November, 16, 2003
Why is it that among the most hectic times of our lives, among the most busy, among the times of least certainty, are the exact times in particular where we often take steps away from the master comforter, the alpha and omega, the great Lord. A deportation away from the Lord is not what necessarily causes the great conflicts and problems I currently have in mind, although stepping away from the Lord does nothing but to worsen the already difficult situations that many students all over the world are soon to go through. In the past, I myself have spent considerable time away from God during times of the most difficult and demanding final exams. I have skipped or arrived late to even a service, to get just a little more studying done. This would not be significant if it was a phenomenon only occurring within my own being, but it is a near universal phenomenon that takes place in the lives of many, many Christians. This does not apply to only exams; situations occur in people�s lives where they feel great sadness, disappointments, frustrations, and loss of reality. It is in these cases where I have witnesses many fall away from the church, some even until current times and some only for a temporary sense. Indeed, during the major moments of our life, our spiritual walk can hardly stay the same as it once was. It can only stagnant and suffer, or reach new peaks as new passions materialize and we depend even more on God. Just as many people can admit that a major crisis in their life has caused them to leave the church and forsake God as the people whom have said that a great crisis in their life has brought them to know God for the first time and to truly experience His love and provision. Such crises may include deaths of loved ones, shattered romances, broken friendships, loss of identity or self, or a realization of a life lived in utter sin. In a slightly lesser sense and to a slightly lesser degree, the the small sorrows, disappointments, preoccupations, and stress we may face through normal interactions and dynamics of our modern life and social structure may cause us to choose whether to grow stronger with God or to allow ourselves to wither. Thus as finals approach, I pray that we may all choose and commit to take the alternative path rather than stagnating and slowly falling away from God (in time, passion, commitment) , but that we may instead grow stronger in God and grow in passion, love, and devotion. For during these times we cannot stay the same. I will pray for everyone both here and back at home that the more desirable path is chosen and that it is continued to be chosen for the upcoming years.
November 3.2003
While I was praying recently, a particular phrase somehow entered my mind, which touched me greatly and had revealed unto me a revelation. The phrase was as follows:
Through You [God] I cannot do all things,
But through me You [God] can do all things.
The difference seems to be subtle, and perhaps even confusing at first glance, but the ways in which these two statements differ is immense. In accordance with the first statement above, if there is an interpretation that "through God I can do all things," we can be led to falsely believe that once under the great power and blessing of God through the manifestation of the Holy Spirit within our lives, that we are in a way indestructible and that we may have some supernatural power within ourselves; that through our own will and ability we can somehow shape God�s will around us and perform the miraculous signs and wonders that WE wish to enact. But this is a misleading falsehood which may cause a devoted Christian to fall under err, for even when under the power and influence of the Holy Spirit within our very being, we are still powerless ourselves unless we act under the will of God and through His intentions. Thus we do not have any power in and of ourselves and we cannot do all things. This is even true when we act in God's name or attempt to God as a vessel and his power as a means to accomplish our own goals, despite our good or bad intentions. Instead the inverse is the truth, whereas God may use us as a vessel to do HIS will, and when this occurs, all things are possible- mountains may be moved, masses may be saved, and blessings and spiritual gifts may increase. God thus can do all things using us as a vessel to accomplish his goals, (instead of the other way around) but we must not percieve matters as though we expect our every whim to be granted simply because we act in Jesus' name, for at times we act and think out of God's will even if we do not know it or understand why. In short, all miraclous things are possible to be accomplished by each one of us, but only if that action is God's will. Through everything, we just simply must remember that all power comes from God, and we may pray that our will be accomplished and fulfilled, but not neccessarily always expect it it to be. Even at the times when we feel most blessed by God, we must remember that this blessing is not for us to fully control and use as a means to further our own goals, however well-meaning they may be, but instead we must alwasys follow and act under the will of God; and as the Lord uses us as willing vessels to do his own will, we may do great unbelievable works for the sake of the kingdom.
Feburary 3, 2003
So much in the world is unknown to us, things that are both relevant and important, as well as things that are not. One thing though is for certain, and my sympathies go out to any unfortunate soul whom has not yet experienced it: Love. Now I do not speak of a cheap, quick, and superficial love, especially not one that is based on anything purely physical. What I speak of is deeper, everlasting, and utterly fulfilling... and this love comes purely from God. It is not just a love that makes one feel warm and fuzzy within, but one which penetrates the spirit and soul to such an extent that one's entire outlook on life takes a dramatic shift. Smells of a beautiful God-blessed morning fill the nostrils of one who has never had the privilege before to experience such a wonder. The sky, nature, and every possible thing around you reminds you of God's great grace, beauty, and indescribable awesomeness. Smiles just automatically occur, and contentment with life inherently follows. It is not a simply a self-indulging love either, for it gives one the ability to greater love their brothers and sisters to such an extent that every effort is made to assist them in any way possible. One's own well-being and time suddenly seems nowhere near as important as that of others. Passion does not lack, and apathy surely does not exist. Everything is peaceful, happy, and perfectly and unbelievably amazing.
