---------
In the meantime, Neoprene is looking around
the dirt and woodchip covered grounds to see if there is an iron gauntlet just
sitting around.
Neoprene: Nein! NEIN!
NEIN! Vhere ist it? I must finden it!
He spots a little manmade pond, with a bridge
over it. There is no reason for the structure at all but for decorative effect…
but it still brings up an interesting possibility.
Neoprene: CRAPEN! Das
gauntlet could be in zhe pond. Zhis ist nein gut!
Grabbing a nearby stick (renaissance festivals
have sticks laying around), he sticks it into the water to gage the depth.
Neoprene: Jaaa. Das
ist nein deepen. Zhe gauntlet could nicht be in zhere.
*FUZZ* Comen in! *FUZZ* Hallo? …
Neo goes into a pocket within his cloak and
pulls out a valkie… I mean Walkie-Talkie.
Neoprene: I zhought I
told ju to only call vhen it is immediate!
Anya: *FUZZ*… Ja.
Das ist important. Zhe camera herrs have moven to focus in von area. Ich stehe das
Nahrungsmittelgericht bereit.
Neoprene: Ju are standing by zhe
food court?
Anya: *FUZZ* Ja. Zhis could be the area vhere the gauntlet did
landen.
Neoprene: Vhat? Bin Laden?
Anya: *FUZZ* NEIN! Did landen!
Neoprene: Ah. Jaaa. Das ist gut.
Do ju see it?
Anya: *FUZZ* Nein. But I vill continue to vatch.
Neoprene: I vill come to the
food courten soon. Zhey must have moven the cameramen for a reason.
Anya: *FUZZ* Ja. I vill tell Katya und Monika to keep looking
elsevhere. Auf Wiedersehen. *FUZZ*
Neo turns his walkie-talkie off and puts it back in the cloak. He
the starts to slowly walk towards the food court. Along the way he keeps his
eyes out for anything iron looking. Or anything glove looking. Or anything iron
glove looking especially, I guess.
---------
Spooky Ghost: OooOooo …and in the ghost world… we have advanced beyond your
primitive flesh land. We have advanced beyond rules and manners. Do you
understand? Or is your brain incapable of-
Nakedman sits on a tree stump with his head
resting on a hand, trying not to cry to himself.
Spooky Ghost: -Are you listening to me flesh man? I will now scare and amaze
you with my apparition power.
Naked: Why can’t
you just leave me alone?!
Spooky Ghost: It’s called a story arc, Nakedman. All the cool
people are doing them these days. OoOooo… you must not be cool if you dislike
them. Or dislike me. Because all I say and do is right.
Naked: YOU’RE NOT
A GHOST! You’re not undead! I don’t believe it for a second!
Spooky Ghost: This is blasphemy against me. I am very offended. Please now step
into a Porta Potty to receive your ghoulish punishment. No wait… that didn’t
sound right. Umm. OooOoo!
Naked: I STABBED
YOU WITH A SWORD AND YOU BLED!
Spooky Ghost: That was energy. Spirit Energy. Red Spirit Energy. With
hemoglobin in it. OooOooo… don’t try to understand it… your brain will explode!
Naked: Hehehe…
you’re time’s up little man. Now I’m going to tear that bed sheet right off of
you.
Spooky Ghost: It is a Specter Wall! How many times must I tell you?
OoOooooOoooo! HEY! HEY! GET OFF! STOP IT! Oo-OW!
Nakedman charges and starts grabbing at the
sheets
Naked: I don’t
need a fluorescent Neo Light to see the spunk stains on your stolen
hotel room sheet. And God I hope that little red stain in the corner doesn’t
have anything to do with menstruation cycles.
Spooky Ghost: I do not wish to talk about that. There is no story to tell. And
it certainly does not involve any of those goth girls. Uh… errm… OooOooo!
Naked: There…
I’ve almost got it. AND- HA!
Nakedman pulls the sheet off.
There is another sheet underneath.
Spooky Ghost: OooOOooo! Two lairs! How incredibly spooky! OoOOoo!
Naked: DAMNIT!
Well. It’s time to call in the Calvary.
