* * *
Josie paced her office. The day would be arriving when Sam would walk into her office and want to talk to her. She didn't know what to say or do. Should she tell him about Sammy? But she knew Sam, and if he knew about his daughter, that would mean he would want to be a part of her life again. And after the way he ran out on her, she didn't know if she could let him back into her life and into her heart.
A knock on the door startled her. Josie turned and saw Sam staring at her. Her heart started beating double time. If it was possible, he looked even more incredibly handsome than she remembered.
"S�Sam! Hi, how are you?" Josie said nervously, crossing the room to sit behind her desk, closed off to him.
Sam smiled gently at her. She was so beautiful! He wanted to touch her, to let her know that everything was all right and he was back for good, anyway she wanted him. He would sacrifice his entire world if he could just kiss her once more.
"God, Josie� You look wonderful! Time away from me must have made you thrive," Sam joked, trying to break the ice as he sat down onto the sofa against the opposite wall of her office.
However, Josie didn't find his comment funny. "Time away from you, Sam, has made me an individual. I'm no longer the pushover I was before we met. I am now strong and able because I've had to be."
"That, too�" Sam muttered uncomfortably. "Um� So�you called me to tell me something. What did you want to tell me?" he asked, praying it was that maybe she now wanted him back, even after everything he'd done.
Josie played with a set of keys on her desk, avoiding his piercing eyes. She wanted to handle the situation tactfully. One look at him and she knew she would blurt out the entire story. And most likely, with Sam being the honorable sort he was, he would insist on becoming a family. She wanted him back�there was no denying that�but she wanted him to want her back, and not want her because of Sammy. She wanted to know he loved her for her and not just because of the baby they produced together.
"I�just thought that it had been a while and we should catch up. I mean," Josie choked out, "we had a pretty good time together�and it just ended really quickly. We never really kept in touch." Josie blushed.
Sam looked at her. God, she was beautiful! He had been a fool to let Lara seduce him the way she did, regardless of the fact that he'd been intoxicated. And he'd been a fool not to try harder to get beyond that and fight for his relationship with Josie. He longed to touch Josie and tell her she still did it for him: that she was the one that made his breath catch and made his heart pound. He wanted her to know that he'd never stopped loving her, and that he still felt the same. He wanted to tell her 100 times over and over, until she believed him.
Josie looked up from her lap, and their eyes connected. His eyes were greener than they remembered and she found herself, against her will, being drawn right into their depths.
Suddenly, Anita pushed her way into the office door without even knocking, coming to stand before Josie's desk.
"Good Morning, Jos! How'd ya sleep?" Anita spoke rapid-fire, as usual, and didn't even notice Sam sitting on the sofa behind her.
Josie tried to somehow tell Anita with her eyes to shut up�that now was not the time to reveal her secret.
Anita frowned a little at Josie's strange look, but didn't make the connection. "Well, you don't look so good� I'll bet Sammy kept you up again, huh? Tell me, am I right?"
Sam looked at Josie and Anita curiously. Who was Sammy? And why would he keep Josie up all night? Josie looked over at Sam worriedly. He looked confused�and hurt?
Following Josie's gaze, Anita turned and saw the man Josie idolized sitting on the couch behind her.
"Oops�um�catch you later, Josie�" Anita said as she bolted from the room, embarrassed.
"So�who's Sammy?" Sam said at last. "Is this what you wanted to tell me? That you're seeing someone else?"
Sam didn't look too happy about that prospect. Josie looked at him and melted. Maybe he did still have feelings for her! She knew she couldn't keep it a secret any longer. After all, Sammy was his daughter too, and he had every right to know she existed.
"Sammy isn't another man, Sam" Josie barked out an ironic as she said that. Sam looked slightly humored, but quickly regained his senses.
"Who or what is Sam then?" He pleaded with his eyes to know the truth.
Josie watched the emotions playing across Sam's face for a long moment. Was he ready to know the truth? Moreover, was she able to tell him?
"Sam is� Sammy is�um�" Josie began.
"Sam is what, Jos?"
"My baby, Sam� Our baby girl," Josie blurted out.
Sam suddenly bolted out of his seat, crossing the room in huge steps. It was something that they had longed to hear when they were together. A little girl�his little girl, a part of him out there, growing, being and living. He looked at Josie and reached for her, his heart longing to make that connection once again.
"Don't, Sam!" Josie said, pushing him away from her. "I don't want to be second best in your life. I don't want you to want me just because of her!"
"Second best!? You were never second best to me, Josie," Sam denied.
"And you, of course, proved that by running off with Lara�" Josie retorted, not wanting to believe him.
"Jos, I love you. I always have. Knowing about Sammy just makes it that little bit stronger and a lot more meaningful. We can be a family, Josie. I swear that I won't hurt you again� No more Lara and no more childish fantasies� Just you and me and our little girl. Isn't that what you want?"
Josie looked at him, her angry glare burning a whole into his head. "Do you have any idea how long I have waited to hear you say that? Almost a year and a half, Sam! You were the first person I loved, and you broke my trust. And now it is only with your knowledge of Sammy that finally brings you back. What else can I do but say no?"
Sam held out his hands to prevent her from saying out any more damaging remarks. He realized she thought he wanted her because of Sammy. The truth was that it did made Josie even more desirable to him, but he didn't love her because of the baby. He loved her because she was Josie. The Josie that held his heart captivated for over 2 years.
"Listen, just give me a chance, Jos. That's all I'm asking for. I can prove to you that I am the man you once loved. I can do that if you give me just one chance," Sam begged.
"Sam, you ran back to Lara as soon as things got rough for us without a second thought of me. I can't put Sammy through that, nor can I go through that a second time," Josie cried.
Sam couldn't take it any longer. He had to know: had to know if she still loved him�if he even had a chance with her. And there was only one way he could think of to get the truth out of her right now. Sam walked around the side of the desk, wrapped his arms around her and kissed her passionately.
Josie tried to resist, but soon found herself kissing him back with all the emotion she still felt deep in her heart. He held her hair the way she loved and Josie knew she was about to give in to it all, trapped in a web that she couldn't get out off. Breaking away, slapped his face. "How dare you think you can come in here and kiss me like that after everything you've done!"
Sam looked stunned and hurt after the amazing kiss they shared, but then he understood it. Josie may still love him, but it was going to take a lot of work for her to trust him again. He was kicking himself for letting her go when he had her. Now it seemed he may never be able to get it back. Maybe it was too late.
"I love you, Josie. I always have," Sam said. "Whether you believe it or not is up to you. But believe me, you should believe it�"
Josie looked away at this. Sam frowned. Josie looked up into his eyes and knew she couldn't just let him walk away without even letting him see his daughter.
"Listen Sam, romantically it's over between us. But for Samanthas sake� Come over for dinner and you can meet her."
Sam smiled at Josie. Whether or not she knew it, she was leaving the door open a crack for him. He was going to try his hardest to succeed in winning her heart. Then perhaps one day she would be Mrs. Josie Coulson; something he had always desired, but after his mistakes, he knew it was something he was going to have to work at.
Somehow, someway, it would happen. It had to.
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