Chapter 23

 

She sat the empty champagne flute down on the white cloth covered table and picked up another glass.  So far the party had been alright.  Not too many comments had made their way to her ears but she had seen people staring at them.  Her sister had pretty much ignored her, which was not uncommon.  Fernando had come over at one point and invited her and Justin out for brunch the next morning.  She was thankful they already had plans with her father so she could decline his offer.  But the more the night progressed the more she wondered if the golfing trip the next day would be a bad idea.

 

At least for her to tag along.

 

The first hour of the party was ok.  Of course, they didn’t get to the party until about an hour after it officially began.  It was on purpose. Darcy didn’t want to be there with all her mother’s over punctual friends.  She watched in laughter out her window as she got ready.  Her mother and sister were frantically trying to help the caterers and workers cover the dance area with a tent.  Clouds had covered the sky in the late afternoon and distant sounds of thunder kept the party planners on edge.  It had yet to rain, but she knew it was coming.  She had waited and finally descended the steps with Tina to find Justin waiting in the sitting room with Reynolds, who had the night off. 

 

The expression on his face made her feel like she was in a movie.  He was speechless and she was as well.  He had brought a tux with him.  It fit him nicely and she gave him a huge hug and kissed him not caring that it took some shine off her lip gloss.  Her gown was a strapless lavender dress that flowed to the floor and she knew she looked good against his black tuxedo.

 

But as soon as they had entered the party, as soon as the stringed lights and the sounds of the band playing old classic songs could be heard, it happened.  The champagne was flowing, people were dancing and her mother stole him from her, leaving her in the dust to find someone to talk to.  She watched as her mother introduced him to people and they stared at him, not listening to a word he said and only looking at his face and body.  It made her giggle to see all these older women lust after her man. 

 

A little later he had come by to see her once he was free from her mother’s grasp.  They drank champagne and she pointed out some people she knew and some people he might have heard of before.  She kept trying to introduce him to her sister. but she was so occupied with greeting other people it was a lost cause.

 

He was about to ask her to dance.  She knew it.  He had sat his glass down on a small table off to the side where they were standing and reached for her hand.  But then her dad came by.  He wanted to introduce Justin to some people. Thirty minutes passed and she didn’t know here he was in the mass of people.  For a little bit she talked with her cousin’s who had flown up from their home in Blacksburg, Virginia.  They had left her there after the normal “what’s been going on in your life” chit chat to find her mother.  She was consumed with boredom. Then Justin reappeared, having some serious discussion laced with random laughter with her father on the other side of the dance floor that surrounded the fountain in the east gardens. 

 

She would have almost died from the boredom if he wasn’t there for her to look at and admire from afar.  Being able to look at his handsome body was quite entertaining. 

 

Whatcha staring at little sis?”

 

She jumped at her sister’s voice and almost spilt her still fizzling champagne on her dress.  “God, hi.”

 

“Hey,” She paused and Darcy wanted to punch her sister for staring at her with such narrowed eyes.  Whatcha staring at?

 

“My boyfriend,” She said confidently, taking a sip.

 

“So, you are dating a pop star.”

 

Darcy brought the glass from her lips and eyed her sister.  She was looking over at their father and Justin with a raised eyebrow and an unusual stare.  “Why do you say it like that?”

 

“Just didn’t think he was your type.”  She shrugged and picked up two glasses, “Thought you liked preppy normal boys.”

 

“Like you know my type,” She rolled her eyes.  She and her sister had barely had a real conversation about anything for about ten years and she thought it very odd that she’d come talk to her about this now.  Of course there was no ‘how are you’ in the conversation, no ‘how’s California’.  No, Darcy knew what this was all about.  This was about their dad liking her boyfriend more than her sister’s fiancé.

 

She was jealous and Darcy almost laughed at the stupidity of it.

 

“Don’t fight with me.”  Her sister gritted out, “This is my day.”

 

“Yes dear.” Darcy laughed.

 

“You’re so bitchy sometimes.  This is my day, ya know?  I haven’t seen you in years.”

 

Darcy passed her sister a bored look, “It’s been three months Emily.”

 

“Whatever!  God, ya know what?  I’m glad you can’t go tomorrow.  I don’t want you and your damn depressed attitude around.”

 

Her sister stalked off but changed her steps light and graceful as soon as someone turned to look at her.  She laughed and kissed someone’s cheeks, completely forgetting their petty little argument.  Darcy stared after her in wonderment. “Depressed?”  She laughed, took a big swig from her flute and shook her head.  “Good to see ya, Em.”

