Have decided to reply you with this... no you're not a piece of shit which I've thrown away... you're someone whom I broke up with due to circumstances... if not for the fact that you're not here... yes I do often wonder if we'd still be together... I know how hard it is for you... but the fact that I'm the one causing you so much pain... means that I can't do much to alleviate the pain... because whatever I do... you'd take it the wrong way... whatever I say... you'd not be satisfied... I know you... we've been together for what... 2 years? though the last part of it.. you weren't around... I know how you'd react to the things I say... the things I do... likewise, you know me well... you know my habits... you know the things that I like to say.. you know my thoughts... sometimes you may not fully understand them or appreciate them... or even agree with them... but nevertheless you know... which is why I think you understand what I'm trying to say...

yes you're still special to me.. you will always be... its a fact... I'm not going to deny your existence or the fact that we've been through a lot together... things just didn't turn out the way we wanted them to... yes it bloody hurts...

I'd like you to understand that I'm happy with my life now.. I've moved on... cruel as it may sound... I've tried hard not to look back... tried hard not to regret... so much so that sometimes I think I'm running away from you...

My hall life.. is crazy... busy... hall friends are just about the only friends that I hang out with now... which is why I say they're a bit part of my life now... I'm with them 5 days a week! yup... I hope you understand that no.. I'm not treating you like shit... (hope by repeating this a lot of time you'd finally get it) I just don't know how to treat you without you getting hurt...

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wonderful day I must say... considering the fact that I slept at 5 and woke up at 8... realised that there's no Econs lecture today! hahaha.. twice ... my determination wasn't needed... ha! was late for Psych lecture... had a mini project discussion... and followed by 4 hours of lecture and tut! gee... was falling asleep throughout the lecture and tut... so finished early and came back to rest... yup... I'm going to rest soon...

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am quite happy! yup... I think I can go on being happy like this everyday... have totally taken over Yk's bed... ah.. those poor guys... didn't let them sleep coz I was feeling very awake... so was bugging them while they watched soccer... did some very stupid things... playing with those stupid shaver... snatching pillows... fighting.. haha.. have sorta become Shingfeng's talk crap partner... hanging out a blk 3 is really quite fun... haha... coz get to run from room to room! =)

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have grown addicted to this smell... its common.. but every time I smell that... feel happy! =)

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