He ran one hand through his hair, and then gripped his neck, "I've gotta go out. I'll be back."

"I'll get some things and be gone when you get back." Alexa thought that was probably the best thing.

"Be here when I get back."

"What?" Alexa couldn't have heard him right.

"Don't go anywhere." With that he walked out the door, leaving Alexa standing alone, more confused than she'd been before.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When AJ returned, Alexa was seated motionless at the table, her hands folded together on the tabletop.

"What's with the bag at the door?" Alexa had wondered if he'd notice it. She'd packed up enough stuff for the week, and stuffed it into the duffle bag, dropping it at the door. It had taken all her strength to make herself stay until he came back. But she figured she owed him that much.

She stood, continuing to avoid looking at him. "I'm leaving. I'll get the rest of my stuff later, when you're not here." She finally looked up, "I moved it all to the guest room so you don't have to deal with it." She took a few steps to the door, thinking there was nothing else left to say.

"Wait." He reached out to touch her arm and then stopped, realizing what he was doing, and let his arm fall back to his side. "We've gotta talk about this." Alexa stared intently at the floor for a minute, and then she turned slowly, sitting back in the chair she'd just left. Rubbing one hand across his eyes, AJ leaned heavily on the chair across from her, but he didn't sit down. Alexa knew he'd be pacing shortly. "This is fucked up, Alexa."

"It's been fucked up for a while, Alex. We just haven't been paying attention." She unconsciously spun her ring around on her finger. She was intending to give it back to him before she left.

"We were good for a while, what happened?" AJ's shoulders were slumped as he stared down at the table. Neither of them was willing to look at the other.

Alexa shrugged, "You tell me. You're the one getting drunk and sleeping around." The words were out of her mouth before she thought.

AJ's head snapped up, his eyes locking with hers. "Don't blame me for all this! You slept with NICK!" She covered her face with her hands, and slumped lower in her chair. She knew what she'd done was just as bad or worse than him. But she also knew it would never have happened if ... "Alexa," AJ's voice interrupted her, "Why the hell did it have to be Nick? I knew you were attracted to him, it was obvious. But it never occurred to me that you'd actually... " His fingers drummed anxiously on the back of the chair.

"Why do you choose any of the girls you've been with, Alex?" He looked at her strangely. "Yes, I know there were more than just this last time. I'm not completely oblivious." He swung the chair around and sat backwards on it, his head landing hard on his arms crossed across the back. She continued with an explanation. "Nick was convenient, and comfortable. There's no other reason. It's not in my nature to go looking for a one night stand, especially not just to get back at you. It's not as if Nick and I planned this. It just happened." She stopped to look at him, as he raised his head. "All I wanted was somebody to talk to."

"You could have talked to Taylor." His voice was flat.

"Taylor defends you for everything. You can do no wrong. She's the main reason I've been around for this long. She always has an excuse or an explanation for you that makes me think that everything is okay. I didn't need that. I needed somebody who understood what an asshole you could be. Nick knows you. Probably better than I do." While she'd been talking, she'd slid the ring off her finger, and trapped it against the table. "Kathy and him were having some trouble too, I guess. It was just the wrong time for both of us. For all of us." She sighed, and slid the ring back and forth on the table, listening to the sound it made.

When AJ didn't say anything, Alexa stood. She picked up the ring and looked at it for a second before putting it down on the table directly in front of him. "I'll get the rest of my stuff by the end of the week." She started for the door.

"Where are you going?" He'd picked up the ring, and was looking at it, as he asked the question.

"Taylor's, for now." She didn't want to go to Taylor's, but she couldn't handle the thought of a hotel room, even at a different hotel. Not after the last time. "I shouldn't have given up my apartment." It was hard pretending she didn't want him to ask her to stay. Part of her wanted him to tell her it was all going to be fine, and that she could just stay there. But the realistic part of her knew that wasn't the way it could be. Not this time. She needed time to think and get rid of her own guilt.

"You could stay here. Until you find somewhere else." His voice was low, almost as if he wasn't sure he should say the words. He made no move to look at her. They were the words she'd hoped to hear, but she knew they were just words right now. It made it easier for Alexa to stick to her decision.