 

The champagne made her lightheaded for a moment.  She drank it a bit too fast and set down the empty glass, standing still for a moment, letting her senses come back to her.  She could handle champagne, but slowly.  The bartender started to pour her another, but she refused and made a move to turn around and stare at her boyfriend some more.

 

But before she was able to, she felt warm, strong hands slide down her arms and grab hold to her hands and a smooth, tenor voice sang softly in her ear along with the band, “I’ve tried so…not to give in, and I said to myself this affair, it never will go so well, but why should I try to resist when baby I know so well, that I’ve got you…” He kissed her ear, “under my skin…” She turned around, looking at him for a moment and then gave him a huge hug.  He pulled her quickly from her spot out to the dance floor, smiling and holding her close as he began to dance with her, still singing.  “I’d sacrifice anything come what might for the sake of having you near in spite of a warning voice, comes in the night, it repeats- it repeats in my ear…”

 

A few people around them stopped and stared but she didn’t mind the small scene they were causing.  He was there, with her and looking absolutely delicious.   “Don’t you know, you fool, you never can win, use your mentality, wake up to reality,” He spun her and smiled, “and each time I do, just the thought of you, makes me stop before I begin, cause I’ve got you under my skin.”

 

He pulled her close and swayed with her and she kissed him briefly and then said, “I’ve been wanting to dance with you all night.”

 

“I’m all yours now.”  He smiled at her, “Sorry your parents stole me.”

 

“It’s ok.”

 

They swayed together for the rest of the song and when it was over she felt content standing there in his arms, smelling his neck and his intoxicating cologne.  She had moved her hands and arms through the inside of his jacket and around his middle.  She kissed his neck and sighed, and he asked in response to her immense amount of affection, “How much champagne have you had?”

 

She pulled away, “Enough.”

 

“I think I need a little more.” 

 

She took his hand and pulled him a little away from where people were starting to dance to a new song.  Someone with a tray full of champagne flutes walked past and she snatched one and handed it to him.  “Here…”  He winked at her and took a long swallow.  “Chug, chug,” She chanted and he pulled away laughing.

 

Ya know,” He licked his lips and looked at the bubbly glass.  “I don’t really see what people like in champagne.”

 

“Me either.  I mean, it’s alright but not great.” 

 

He quickly finished off the glass and then set it down on a table and reached for her hand.  “Lets dance some more.”  He smiled and she bit her lip in excitement.

 

He swung her around on the dance floor and grabbed her waist with one hand and clasped her hand with the other as the band began to play one of her favorite songs from parties like these, “I’ll Dream of You Again.”  She rested her head on his shoulder and asked, “So what did mom and dad talk to you about?”

 

“Your mom showed me off.  I didn’t get any bad comments.  In fact, I think they were all checking me out, not to be arrogant.” She smiled at the laughter that rumbled in his chest.  She felt comfortable there against him.

 

“Oh they were.”  She pulled her head away and kiss him lightly and said, “I watched.”

 

He smiled at her, licked his lips and leaned back down for another kiss.  She couldn’t remember ever feeling more at ease at one of her parents’ parties.  She never would have kissed one of her former boyfriends out where everyone and anyone could see.  She would have been embarrassed or too shy.  But with him, with him there was no humiliation, there was no reason to hold back.  She was happy, and she didn’t give a damn about what anyone else thought.  “Your dad and I talked about places in New York and Los Angeles and golf.  He’s so awesome and down to earth, Darcy.”

 

She was glad he liked her dad.  “That’s why him and mom don’t get along.  She’s up in the clouds and he’s not.”

 

“I don’t think he hates her as much as you think.”

 

She pulled back and stared at him hard, surprised he would say such a thing. “What?”

 

“I don’t know.”  He shrugged.  “We talked about women, too.  You and your momma, he seems to admire you both.  I mean, I think she annoys him but, everyone annoys everyone at some time.”

 

She pulled her hand out of his and put it up around his neck with her other one. “You don’t annoy me,” She flirted.

 

“Shit…”  He rolled his eyes.

 

“Ok,” She laughed as his hands moved around from her waist to the small of her back.  “Sometimes you do.”

 

“Like when?”

 

“Well, I mean, not a lot.”  She looked off to the side and thought about all he did that annoyed her.  Everything she could think of was so silly and stupid and usually ended up with her not annoyed but amused by him.  “Little things, like you have the hardest time waking up in the mornings sometimes and I hate it when you crack your knuckles.  But…”  She licked her lips and looked up at him and he was looking at her without a smile, studying her, waiting to hear what she would say.  “Mainly I guess, sometimes you get serious.  Like really intensely serious at very random times and it sometimes makes me feel weird.”

