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The NSCBZ CHRONICLE from Tibet, "a nice place to pray".

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General Synod to choose Irish Entertainer.

By Teresa MacManion.

Cardinal Paul Redacci convened ameeting of the famous "general Synod" of the neo roman-catholic church on tuesday of this week to discuss the candidacy of Pope for the new millenium. "A minimum of two years experience with Flash or Dreamweaver will be required" , said the Cardinal, "Also some knowledge of HTML and DHTML would be an advantage, but not absolutely necessary, and of course we would prefer a non-smoker". Reporters questioned the many of the top ranking clerics present about who are most likely to succeed to the exalted postion. Junior cleric Angelo Mancini confided to us that Veteran Irish Entertainer "Maxi" had one of the strongest bids to emerge from the first round of negotiatons. "we will be looking for some sort of female pope for a change this time I think", father Mancini told us, "Maxi certainly has all the qualities of a woman and her keyboard chops are frankly, amazing" Should Maxi become Pope, she intends to take the biblical name Joseph, only the fifth pope to do so, most of them having opted for "paul" or "pauly" and will be known therafter as Pope Joseph Maxi - the first. Vatican 3 has been cancelled this summer to allow grazing.

Impetus towards fostering originality shocker

crosstimulation a factor in collective urge to generate novelty and divergence.

"The importance of the notion of creativity in contemporary society and the consequent impetus toward fostering originality are often manifested in terms of an emphasis on novelty and divergence" a top lateral thinking guru said yesterday. "Radical discontinuity is not necessarily a feature of creative works", he continued, adding- "Original work will be part of an existing framework, but will depart from that framework in other ways". NSCBZ authorities intend to investigate claims made about new art works which generally take the postion that this stuff isn't just bad art, it's not even art at all. This reporter may not know much about journalism, but he knows what he likes.


Intellectual property rezoning.

many first time buyers priced out of market

A crises in intellectual property rights is looming. Huge shortages in high quality intellectual properties are expected throughout the next decade, with many famous artists and musicians already remortgaging large tracts of creative realestate, rather than investing in expensive and difficult "new stuff". "Look at those fucking negativespacecowboyz" said one outraged litigation manager, "they 're up there mixing and reinterpreting work made by many hardworking movie studios who have expressly forbidden the performance - in whole or in part - of this intellectual property" "who do they think they are?, this will jepordise the production of future work!" he lambasted. NSCBZ have acknowledged the looming disaster but are said to be claiming squatters rights.



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