Running Late
By Sara
Date Posted: September 16, 1999
Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me. 'Nough said.
Note: This is a companion piece to "Count Down." Thanks to the wonderful
response my first "Josie" perspective got…I've been inspired (you know who
you are!) by several others to write "Sam's" perspective. At least as I see
it. So here's my go at it. Enjoy…and let me know what you think!
* * *
2:00
Sam Coulson looked desperately from the clock on his dashboard to the line of
cars in front of him that seemed to go on forever. The line of very slow
moving cars. He had two minutes to make it to the park, to make it to Josie,
to make it to his future. He knew this because the radio station he was
listening to was broadcasting live from the ballpark…counting down the
minutes left.
Josie was waiting for him. In front of all those people, people cheering for
her, cheering for them.
Them. Sam and Josie. It was a nice thought to focus on as he desperately
inched forward in the traffic jam.
He'd somehow known, even if he hadn't admitted it until recently, that there
was going to be a 'them.' Ever since he'd first laid eyes on her in his
classroom. He remembered it clearly…
He'd been worn out that morning…a night arguing with Laura on the phone about
his moving to New York tended to do that. All they'd seemed to do lately was
argue. It wasn't a great way to conduct a relationship. Not that they'd
really had a relationship lately, with her so involved in work and in New
York. And strangely, he hadn't found himself missing her all that much. But
that was an emotion he didn't feel like dealing with today. He needed to
forget. He needed to lose himself in Shakespeare, and hope some of the young
minds he taught followed him. He doubted it, but figured he could at least
hope.
He been clutching his coffee like a lifeline, hoping it would help him stay
awake, as he entered the classroom that morning, noticing the familiar faces
suddenly turning his way. He's smiled at them, realizing yet again that even
though they might not be the most enthusiastic students at times, he
genuinely enjoyed teaching them. He figured they'd appreciate him at a later
date at least.
He dropped his briefcase on the desk, removing the lid from his coffee and
taking a sip of it, letting the flavor explode over his taste buds. Ahhh…now
that was the way to start a morning. He smiled, feeling human for the first
time, and turned to face his class.
That's when he'd seen her. He had to admit, the feathery boa type design
around her top was the first thing that caught his eye. So did the awful
lipstick she was wearing, so pale and clear, her mouth looked like an icicle.
The curled and feathered hair was a pretty shade of blonde, if a bit overdone
for an average school day. After a moment, he smiled, realizing this girl
wasn't afraid to be different. She couldn't be, wearing that outfit was a
huge risk, especially in this school. At least he hoped she wasn't afraid to
be different. Still, he had to admit, she was fascinating to look at. He
suddenly realized he'd been staring and brought himself back to the present.
He looked at her and smiled, deciding a welcome was in order.
"Hi there, I'm Sam…Coulson. The school has this thing about letting you guys
call me Sam," he began, wondering if that sounded stupid. He didn't stop to
analyze why he might be thinking that. He quickly forgot about it as he heard
her answer, her voice low and resonant and strangely compelling.
"I'm Josie…Geller. I don't think the school would have a problem with you
calling me that," was her response as she looked up at him.
That's when he noticed her eyes. Eyes that caused a sudden jolt to go through
his system as they met his. Eyes that reflected so many emotions; fear,
excitement, curiosity and even a slight pain buried deep within them. Eyes
that seemed to hold more knowledge than the mere 17 years he knew she must
be. He couldn't stop his reaction as he continued to gaze at his new student.
It was stunning. It was unsettling. He'd never had that type of reaction with
anyone, not even Laura. Much less a student.
A student.
He had to remind himself rather forcefully of that fact. She was his student.
He'd better remember that. He quickly decided it was time to get things back
on track, pushing the emotions bombarding him down.
"Well Josie Geller, welcome to Shakespeare's "As You Like It," he managed,
smiling as he quickly turned to address the class, not wanting to analyze the
relief…yet sense of loss, he felt as he broke his gaze with Josie.
With a mental shake, he began class, hoping against hope that the kids had
read the assignment. He wasn't asking for much…just a definition of
'pastoral.' He figured you couldn't get much simpler than that. He tried not
to audibly cringe as his students attempted to answer the question, hoping
against hope someone, anyone would answer.
When he saw Josie's hand go up, he almost sighed in relief as he called on
her.