 

He looked away from her completely defeated,  I’m sorry.”

 

“I mean, it’s not bad.” She quickly added, trying not to make him too sensitive about his intensity.  “Not now.  At first it kind of scared me.  Now, now it just shows me how much…”

 

“How much I love you.”

 

She gulped.

 

He had said it so easily and honestly that she was taken back.  She knew it.  She knew he felt that way, but she had yet to hear it actually come out of his mouth.  He had tried in the past week to tell her, but she always knew it was coming and cut him off, not ready to hear that just yet.  He didn’t give her a chance this time.  He purposefully wanted her to hear those words and now that she had heard them she couldn’t control the emotions in her heart and stuttered out, “Y-yeah,” trying her best not to let tears come to her eyes.

 

She knew that sometime soon it would happen, but she wasn’t prepared for it.  She took a deep breath.  It was time for her to deal with it, time for her to grow up and accept what had happened between them and enjoy it, instead of pushing it away. 

 

“Is, is that ok?” He spoke quickly.  “I mean, I know we’ve only…”

 

“I know you love me,” She said.

 

He softened his tone and pulled her close, leaning down to whisper in her ear, “I have for a while Darcy.”

 

“I see that now and…” She took a deep breath and held him tightly, “and at first it scared me.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Cause…”  She pulled back and looked up at him, searching his blue eyes as he looked down at her with worry.  She felt horrible.  This was supposed to be a perfect moment.  They were supposed to confess their love and be happy, but now he was worried and she was still trying to sort out her heart and mind.  “Cause dammit Justin!”  She laughed a little but wasn’t feeling very humorous.  “I’ve been bored this whole night, standing off to the side just watching you.  But that’s ok, cause I got to watch you.  And I’m not saying that I don’t have fears.  I very well could be rushing or pushing into something too fast, but…” She caught herself before going any further.  Her eyes widened and she rested her head on his chest so he couldn’t see how crazy she was in that moment.

 

She wanted to squeal and cry and hold him but she was terrified and wanted to push him away from her.  It was too much, too perfect and this sort of perfection wasn’t supposed to happen to her. 

 

“But…”  He said, hoping she’d finish.  She felt horrible for leaving him hanging, but she didn’t know what to say.  She couldn’t tell him she loved him.  Could she?  “Darcy?”

 

She had to.  It was how she felt.  No, it was how she was.  She was in love with him and he deserved to know.  “Do you wanna go for a walk?”

 

Her eyes watched his thoughts change.  At first he looked confused and worried and then his features relaxed.  He trusted her and he nodded slowly, and moved his hand down to hers and locked their fingers “Ok…”

-------

 

They had been strolling along, underneath the tall trees down by the lake for a while.  She had held his hand the entire way and neither of them said anything.  She listened as it thundered around them a bit.  Sounds from the party were distant but she could still hear the hum of people having a good time and the light sound of music drifting through the yard.

 

She tried to breathe easy, but every time she took a deep breath she felt like it did nothing for her, only made her crave fresh air even more.  It was dark as they walked and she could hear the lapping of the lake a few hundred feet to her left.   She was content in their silence, happy that he wasn’t asking her questions or prying to find out what was going on with her.

 

She knew he knew, but she couldn’t find it in herself to tell him anything.  They walked along a little bit and finally she felt his hand slip from hers and she turned from where she was walking ahead, her dress dragging on the grass and getting ruined.  He was standing a few feet behind her and she could see through the dark and knew his face was full of concern.

 

“Are you ok?” He asked cautiously.

 

“Yeah.”

 

He laughed uncomfortably and she watched him scratch his head and rub the back of his neck, “You’re kind of scaring me here, babe.”

 

“Oh…”  She turned away from him and looked out at the lake.  The lights from their dock about a half a mile away were reflecting on the water and giving a tiny bit of light along with the lights from the house.  “I’m sorry.”

 

He didn’t move towards her when she crossed her arms over her chest and rubbed them, feeling a little chill hit her as a breeze floated underneath the trees they were walking near.  After a few awkward, quiet moments she felt a spot of water hit her arm and then one on her cheek.

 

Sure enough a second later she felt his hands on her shoulders.  He squeezed them and said, “It’s starting to sprinkle a little, maybe we should get back…”  She moved her shoulders to shrug his hands away and walked away from him.  “Darcy…”  He said forcefully, grabbing her arm, “What is it?”