Nakedman calls a hill outside of
Jerusalem.
Naked: *rolls eyes* …I meant “It’s
time to call in the cavalry.
Nakedman claps his hands twice.
Naked: Spooky
Ghost, I knew you’d be trouble. Which is why I brought… the NAKEDLYTES!
Out of three corners jump three Mysterious
Mystery persons.
Mysterious Mystery Person: Prepare to suffer, Casper!
Mysterious Mystery Person Dos: You’re going down like Clothed Chic after that Bon Jovi concert.
Clothed Chic: HEY!
Naked: Mysterious
CC! You’re supposed to be Mysterious!
She pulls off her mask that she didn’t want to
wear anyway.
Clothed Chic: Forget it Naked. We all might as well just reveal ourselves now.
Naked: Yeah.
You’re right. Disguises off!
The two Mysterious People rip off their
mysterious clothing to reveal…
Half-Naked Honey: That costume was sooo stuffy. Robed Girl: Yeah. But now we are freed from the bondage of excess clothes!
*giggle*… Now I’m starting to sound like you, bro. Naked: You better
not get nude. You’re my sisters. That’s gross. And why must you always wear
that bathing suit, HNH? It’s Friggin February. Half-Naked Honey: If I wore anything more, I’d hardly be Half-Naked. Would I? Naked: Hrm. You
have a point. But still, looking at my sisters all unclad? Ugh. Clothed Chic: Mmm. What about me? Naked: Icks-nay
on the ncest-iay. Clothed Chic: Oh yeah. Right. *wink* Spooky Ghost: Oh look, an armada of slutty sisters with large racks. How
original that you know have three female valets following you around. Where
could you have possibly gotten the idea from? Half-Naked Honey: Hey! I’m only his half sister! Naked: We don’t
have to take this, do we Nakedlytes? The Girls: NO! Naked: So are we
going to kick some ghost tail or what? Clothed Chic: Well, I was thinking more “what” myself, because I- Robed Girl: HI-YA! I know martial arts, ghosty! Spooky Ghost: Ah yes. And I know how to run away. Very, very fast. Oh, and by
the way… you can’t see under this sheet here, but I’ve been flipping all of you
the bird… the whole time! Naked: Hrm. So
you admit it’s a sheet, huh? Spooky Ghost: Yes, it… uhh… I mean. No. Uhh… it’s just that… WHGT! JGTH! YES!
I AM AWESOME! He runs away. Half-Naked Honey: Damn! He got away! Naked: Well,
we’ll find him again. But for now we’ve got to concentrate on finding that
gauntlet and beating Neoprene. That’s the priority. Clothed Chic: So which way do we go? Do we split up? Naked: Yes… but
lets split into two groups instead of all four of us separating. Half-Naked
Honey and Robed Girl – you go check out things in that direction. Meanwhile,
Clothed Chic and me will check things out in the direction of the men’s room
stalls. Robed Girl: Right! Lets go! And they split up. --------- Back at Broadcast Central… Davros is leaning over and talking to a
technician. Davros: …so you’re sure
that the fact that we’ve moved a bunch of the cameramen to the confirmed area
of where the gauntlet hit isn’t going to raise anyone’s suspicions? Technician: Naaaa. I mean, who would notice? It’s not like either Neoprene or
Naked has a gang of three girls with them to watch out for stuff like that. Davros: Yeah. I guess
you’re right. Technician: It’s just that… hey wait… should the Gothic Warriors really be
doing that? Virtue Knight and Count Justice, who have now
consumed waaaay too much ale, are attempting to slay the tavern. CJ: FIE! Doth thou
laugh at me, wooden post? Ha! We shalt see who doth cackle whence I cut thee
down! VK: Nay Sir Justice! If
thou do that then the whole tavern shalt collapse on us! Doth nay slay it.
Instead, challenge it to a battle of wit! CJ: AYE! Davros: Man. I think Count
Justice is about to lose a battle of wit to an upright support. This is… Whoa…
damn! Are the cameras on us?! When did this happen? I must have pushed the
wrong button! QUICK! Someone cut to Neoprene! God. I hope
the cameras didn’t catch me masturbating.