"I can't stay here. I shouldn't have come back. It's not fair to either of us. We both need time to think about this. I can't do that if I'm living in your house."

"Our house." He'd turned to look at her, and Alexa extended her arm to touch his face. He lifted his own hand slowly, covering hers with it.

"It's your house, Alex. There's too much of you here. If there's any chance of us working this out, I can't be here." She pulled her hand away and walked to where she'd dropped the duffle bag. As she picked it up, she knew AJ had followed her. She walked to the door, and then sighed, turning to face him. She needed to look at him, burn his image into her memory before she left.

"You can come back, whenever you want to." Alexa only nodded at his gesture, knowing she wouldn't be coming back any time soon. He seemed to sense that, and made one last effort. "I still love you." The words were so soft they were barely there, and Alexa blinked. She couldn't think of crying now. They'd made mistakes, both of them, and they had to do what was right if they wanted to fix them.

"Love you too, Aje. But I have to go." And before he could say anything else to make her want to stay, she walked out the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kathy quickly traversed the aisles of the grocery store, grabbing some necessities and hoping to get out of the store before anyone recognized her. Before someone asked her how her husband was. Andrew sat in the cart angrily grabbing things from the shelves or trying to open items Kathy had put beside him for purchase. Kathy meandered down the health care aisle, looking for some pain relievers. Her back had been killing her lately. She reached up to get a bottle from the shelf and noticed the home pregnancy tests right in front of her. She hesitantly picked one up and then placed it back down. "No, I’m not. I’m just late." she whispered to herself. She placed the pain pills in the upper cart, on top of her purse so that Andrew couldn’t reach them. Kathy started to walk away and then blindly grabbed one of the tests and tossed it in the cart. "I’m not." she repeated to herself. "I just can’t be."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Sleep tight Tig." Kathy shut Andrew’s door and walked slowly to the bathroom. She had to do it whether she wanted to or not. She was a few weeks late with her period, the tiredness, the backaches, they all added up to something she hoped was not true. Not now.

The phone rang and Kathy ran to the bedroom to grab it off the hook before it woke Andrew. "Hello?"

"Kathy! How are you?"

"Rho? It’s been so long since I’ve heard from you!" She settled down on the bed, prepared for a long story. Rho and Howie had been on vacation, enjoying the time off from touring and rehearsing. They were engaged now, but Howie was still hesitant to stick to a date for a wedding. Rho didn’t really care. She had her man and she was happy, she told Kathy. She didn’t need to be married.

"Kathy? Hello? Anybody home?" Rho was almost yelling into the phone.

"I’m here, sorry Rho."

"What’s wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Kathy." Rho stated flatly. "What’s wrong?"

Kathy took a deep breath. "Everything Rho, absolutely everything."

"I’ll be right there, don’t move." Rho told her.

Kathy poured her story out to her best friend. "And now I think I’m pregnant." She dropped her head to the table. "I just don’t know what to do."

Rho took a sip of her lemonade, considering. "Let’s go check the stick first. One thing at a time."

They walked into the bathroom and Kathy hesitantly picked the test up and turned it over. Positive. She knew it. She flung it onto the counter. "Dammit, dammit to hell!" She turned to Rho and sobbed. "It’s positive, what do I do now?"

Rho led her back to the living room. "Why did he go with Alexa that night?"

"I don’t know." Kathy murmured. "She called, needed to talk to someone about something."

Rho nodded and took a shot in the dark. "How are she and AJ doing?"

Kathy looked up. "I have no idea, fine I guess."

"Um hm, well, we may never know that one." Rho took Kathy’s hand. "Don’t be hasty, Kathy. Nick’s a good man, an honest man. He’s been good to you, hasn’t he?"

Kathy started to sob. "He’s been wonderful to me. We’ve been a little distant the past few weeks, not talked much, but that couldn’t be enough to make him want to leave me, could it?"

"I don’t think he wants to leave you, he made a mistake." Rho rationalized. "He apologized to you, told you what happened, so that shows me he was sincerely sorry."

"But he cheated on me Rho! With a friend, with his friend’s fiancee! How do I forgive him that?"