 

Spots of water were setting into her silken dress but she didn’t care.  She stared at him and felt her eyes water as she admitted, “I lied to you.”

 

“What?”

 

She stepped to him and looked straight at his black vest and then up at his eyes.  “You asked me if I was a princess.  I said no.   But dammit Justin,  She shook her head.  “I’m not supposed to feel this way.  It’s not supposed to be this perfect.  You make me feel like I’m that damned princess.”

 

He licked his lips and eyed her suspiciously.  He looked a bit frightened, as if he was as terrified of what she was going to say as she was.  “What?”

 

“Us.” She laughed and turned away from him, feeling the rain come down a bit steadier.  It was silly for them to stay out there in the rain like this, but she didn’t care.  She wanted to be completely alone with him and this was the only place that seemed logical at the moment.  “It’s just, everything is perfect.  My parents love you, my brother tolerates you, my sister,” She shook her head and rolled her eyes.  “Well my sister is an alien so she doesn’t count.”  She turned back around and looked at him full of honesty, putting her hands on his chest and saying, “But, you’re just sexy and beautiful and kind and you worship me and make me feel like I’m some fucking goddess.  You love me.  God, for the first time in my life I have a man who really, truly loves me for who I am and nothing else.”

 

“Darcy…”

 

She cut him off, “And that terrifies me.  I keep looking for the fault, for the problem, for the secret that’s gonna ruin us.  Nothing can be this perfect Justin.” His face fell and he nodded slowly, as if he was doing his best to accept rejection.  She dipped her head to catch his gaze and smiled at him. “At least, I use to not think so…”

 

He eyed her for a moment and then a small smile broke out in the corner of his lips and he put his hand against her cheek, “Darcy, how much champagne did you drink?”

 

“Three glasses over two hours maybe.  I’ve been drinking it since I was ten.”  He raised his eyebrows and she widened her eyes at him, “Justin I’m not drunk.”

 

He looked up for a moment and ran his hand through his hair and then ran his hands down his tuxedo arms, throwing off the water that was beading up against his suit.  “Baby…” He sighed, “We should get inside.”  He shrugged his jacket off and held it over him and her so it could be a fo-umbrella for them. 

 

She pushed him away.  She wasn’t going to hide from the rain and she was tired of hiding from her feelings.  She was going to suck it up and finally get it out.  Dammit Justin!  No!  I’m not going inside.”  His arms slowly dropped and he held his jacket in his hand, staring at her hard.  “I’m gonna stand right here and tell you that for the first fucking time I love someone.”  She felt herself start to cry a little and wiped at her eyes as his shoulders fell and she stared at him.  “I love you.  Don’t you get it?”

 

She watched his chest start to move as his breathing picked up and she stepped closer to him.  “Every guy I’ve been with before, I thought I loved him.  I thought I loved him and I gave into him and let him control me.  But that that wasn’t love.  That was obsession or something sick like that.  This, what we have, is true.  It’s real.”  He started to smile a bit.  “It’s not something in my imagination or something I make up in my dreams.”  His smile left him and she grabbed his face and looked at him dead on, feeling like she wanted to shake the feeling into him so he knew how much she felt for him.  “I don’t go to bed at night reading into everything you said that day and turning it around into maybe being love.  I know it.  I don’t have to do that with you like I did with everyone else.”

 

“Darcy…” He whispered.

 

She shook her head and stood up on her tiptoes, “Just shut up…”  Her lips melted with his and she kissed him with all the passion she could find in her body.  He held her tightly as their mouths moved together.  It took a while for them to pull away.  She couldn’t get enough of him and knew right there in that moment that she needed to have him.  She needed him to be with her, for as long as he could. 

 

She needed it.

 

He pulled away breathless, pressing his forehead into hers and looking her dead on.  “Y-you love me?”  He asked shocked, amazed, and in utter awe.

 

She felt the tears that had been threatening, fall with her bright smile and she whispered, “Yes…”

 

The sigh he gave out and the change in his body seemed like he had been cramped, curled up in a ball for a year and finally was getting the opportunity to stretch.  He had been waiting for this.  She could tell.  He pulled her against him and he felt good, wet and cold, but damn good.  “You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to hear that.”

 

“How long?”  She asked as a roll of thunder rumbled above them.

 

“I don’t know, but it feels like forever.”

 

“I’m sorry I’m ruining your tuxedo.”