"Pastoral means set in the country. Originally seen in the Eclogues of
Virgil. It's from the Latin 'pascere,' to graze."
He hoped his jaw hadn't dropped visibly. He could only stand there in stunned
amazement, trying to comprehend what his new student had just said. He wasn't
sure he heard it right. He couldn't have, could he? I mean, this girl was
only 17. And she'd read the Eclogues of Virgil? Who was this Josie Geller?
That thought brought Sam back to the present. And alerted him to the fact his
car hadn't moved more than two inches in the past few moments.
1:30
He pounded on the horn as he watched the car in front of him inch forward at
a crawl. This was insane! He had 1:30 to claim his future. He wasn't going to
make it at this rate. And Josie, his Josie, was standing in front of everyone
she knew, everyone she cared about, waiting for him. Taking the biggest risk
of her life. He could only be amazed at her courage, and at the fact that
she'd admitted to the whole population of Chicago that she loved him. Well,
she hadn't named him straight out, but everyone who knew her would know.
He thought back to her impromptu performance at the club that night. He'd
been amazed as well as amused when she gotten up on stage and started
dancing. Yes, some of it was rather embarrassing, but she was having a
wonderful time, that much was obvious. He did wonder if she was her normal
self for a moment, but that quickly faded as he let himself enjoy watching
her enjoy herself. He had a feeling the 'popular' group down in front were
laughing at her, and a part of him ached for her. But a stronger part of him
had to admire her courage to get up there. Either way, she fascinated him.
He knew Laura had been annoyed at his preoccupation with watching Josie, but
he hadn't cared.
Later on that night, seeing her sitting with the Rastifari…he'd realized
she'd probably had more in her system that pure excitement. He had a moment
of wondering if she'd be okay, wondering if he should go find out if she was
okay…a moment ruined by Laura's whining that she was ready to leave. He saw
Josie laughing with the group and figured she must be okay, though part of
him didn't want to leave. Without her. He remembered not feeling the
slightest bit of guilt at the thought of leaving with Josie, while Laura was
there at his side. Maybe he had had too much to drink.
He came back to the present again, smiling at that thought. He'd been paying
no attention to Laura from the minute he realized Josie was in the bar. The
smile quickly turned to a frown as he watched the car in front of him come to
a complete stop.
1:00
He leaned on the horn again as he heard the radio announcer call out the
1minute mark. Dear God, he really wasn't gonna make it. And he didn't even
want to think what that would do to Josie if he didn't. Didn't want to think
what it would do to him if he didn't make it.
He suddenly remembered her laugh as she realized he was afraid of the Ferris
Wheel. He didn't know what had possessed him to climb into that bucket with
her. He was terrified of heights, even Laura hadn't ever been able to get him
onto a ride with her. But she'd been all alone, and he'd been tired of
fighting the urge not to talk to her, outside of class at least. This was a
carnival, it was fun, relaxed. Surely a teacher could enjoy a nice friendly
ride on the Ferris Wheel with a student? He hadn't stopped to consider his
fear of heights until they were rising into the air. He remembered feeling a
bit better as he saw understanding in Josie's eyes as he explained his fear
was of plunging into the crowd. She hadn't teased him, hadn't told him grow
up and overcome it. Things he'd heard way to often from Laura.
He'd felt a slight embarrassment at Tommy's "Mr. Coulson rocks my world!"
line, but quickly covered it with his explanation of why many boys would
always be rattling cages. He hadn't known he was going to tell Josie about
Laura, or the move to New York. He'd just felt like he could talk to her,
something he hadn't felt with anyone lately. Especially a student. That
brought him back to the realization he shouldn't be talking to her like this.
He didn't know what was coming over him, but realized he had to say something
to continue the conversation.
He didn't know what possessed him to tell her that 'guys would be lined up
around the block for her when she was his age.' He couldn't stop the
instinctive reaction in his gut that he wanted to be one of those guys.
Despite her current age.
"You have to say that because you're my teacher," was her hesitant reply. It
stopped him cold. A moment of silence passed as he tried to comprehend what
he'd said. He couldn't have said that, could he? Not to a student? Not as a
teacher?
"Actually, I shouldn't say that to you, because I'm your teacher," was all
he'd managed to reply with, quickly breaking the intense gaze he'd suddenly
realized he'd been sharing with her as he saw her eyes lower and a blush
steal over her face.