"I can’t tell you that." Rho answered honestly. "But give him a chance, okay? You’ve got a brother or sister in there for Tigger and that little baby will need a mommy and a daddy."

"I know Rho, I know."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taylor was looking through the cupboards in the kitchen, "Hey, Lex, you in for dinner tonight? I was gonna cook something." She glanced up to see Alexa rush past, then heard retching noises from the bathroom. "Okay, my cooking isn't THAT bad." She walked slowly down the hall, stopping in the open bathroom door. "You okay?"

There was no response from Alexa for a minute, before she turned her head to glare at Taylor. "That has got to be the stupidest question you have EVER asked me." She took a deep breath, and pushed herself back from the toilet bowl. "I feel so bad." She sat back on her butt, and pulled her knees to her chest, resting her head on them.

"What's a matter?" Taylor slid herself down the wall, sitting herself opposite Alexa.

"I don't know," Alexa sighed. "I'll be okay in a few minutes."

"And twenty minutes from then you'll be back in here." Alexa glared at her, "What? You know it's true. You've been sick all week."

"I've just got the flu."

"Maybe you're pregnant." Taylor meant it as a joke.

Alexa glared at her again. "Don't even go there, Taylor."

"I was kidding. But it would be possible right?" Another glare. "Okay, okay, I was just saying."

"Possible or not, I don't think there could be a worse time to even be considering that possibility, so I'd rather not think about it. Besides, it's just the flu that's been going around anyway." She closed her eyes for a second as another wave of nausea swept her.

Taylor watched her friend for a minute, "So, Lex... what's going on?"

"What?" Alexa didn't understand the question. Didn't they just discuss that?

"What are you doing here?"

"I'd rather not talk about it, Taylor." This was not the time for questions. She didn't have the energy to deal with explanations right now.

"I didn't ask any questions when you showed up on my door, asking for a place to stay. I've been waiting patiently, figuring eventually you'd talk. But I'm tired of you moping around and not knowing why." Taylor's voice got louder with every word, conveying her perturbance with her friend.

Alexa couldn't do anything but glare. "You don't want to know Taylor. And I don't want to talk about it." She got up slowly, heading for the room Taylor was letting her stay in.

"You owe me an explanation, Alexa."

The statement made Alexa stop and turn, "Why won't you just believe me that you don't want to know what happened? I don't even want to know what happened. Leave it alone, Tay."

"No, you know what? I'm tired of you not telling me what's going on. Maybe I should give AJ a call, he'd probably tell me. He probably assumes I already know."

"Don't you dare." Alexa's voice didn't sound like her own. "You really want to know what happened. Fine. AJ cheated on me and then I slept with Nick. There, are you happy now? You know all the gory details." She glanced at Taylor's face in time for the realization what she'd said to sink in.

"You what?" Taylor's voice was muted, puzzled.

"You heard me, I can't say it again."

Taylor's hand had gone to her face, attempting to cover her shocked look. "How? Why? I thought you and AJ were good ..."

Alexa laughed wryly, "Ya, well. I thought so too, until LeighAnne informed me otherwise. That's when I was at the hotel. Nick and I got together to talk, we got drunk and basically ruined our lives."

"Wow. That's so not like you."

"Tell me about it."

For once in her life, Taylor was speechless. "So, what's next? Are you and AJ over?"

"Don't know. It's a lot of stuff to deal with. Way more than I ever expected."

"You still love him right?" Alexa nodded. "How's he feel?" Alexa shrugged.

"I don't know for sure. It's hard for me to look at him and not think about the other women. I would bet it's worse for him, since it's Nick. Constant reminders."

"Maybe the time apart will make that okay." Taylor didn't sound too sure, but she was trying to be positive.

"Maybe." Alexa hoped so. But she didn't know if it would ever be okay.

Taylor didn't say anything else, and remained sitting on the bathroom floor, as Alexa leaned in the doorway. She waited another minute, then turned to walk away. "So, was Nicky good?" Alexa gave her the exasperated, I can't-believe-you-just-asked-me-that face. "It's not as if I'll ever have the chance to find out for myself..." Alexa shook her head as she walked away from the door. "C'mon Lex, share a little... just a tiny detail. Something? Anything?"