 

He cupped her cheek in his hand and smiled at her, saying, “Do you think I fucking care…”

 

He dipped his head down to bring his lips to hers.  It was raining hard and thundering and it was probably really stupid of them to stay out there getting soaked, ruining their clothes and standing underneath trees as it thundered.  But that didn’t matter.  Nothing mattered.  He was kissing her, really kissing her now, letting them slowly savor this moment. 

 

They were in love and they knew it.

 

She pulled his coat away from his hands and let it fall to the wet grass.  She felt like undressing the rest of him out there, but before she could take off his vest or tie, her thin heels started to pierce the rain soft soil and she almost lost her balance.  He caught her, of course, holding his hands against her hips and body.  She knew he was staring at her while she held on to him and took off her strappy stilettos.  Once they were off and tossed to the glass she looked at him.  He was soaked, water dripping off his nose and chin.  His hair had curled up a bit in the downpour and his lips were wet.  She couldn’t believe such an incredibly beautiful person was hers.

 

She smiled at him and he slowly began to return it and then she leaped for him.  Her hands ran over his shoulders and his neck up through his hair as she kissed him, and his hands moved over her body, caressing her back and pulling her flush against him.  His lips moved down over her cheek and her neck to kiss her there.

 

He kept her close and whispered against the skin of her shoulder, “You make me happy Darcy, you make me whole.”

 

She looked over his shoulder as he kept softly kissing her shoulder and neck and could see the party still going on in full force in the distance.  The lights were still on and despite the thunder and the rain she could still hear the faint sound of a Sinatra classic coming from underneath one of the illuminated tents. 

 

Suddenly she didn’t want to be wet anymore.  She didn’t want to be outside ruining her dress and getting her feet dirty and having the wet grass sting her blisters the damned shoes caused her.  But she still wanted him with her.

 

A few minutes later they were laughing as they approached the house, running, trying to escape the rain that had already done plenty damage.  Darcy took his hand and ran to the side door of the kitchen and knocked since it was locked. 

 

Soon, Charles opened the door for them and looked at him shocked.  “What the blazes happened to you two?”

 

“What do you think, doofus?”  She smiled at him as they entered the kitchen to find a few of the house workers at a table drinking a few drinks and playing Monopoly.  She remembered this was their tradition on party nights at the Heights and often, when she was young, she would sneak down and play with them.  She held Justin’s hand tightly and noticed he was only looking at her, smiling a smile that she wanted to live inside.  He was happy, truly happy and she had made him that way.  

 

“Hey, don’t you go dripping water all over this house!”  One of them called as they left the kitchen, through the breakfast room out to the main hallway.

 

“Too late,” She called back laughing and pulling his hand as she walked quickly through the downstairs of the house.  They ascended the steps and she was happy no one was in sight to ridicule her for being wet, with her boyfriend, and tracking dirt and rainwater through the house.  She didn’t give a damn.  She only cared about him and how important this night was to their relationship.

 

She couldn’t get over it.  They really were in love. 

 

“Come on,” She said as he stopped at the second level.

 

“I need a shower.”

 

“I do, too.”  She bit her lip in a flirtatious manner.

 

He shook his head.  “I should probably go down to my room.”

 

“No…”  She shook her head forcefully and turned, pulling him with her up the steps.  She made a point of taking no time to talk or discuss anything.  She was going to get him alone, and she wasn’t going to let him convince her otherwise.  The door to her room was shut a minute later and he stood in her room looking uncomfortable.  His white shirt was sticking to his body and she could see his skin underneath it.  Water was dripping from his hair down his temples and his black shoes were covered in wet grass and specs of dirt. 

 

“I need to go get out of this,” He said.

 

She held him close to her and said, “Stay…”  She pulled back and looked up at him, suddenly terrified of the rejection he might pass her way.  “Please.”

 

“Are you sure?”  He asked in a whisper, “I don’t want your dad or someone coming in again.”

 

“He won’t.”  When the right side of his mouth lifted into a half smile she wanted to jump for joy.  She had been waiting and waiting, and waiting for this. 

 

She brought him into a kiss and used his distracted state to unbutton his vest and slide it from his shoulders.  His tie was discarded next, thrown to the floor with her heels and his jacket and vest.  She began to slowly unbutton his white shirt.  They were kissing heavily, breathing harshly.  It was like they were trying to devour the other one.  But she kept working and finally got to where she needed to unbuckle his belt and unzip his pants to get his shirt untucked.  It was when her fingers purposefully brushed against the crotch of his pants when he pulled away and asked breathlessly, “What are you doing?”

 

“You’re taking a shower with me.”  She stated, hoping that without involving a question he wouldn’t have the opportunity to say no. 

