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| And in the fire NERO forged his IGBRANG ... |
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| Ah, the fabled last Emperor of the Judio-Claudian Dynasty, the foul destroyer of an Empire ... Legend has it Nero strummed his harp as Rome burst into flames. Legend also has it that Nero shot four arrows into the corners of the earth and that a precocious chimney-sweep named Robin Hood shot them each from the air to win his reputation as a marksman, twelve million golden pazoozas, and the hand of the princess Minnie. |
| In a stunning postdiluvian echo, NERO Adventure Racing burst through its nourishing placental lining nearly 2000 years after the Emperor's own demise. Indeed, one day the four founding members of the now-defunct Canadian Amateur Stunt Snowshoe Association were considering their athletic futures. Tossed casually through the air by those athletically worthy of such flippancy were words like "I am the greatest skeet shooter since that guy who wrapped Duck Hunt", "My left bicept tastes like kryptonite", "Beijing 2008, baby, 2008", and "Who ate the last honey crueller?" |
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| And that's our story. We may or may not stick to it. But if we don't, it's only because our glue sponsor used too few horses. Once Quality Control sorts out the problem, we'll be sticking to something. Bet on it. Bet on us. For real. We'd love your sponsorship and would work hard to promote your business. We're an email away. |
| Yet their conversation always returned to the smell of dew on freshly cut grass, which Janice insisted (to Matt's vehement protest) was a scent worthy of bottling, pending the endorsement of the late Mickey Rooney. Or at least that of his estate. So when the quadrant entered their first adventure race they became instantly enamored by the cling of lycra on their bulging thighs, thighs for many years honed on a steady diet of stunt snowshoeing and cantaloupe. Agreeing the sensation was unlike any other they formed NERO AR and stand before you today. |
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