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2. A small piece of sodium which lived in a testube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Bunsen! my flame! I melt whenever I see you" said the sodium.The bunsen burner replied :"It's just a phase you're going through". 3. Heisenberg is out for a drive when he's stopped by a traffic cop. The cop says: " Do you know how fast you were going? Heisenberg replies: "No, but I know where I am". 4. A neutron walks into a bar; he asks the bartender: " How much for a beer?" The bartender looks at him and says: "For you, it's no charge". 5. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? - Because it was polar. 6. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? - A one molar solution. 7. What do dipoles say in passing? - Have you got a moment? 8. Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak? - Because it's in the ground state. 9. What do you do with a dead chemist? - Barium 11. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? - They're cheaper than day rates. 12. What happens when electrons lose their energy? - They get Bohr'd. 13. What did one titration tell the other? - Let's meet at the endpoint. 14. Why are chemists great for solving problems? - They have all the solutions. 15. Do you know what happened to the chemist who was reading a book about Helium? - He just couldn't put it down. 16. A florence flask was getting dressed for the opera. All of a sudden she screamed: "Erlenmeyer, my joules! Somebody has stolen my joules!". The husband replied: "Take it easy honey, do not overreact. We'll find a solution". 17. Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia? - Because it's basic stuff. 18. What is a cation afraid of? - A dogion.