 

Ohhh really?”  He asked with excitement.

 

“And then…”  She took a deep breath and stared into his eyes as his playfulness disappeared and he seemed to understand her seriousness.  “We’re gonna dry each other off, and get in bed and…”  She paused and looked down at his chest for a moment before back into his blue eyes.  She knew it was a dangerous thing saying this, but she was tired of being cautious and tried of making herself wait with him.  They were in love and they had every right to express that in whatever way they wanted.  “And then, then I want you to make love to me.”

 

“D-darcy….” She didn’t look at him, but stared at his neck as he swallowed hard.  Fear invaded her.  She had never been rejected by a man, even though at times she wished they had turned her down.  But now, with him, she knew that if he said no she wouldn’t be able to live with herself. 

 

She looked at him with tears starting to flow from her eyes and he quickly changed his look into one of concern.  She looked away from him, embarrassed that she was crying and ashamed that she had asked him to be with her.  But then he leaned down and she felt a kiss against her cheek and then her other, right under her eyes.  And then he kissed her lips and brought her in his arms.

 

She felt his hands on her back and then they moved, pulling and picking at something.  He pulled away and her eyes widened a little at his small smile.  His eyes were lowered in a look of desire and she felt his hand slide slowly down her spine, pulling something as he went.  Her dress started to loosen and he whispered, “God, I love you.”

 

Without the support of the material being perfectly fitted to her body the dress easily pooled down at her feet and she was left there in only her small thong and her strapless bra.

 

“The things they make you ladies wear,” He said.  She smiled and quickly reached behind her to take it off.  If she knew they were going to be doing this tonight, she would have worn a teddy underneath her gown instead of her awkward looking flesh colored strapless bra.   “Much better,” he said and moved his hands over her, touching her breasts and making her sigh.  She didn’t realize how cramped they have been in that thing until now.  She decided while he’d enjoy her she’d work to get him equally as unclothed and moved to finally unbutton and unzip his slacks.  “What are you doing?”

 

“Taking your pants off,” She smiled and winked at him.

 

“I bet this tux is ruined.”

 

He bent down to untie his shoes and slid them off before stepping out of the pants that had bunched at his feet.  “My mom is gonna kill me about this dress,” She replied.

 

“You looked so good in it.  But,” He smiled and pulled off his white shirt, leaving him in a white wife beater and black boxer briefs.  “Doesn’t compare with you now.”

 

“Maybe we should skip the shower,” She breathed out, moving her hands up his stomach and chest as he pulled off his wife beater and his body was exposed to her.  His skin felt good against her fingertips.  The material fell to the floor and she kissed his chest, feeling him wrap his arms around her, making their cold, damp bodies press together. 

 

“I’d like to take a shower with you.”  The sound of his low voice sent shivers through her body and she pulled away slowly to walk towards her bathroom, glancing over her shoulder once, to make sure he was following her.  He was.

 

He felt her up in the bathroom, holding her tightly from behind as she got the shower to work.  His hands massaged her breasts and reached down to cup her through her panties.  She could feel him, feel how much he wanted her and it made her almost pass out from excitement.   He seemed amazed by the amount of bobby pins she removed from her hair and she shut him up by taking off her last bit of clothing and moving her hands to his hips to do the same for him.  She expected him to seduce her in the shower.  She expected foreplay, touching and a hell of a lot more kissing.  But instead he washed her hair and her body, taking his time making sure she was well suds up before pushing her underneath the stream of water. 

 

She had wanted to do the same for him, to wash him and caress him and take her time and love him but when she opened her eyes from being completely rinsed off, he was there, completely covered in bubbles from head to toe, sporting a bright grin.  If the seriousness of knowing they were about to make love that night wasn’t encompassing her she would have had a soap fight with him and made fun of him.  But she just laughed and moved so he could rinse himself off.

 

She memorized his body. She studied his freckles and his muscles.  His arms were perfect and his hands large and looked like they had seen a lot more work than he had probably ever used them for.  His back curved inward perfectly right above his ass and the small of his back was defined by two lines.  Her eyes smiled as she eyed his butt and she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him, pressing her front into his backside and stepping up on her toes to kiss his strong neck. 

 

The water was shut off and she couldn’t help herself and let one of her hands slide down over his stomach and touch him where she knew he so desperately wanted to be touched.  He groaned and she felt that noise vibrate inside of her.  He felt good in her hand, solid, heavy and thick.  Thoughts of having that inside of her made her start to ache.  “I want you,” She whispered against the back of his shoulders, kissing his freckles there.