Dear God…what was he doing? He closed his eyes in a grimace as the Ferris
Wheel descended, telling himself over and over again that this wasn't a smart
idea and he'd better start fighting the growing attraction he was feeling for
Josie. She was his student. He had to remember that. Thought he was fast
realizing it was an uphill battle.
Sam again returned to the present, remembering the joy and pain of that
moment, realizing for the first time, that he was falling for one of his
students.
:30
"Will he or won't he show up? Reporter Josie Geller's mystery man has thirty
seconds left to appear and answer her challenge…answer her declaration of
love. Will her 'mystery teacher' show up? Call us with your vote in our
ongoing live poll…"
Sam stared in horror at his car radio. They were taking call-ins about
whether he'd show up or not? Oh God, this was going to be worse than he
thought. Josie would be humiliated. And even if at one time, filled with the
hurt of deception, of betrayal, a part of him had wanted that to happen to
her, the truest part of himself knew he'd never be able to live with himself
if he did.
He remembered the pure shock that had coursed through his system as she'd
thrown her crown to the floor and declared her real age that night at the
prom.
She was 25? And a reporter for the Sun Times? She was 25? She was undercover?
She was 25.
All he knew was that he had to get out of there. It was too much to
comprehend, too much to think about. He'd managed to make it to the front
steps, sitting down behind a shrub, trying to process what he'd just heard.
Josie Geller was 25 years old. And a reporter. She wasn't a student. She
wasn't off limits. She was someone he could actually be attracted to. Someone
he was actually allowed to fall in love with. Those thoughts bombarded him,
along with ones of pure betrayal.
How could she have lied to him? How? And just as he'd been about to tell her
he was falling for her. He closed his eyes, remembering what had finally
drawn him to that conclusion, and the need to admit it.
He'd finally done it. Broken up with Laura over the weekend. He'd realized he
couldn't take her anymore, realized he didn't love her anymore. Hadn't for a
while in fact. He'd remembered the feeling of freedom that coursed through
him as he hung up the phone. He was free! Free to … free too what?
That had been a hell of a night. He'd tossed and turned all night, trying to
sort out his feelings for Josie. Telling himself over and over all the
reasons why he shouldn't even think about waiting for her, why he shouldn't
even think about dating her when she graduated from high school. Went through
all the reasons it was a very, very bad idea. He'd been a mass of confusion
the next few days, not sure what to do, or how to do it.
Their conversation the day before the prom had been the deciding factor.
He'd heard her talking about Betty and Veronica and she'd looked so sweet, so
lovely, standing there, her hair blowing in the breeze, he knew he couldn't
fight the urge to be with her any longer. He couldn't remember what he said
about Veronica, something about 'high maintenance' or such. He'd felt his
world disappear as they walked through the prom decorations together, talking
about this and that. He forgot for a moment that he was a teacher, and Josie
was his student, and instead let himself pretend they were two people,
attracted to each other, finding out more about each other. He'd spotted the
benches behind some shrubbery and almost without realizing it, pulled her
over to it, trying to ignore the jolt that rippled through his body as he
grabbed her hand in the process. Wow! If that's what it felt like simply to
touch her hand…what would it feel like when he kissed her?
He stopped those thoughts right away, quickly dropping her hand, knowing
better than to go there. Especially here with so many people around. What
could he say though? The tension was so high between them. He knew she was
feeling the attraction as well, it was so thick, you'd have to be blind, deaf
or dumb to not notice it. So what now? He met her gaze and found himself
locked in a pool of emotions, intriguing and thrilling him all at once. He
truly knew what 'lost in your eyes' meant now. But what was he going to do
now?
Suddenly, he remembered the Dartmouth appointment he'd gotten for her, and
managed to break the spell she seemed to have cast over him. He'd seen the
quick fear cross her face, then the pure happiness as she realized he
actually cared about what she did with her life. He felt his heart completely
stolen from him as he heard her soft voice asking if he 'really believed in
her that much?'
The most natural thing in the world to do had been to grab her hand and tell
her.
"Of course I do. You're a great writer Josie…you just have to find your
story," he'd said intently, gaze locked with hers. Neither seemed willing to
break it, and Sam found himself debating the merits of simply leaning in and
placing his lips on hers. And as their gazes locked, he could see she was
waiting for him to do just that. Her eyes were begging him to…and he was sure
his were expressing the same emotion. It was the most powerful, tension
filled, erotic moment he could ever remember in his life.
