BRB Round 3: Vulcan Raven vs. Nakedman

 

In the Trailer of CBF Representative, Vulcan Raven…

 

 

Vulc – So, you said that is guy is really Naked?

 

Vader – Yeah, I don’t know anything more about him then you. That’s just what I heard.

 

Vulc – Aren’t there laws against that?

 

Vader – I’d think so. But then again I think that there are laws against Cock-Fighting too.

 

Vulc- Oh, okay. But the point that you are trying to make is that this CWO guy wears no clothing at all and I will have to fight a man with no clothes.

 

Vader – Don’t look at me. I’m not an expert on unclothed men.

 

Vulc – That’s not what I heard.

 

Vader – Shutup.

 

Vulc – Ahh, clothes or no clothes, I am going to kick his butt.

 

Vader – Yeah, we will teach him a lesson that he will never forget… unplug.

 

Vulc – …WAIT! Did you just say ‘unplug?’

 

Vader – Ummm, no.

 

Vulc – Yes you did. Vader- we are in the Covenant now, remember- not the Barn. The Barn is totally dead. You know what the problem is? Inactivity, that’s what. Maybe if you were more active on the CBF Board then you would know what the hell is going on… AND MAYBE we wouldn’t have been stripped of the Tag Championships due to your inactivity.

 

Vader – Hey, hey, hey… I don’t see how you are so active, are you even running any sort of plotline right now?

 

Vulc – Of course I am, I’m running my plotline with Triumph, the insult comic dog. Me and him are kicking total butt. But this loser named Orion Pax has started to bring out the Pets.Com Dog and now I have to beat some sense into him.

 

Vader  - Orion who? Feuding with nobodies doesn’t count.

 

Vulc – He’s like the leader of some stable or something… I think he… oh yeah, your right. He is a loser. Look, lets stop arguing. People are trying to tear us apart. We’ve got to remain unified. We never fell apart like this is the CRF!

 

Vader – Yeah, but the CRF sucked, we totally ruled that place.

 

Vulc – Well yeah, but I… hey, speaking of Triumph, where did he get off to?

 

Both of the slammers start to look around. They cannot seem to find him anywhere.

 

Vulc – I know he was here earlier.

 

Vulc stands up and begins to search around the room. Suddenly he notices some sheets in the corner. They are going up and down, up and down quickly. Vulc grabs a stick (yes- he has a stick in the room) and pulls the sheet from underneath.

 

Triumph – Oh yes! Oh yes! You know you like to be humped. Oh… you are such a brutal whore!

 

Triumph is doggy-style (what else) on top of a brown-spotted Yorkshire Terrier. He stops humping and gives a funny look to Vulc, with his mouth hanging open. A cigar falls out.

 

Vulc – Triumph, what the hell are you doing?

 

Triumph – What does it look like I am doing you bag of poop? I am boning this Yorkshire that I met at the Westminster Dog Show. Little do most people know, but Yorkshires are the horniest bitches alive.

 

Vulc – Hey now, watch the language.

 

Triumph – What? I can say that word!! It means female dog! This is a female dog that I am humping, what is your problem you tightass?!

 

Vulc – Nevermind, just get ready to come with me into the Convenience Store as my manager.

 

Vader – Pssst! Guys… A funny feeling just came to me.

 

Triumph – What?! Are you being sexually serviced by a coyote or something?

 

Vader – No Triumph.

 

Vulc – So what is it Vader?

 

Vader – I can’t help but feel… feel… feel like we are being watched.

 

Vulc – That’s ridiculous. Who would be watching us?

 

Vader – I don’t know. I just have that feeling though… I can’t help it.

 

Vulc – Whatever. Well anyway, Triumph and me are going now. Wish us luck because we don’t want to lose like you did in Bar Room Brawl 9.

 

Vader – Yeah, I know you… HEY!

 

Triumph – Ahh, before we go I have one very important question to ask.

 

Vulc – What’s that Triumph?

 

Triumph – Anyone care for a hump?

 

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The camera to Vulcan Raven’s Trailer cuts off, and we are taken back to the studios…

 

Dale: Well that was… err… interesting.

 

Chip: Yeah, sorry about that. Maybe this hidden camera thing isn’t such a great idea anyway. How about we not go to Nakedman’s hidden camera.

 

Grimm: You know what – I just remembered something. Nakedman and his friends don’t even have a Trailer. They trashed the last one we put them in and made ludicrous demands to the caterers.

 

Chip: Really? What were they?

 

Grimm: They demanded 100,000 Bags of M&M’s with all of the blue ones taken out. So… I decided not to give them a trailer this time. They will just be standing around outside, waiting to be let into the store.

 

Dale: So do we have a camera crew waiting out there to see what is going on with them?

 

Grimm: Yeah, I guess. But do we really have to go out there?

 

Chip: I think we have to provide equal time for both slammers you know.

 

Dale: Yeah- that’s the rule.

 

Grimm: Okay, whatever, lets go see what Nakedman is doing…

 

Continued with the AoD

 

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