 

He turned around on the slick surface and linked his hands with hers, pulling her against him, feeling her and letting her do the same with him.  It was quiet except for an occasional drip from the faucet or off their own bodies.  He was warm and hard and it felt good to have his hand on her back as his other one ran through her wet hair.  He kept looking at her, staring at her face, touching her, moving his fingers from her hair to her lips and her cheeks. 

 

“You don’t realize how much I want this Darcy.  I’ve been dreaming about it longer than you know.”

 

She didn’t know what to say to him and couldn’t speak when he opened the glass door to the shower and walked out, bringing her with him.  His gaze didn’t move from her face, even when he reached over to the rack of white and lavender towels.  He held one open for her and she stepped forward, letting him wrap it around her as his arms hugged her.  There was something about having him dry her off that made her start to breathe heavy and made her get that bubble of emotion creep up in her throat.  He was worshipping her, studying her body closely and mesmerized by it.

 

“Stop…”  She made out as he was working on her legs, feeling herself start to cry.

 

“What’s wrong?” He rushed out.

 

She shook her head and hopefully his worry went away when he stood up. “Absolutely nothing.”  She put her hands on his bare chest and leaned her forehead on it. “God, why are you being so perfect?”

 

“I…I…”  He struggled with what to say, and when she looked up at his face she knew he was concerned about ruining their evening.  But nothing could ruin it.

 

“Forget drying off, I need you.”

 

He smiled a little and asked her, “Don’t you want to make it last?”

 

“I do.  But dammit Justin, I just…”  She felt like whining or stomping her feet.  She wanted to kiss him and touch him and do all those things that are supposed to lead up to sex, but for her, right then, all those things seemed to be getting in her way of being truly intimate with him.  She wanted them to be inside each other.

 

She had never had a very idealistic notion about sex.  She never really thought of it anything more than a pleasure device.  But now, with him, the idea of being connected, being completely at each other’s mercy, letting them see each other at their most primal, rudest, and embarrassing state was something she really wanted to share with him.  She wanted to be with him, in him.

 

“Hold on…” He seemed to understand her eagerness and took another towel from the rack and started to speedily rub it over himself, smiling at her in the process.  She towel dried her hair as he rubbed the material vigorously over his body and down his legs up to shake over his head.  “Ok there…”  He sighed and she took his towel and hers and hung them up on a bare towel bar on the shower door. 

 

When she turned back to face him she was met with his mouth.  He kissed her sweetly and then she felt herself being hoisted up.  She laughed at first and then gave him a curious look, “What are you doing?”

 

“Carrying my princess.” He smiled cradling her in his arms with one under the hook of her legs and the other across her back.

 

She rolled her eyes as he eased her down on the mattress, “You’re never letting that go are you?”

 

“I see no reason to.” Watching his naked body crawl over hers sent her body into overdrive, and when he pressed himself down upon her and kissed her she groaned in satisfaction.  His hands ran over her body, touching her breasts and skimming down her sides.  He pulled himself off her a bit to lie by her side and she almost died when he didn’t stop from kissing her, only deepened their connection by slipping his hand in between her legs and pushing a finger inside of her. 

 

She turned her head from him because she couldn’t help it.  She couldn’t control herself and having to kiss him and have him touch her was too much, too fast.  She tried to breathe his name but nothing would come out, and he moved his lips to her neck and then down to her breast. 

 

He didn’t do her much longer and brought his hand away from her to rub up against her stomach and then touch her breast as he kissed the other.  He looked up at her with a childish smile, pushing himself into her leg and hip. She was completely content.  Her gaze moved around at her bed.  Memories and thoughts came into her mind and she reached her hand down from where it had been fisted in the comforter to his head, pulling on the back of his hair to get him to stop kissing her body.

 

“Stop for a second.” He pulled away slowly and looked at her, trying his best to be patient.  When she looked down at him, taking in all of his naked body, she knew he was doing a damn good job lasting.  He was rock hard, sticking up and she knew he wanted so badly to just sink inside of her.  She pulled away from him and pushed herself on her knees, shuffling herself to the bed post at the end of her bed.  “Ok…” She glanced back at him and he was laying up against the pillows, watching her, lazily stroking himself.  She gulped at the erotic sight and turned back around to the bedpost.  She worked at the velvety knot that was holding the sheer curtains to the post.  “I’ve always, well, when I was little I’d pull these curtains closed and really think I was a princess of some castle.”  She moved to the other bedpost and did the same.  “I know that’s so stupid but I…” She couldn’t help herself and glanced back again.   He wasn’t touching himself any more but was staring at her, smiling and working on the curtains at the head of the bed.  “I always wanted to do it again, but when I got older I got lazy and none of the guys I was with wanted to wait long enough to…” She turned around to face him and rested her body back against her heels.