He'd known then he had to tell her. There was no other way. He loved her…and
he thought she could love him. The age difference didn't matter, he could
wait. After all she wasn't that much younger, and once she was in college,
and not his student, he'd be free to pursue their relationship. He knew
that's what he had to do. He loved her. And he'd tell her at the prom.
He remembered coming back to himself then, sitting alone outside the prom,
realizing she must have lied about everything. She couldn't be the woman he'd
fallen in love with. His heart was falling to pieces as he thought about how
lovingly she'd looked up at him as she'd said she had something to tell him,
just a few moments ago. He suddenly wondered if she was going to tell him
about her deception. That it had all been a deception. Including her falling
for him. She had to be using him for a story. She couldn't love him. And he'd
gone ahead and fallen for her. He knew nothing about her, for all he knew,
she could be nothing like what she'd made herself. And that hurt the most.
The fact that he'd bought it all, from the penguin analogy to her love of
Shakespeare, to the attraction he'd let himself believe in, believe was
returned.
He remembered the crushing blow as he heard George asking her if she'd gotten
the story on him. It was all a lie. He was just a story. He'd had to force
himself not to run to her as she tried to explain, his heart nearly ripped
out of his chest at her desperate "you were attracted to me?" line.
Everything in him rebelled. She'd lied to him. To everyone. For a story. She
wasn't the Josie Geller he'd fallen in love with over the past weeks. She was
someone he didn't know. And he'd never be able to see her the same way again.
But he wasn't going to stop loving her. And that hurt the most. His stubborn
pride was the only thing that let him walk away from her, forcing himself not
to listen to her breaking voice, forcing himself not to hear the truth, the
plea in her words.
It had been hell…packing to move, wondering what to do now. His life was a
mess, and the worst part was, he was still in love with her. Not even knowing
who she was. And that infuriated him. It also caused him the deepest sense of
loss he could ever remember. He felt like he'd lost his best friend, his soul
mate. All over a woman, a reporter none the less, that he knew nothing about.
All he knew was that he had to leave, he couldn't bear to be anywhere near
her. Not as tempted to go running back to her as he was. It was a miserable
two days. The worst of his life.
He'd never forget how close to losing her forever he'd been that evening.
He'd grabbed the paper to wrap up his trophies, not caring to even read it.
It brought back to many painful memories. He'd never have even noticed the
article if it hadn't been for her eyes, staring at him through the crumpled
paper he'd just wrapped around his Pewee hockey trophy.
He'd felt his heart leap, knowing he'd recognize those eyes anywhere. So
she'd written her story after all. Why was he not surprised? That's what
she'd been after the whole time, wasn't it? He told himself he wasn't going
to read it, not wanting to know what she'd written about him, wondering how
everyone would think of him after reading about the nature of
'student/teacher' relationships. He'd moved to put the trophy back in the
box, but something stopped him. He didn't know what, but something.
He'd unwrapped the trophy slowly, closing his eyes, taking a deep breath, and
smoothing out the paper. He stared in shock, not at a picture of him, but
three pictures of Josie. A very different and geekish looking young high
school girl. A refined, quiet, unassuming newspaper reporter with long dark
hair. And the woman he'd fallen in love with on the night of her second prom.
What had she written?
He'd started reading, and hadn't been able to put it down. He felt every once
of her pain, sympathizing with her feelings, her desire to fit in, to be
accepted for who she was. Felt the pain of the rejection on her first prom
night. Felt her joy as he read about her finally fitting in, and being
popular her second time around. As he neared the end of the article he
admitted to himself one clear truth.
He'd fallen in love with the real Josie Geller. She might have lied about her
age, and being a student, but everything he'd just read, everything he knew
about her, was a testament to who she was…who he'd learned she was over the
past weeks. And he knew she was the woman he was meant to love forever. He
didn't know how he'd ever doubted it.
Then he'd read the last two paragraphs. His heart had stopped as he read the
simple, honest, heart felt words.
"I think I am in love with you."