 

They were completely enclosed by the curtains, alone, in their own little haven.  He pulled the comforter and sheets back from where they were tucked under the pillows and slid himself inside.

 

She gulped when he pushed everything but the sheet off his lower body and held out a hand for her.  “This is really happening.”

 

She took his hand and was pulled straight against him, the sheet preventing them from further contact.  He kissed her and said, “I can’t believe it either.”

 

The sheets were soon pushed down to the foot of the bed, bunched up with the comforter.  She touched him and kissed him, making him sigh her name and whisper that he loved her.  She didn’t do it for long and moved her hand up his body and down his arms, pulling him over top of her and spreading her legs so he would get the idea.  But he didn’t.  He just rested against her, pressing into her but not pushing inside.  He kissed her slowly and pulled away to kiss down her body. 

 

It felt good, it felt more than good.  It was heaven and she would have loved to just lay there and accept it.  But the more she did the more anxious she got.  The more it built inside of her and she felt she was going to explode.  “Justin…” He stopped and she knew by the tone in her voice he immediately thought he had done something wrong.  She pushed him away and sat up on her knees, looking at him as he pulled his long body up to a sitting position against the head board.  She reached for his hands and crawled over on top of him so she was straddling his lap.  She looked down and rested her weight on his thighs, careful not to put too much pressure on his erection.  She held his hands and said, “I do want this to last and I do want to savor it.  But I…”  She took a deep breath when the worry in his eyes faded and one of pure desire came through.  It made her lose her breath and she stopped thinking.

 

She felt his hands leave hers and travel to her hips, squeezing her there.  He licked his lips. “I just…”

 

She was panting and he moved his head forward to kiss her passionately. She pulled away and tried to get it out, “I need…”

 

Shh…”  He whispered, “I got you Darcy.”

 

She licked her dry lips and watched him as he trailed his finger down her stomach and thigh to in between.  She moved up on her knees and held on to his shoulders and felt him move against her, pushing the head of his penis right to where it was supposed to go.  “Shit,” She said quietly, feeling him put pressure there.

 

“Watch,” He said in a low voice.

 

She didn’t want to.  It was too much, too intense, too sexual and physical to actually see him enter her.  But she found herself looking down, glued to the most intimate parts of their bodies.  He leaned back a bit and pushed his hips slowly upward.  She could see herself and him as he entered her and she felt tears she had been holding for many, many years fall from the corners of her eyes.  He stretched her and completed her and made her feel whole.

 

God, did it feel fucking incredible.  She groaned when he moved his hands to her hips and pulled her a little off him, forcing some friction and movement to cause between them.  Her mind was wandering a mile a minute.  It was better than she could have ever thought.  She wanted to say something to him and let him know how much this meant to her, but she found herself mesmerized by the feeling of him making love to her.  It was the best thing she had ever experienced.

“You’re perfect,” He said in a whisper.

She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and neck and found herself bawling into his neck.  He felt so good and perfect, but he was so wrong.  She knew she was terribly flawed but for some reason he loved her, he found her perfect, and having him inside of her, filling her up, overwhelmed her.  “It’s too much.  Just too much.”

“What’s wrong?”

“I...”  She took a deep breath and pulled back from him to look into his eyes.  They were so blue and so loving and she wanted to be lost inside of them.  She whimpered against him, kissed him and softly said, “I love you so much.”

He held her while he made love to her.  He didn’t stop.  It felt sweet and wonderful and she held on to him, holding on for dear life as he rocked her into a slow frenzy.  She kissed his shoulders and neck but couldn’t stop herself from crying.  It was a big moment, a huge moment.  It was one of the best moments.  She had never cried during sex before, not even her very first time.  It hurt and she might have shed a tear or two, but never had she been so emotionally taken that happiness overtook her body and made her sob from the sheer power and joy of realizing she had found the one person she could really fall in love with and be with and enjoy her life with.

She had found him.

Her hands held on to him as they moved their bodies together and she felt herself tightening, felt herself climbing up that hill that would toss her into insanity.  She felt his lips against her neck and his sighs against her face and pulled from where she had been resting against his shoulder to look at him.  She smiled weakly when she saw tears against his face as well. 

She realized, she not only had found him, but he had found her as well.  She wouldn’t ever let him go and she wasn’t going to let them lose each other.

No matter what.

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