She was in love with him. Sam Coulson. Still, despite the way he'd treated
her. She still loved him. His heart suddenly flew as he realized he might
have a chance at happiness after all. Then he'd finished the article, nearly
dropping the paper as he read her proposal to him. She was telling the world
she loved him and was giving the world the chance to watch her claim her
happiness. Telling the world she was waiting for her first real kiss. From
him. He didn't think his world could get any brighter as he though of finally
giving in to his desire and kissing the life out of her.
He suddenly looked at the clock and realized it was 15 minutes to game time.
15 minutes?!
He'd dropped the paper like a hot potato and bolted for the door, barely
remembering to grab his keys, knowing he had to get to her. He only hoped he
wasn't too late.
That thought brought him back to the present, along with immediate knowledge
he couldn't wait any longer.
:20
He turned off the car, ignoring the horns and yells he heard from behind him.
With a quick motion, he jumped out of his car and took off like a bat out of
hell…running the two blocks to the stadium, praying he made it in time. As he
ran, he let the bitter memories of the past few days be replaced with hope
and love for the future. Love for the woman of his dreams, his soul mate.
Love for the woman he'd come to realize he wanted to kiss for the rest of his
life. And hers.
:10
He felt himself move faster, breathing as best he could, a sigh of relief as
he entered the walkway to the stadium. He could hear the crowd cheering,
feeling an extra burst of speed as he registered their countdown.
:05
"Five…four…three…two…one…."
:00
Sam nearly stopped as he heard the crowd suddenly grow quiet, realizing his
time had run out.
Oh God…he was too late. Josie was standing out there, in front of everyone,
thinking he wasn't coming, thinking he didn't forgive her, didn't love her.
He could swear he felt her pain in his bones.
His heart cried out to her to hang on as he bolted through the stadium's
entrance, coming out at the very top of the bleachers. He paused for a
moment, unnoticed by the crowd, only seeing the small figure standing on home
plate, a slight slump to her shoulders the only telling sight of her
emotions. He could feel the pain and disillusionment coming off her in waves,
and his heart broke, then healed a bit as she tried out a brave smile for the
crowd, so silent now he could hear the reverberation as the microphone
dropped from her hand.
He suddenly realized that was his future if he didn't run down these stairs
at this moment. An empty, reverberating life, filled with regrets…and an
absence of love.
Not if he had anything to say about it.
He felt a renewed burst of energy as he began his mad dash down the
bleachers. He barely registered the stir this caused…barely heard the
cheering and chanting start up again, barely heard the yells and victorious
screams of hundreds of crazy fans as they watched him fly down the bleachers.
He heard and saw nothing but Josie as he reached the gate to the field and
flung it open. He felt his heart completely heal as he ran towards her, and
saw her head rise…her tear filled eyes connecting powerfully with his. The
impact nearly stopped him in his tracks, the love shining in those beautiful
eyes awing him with its power.
He suddenly knew everything was going to be all right.
He smiled at her, seeing her face light up and a tear slip down her cheek as
he finally reached the pitcher's mound. Then, without further ado, he reached
for her, pulling her tightly to him, and kissed her.
The instant their lips met, he knew he'd found his home. The impact rocked
his world, literally. Bright lights exploded behind his eyes as he lost
himself in the wonder of the most powerful kiss he'd ever felt in his life.
This was what a kiss was meant to be. This was the kiss he hadn't realized
he'd been waiting for his entire life. Josie was right when she'd said she'd
'never been kissed.' Until this moment, he suddenly realized he hadn't
either. No kiss had ever felt like this. So perfect, so all consuming, so
powerful, so loving, so right.
He knew then he'd found his other half. His life. His soul mate.
He finally realized he needed to breathe and managed to pull away from her
slightly, basking in the glow of wonder, and of love, shining from her eyes.
He gently stroked a finger across her cheek, pushing a stray strand of hair
back behind her ear. He didn't know what to say, words escaped him. Suddenly,
she smiled at him, and he knew.
"Sorry I'm late. It took me forever to get here."
He'd seen the overwhelming love shine like a beacon from her eyes, and her
next words floored him.
"I know what you mean."
And he knew she did. They'd both been waiting for this moment all their
lives. They'd had a hard road getting to this point, but somehow, they'd made
it. They'd found each other. He knew he'd never be happier than at this
moment. And for the rest of his life. And with that, he leaned back down and
pulled her into his arms, bringing their lips together again.
As the world faded away from him, only one thought remained clear in his
mind. He'd found his 'penguin.' And neither of them would ever be lonely
again.
* * *
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