RAVE ON By Laura, in response to the first Roswell Ate My Soul fan fic challenge“Maria, it’s too hot.”
Seven black-clad figures cautiously approached a supposedly abandoned warehouse on the outskirts of Roswell. They were on a mission.
"Do you think this is really, like, safe?" Liz asked, grabbing Maria by the hand.
"Oh, safe schmafe!" Maria replied. "We wanted to spend a Friday night without Tess for once. This is as safe as it gets."
Maria proceeded toward the dark building, then stopped when she realized she was alone. Turning, arms akimbo, she called to you companions, "Well?!"
Max, Liz, Kyle, Isabel, Michael, and Alex exchanged glances. Liz opened her mouth as if to voice further concern, but closed it upon seeing a glare from her best friend.
"It's about time I start… making some… firm decisions … as leader," Max began. "Let's go." He walked to the door, opened it slowly, peered in, then opened it wider to let the others pass.
Upon entering, they were initially met with total darkness. As they blinked into the void, trying to adjust their vision, they were suddenly blinded by lights pulsing in many colors and causing them to start. Immediately following came a loud pounding noise that beat right into their chests and seemed to be keeping time with the pulsing of the lights.
"Oh!" cried Maria excitedly, "I love this song! Come on girls, we have to dance." Maria grabbed Liz and Isabel by the hands and they were soon lost in a sea of gyrating bodies.
"Great," said Alex ruefully. "Record time for losing our dates."
"At least you guys *have* dates," muttered Kyle.
Max smiled at him, but it was an evil smile. "We could have… invited … Tess… to be your date."
"No way!" "No thank you!" "Shut up, Max!"
Scanning the interior or the large warehouse, Michael quickly spotted the bar. "On that note, Maxwell, I think we all need a stiff drink."
~~~
Max, Michael, Kyle, and Alex stood staring at the short blond behind the bar. Kyle opened his mouth to speak but the shock was too great. Max wanted to hide behind Michael but, recalling his earlier decision to be more assertive, he decided against it.
"Tess… I.. we.. had.. no idea you worked as a … bartender."
The girl fixed him with a dirty look. "Yo, Maxie, don't you evah insult me like dat again. I ain't Tess. I don't look like Tess. And Gawd knows I got one hell of a lot more fashion sense den Tess!"
"Ava!" Max exclaimed, as all four boys relaxed.
After an apology was made and greetings were exchanged, Ava placed four glasses on the bar.
"Dis is a drink I invented. I call it an Antarian Tequila Lover, but dat's too long, so people have been callin' it a ATL."
~~~
Several ATLs later a loud, shrill sound cut through the air, momentarily drowning out even the music.
"Oh, schidt," Max and Kyle slurred in unison.
Ava looked up quickly, "Did someone just step on a cat?!"
"That's no cat, that's --"
"Maxie!" screeched Tess, pushing several people out of the way in order to get to her goal. "I am furious at you. You lied to me and left me home alone on a Friday night. If I hadn't been eavesdropping on some kids in the QuickieMart I'd never have known about this rave. And when I get here I find you! I am not speaking to you!"
She stomped over to Kyle and looked up at him in what she probably believed was a provocative manner.
"Hi, Ky-le," she said in what would have been a sing-songy voice if it had come from anyone else. "You look nice tonight. Are you having a good time?"
"Um, Tess, I blew you off, too. You should be pissed off at me."
"Oh, Ky-le, you're so cuuute!"
As Kyle was fending off Tess, Liz, Maria, and Isabel appeared at the bar. They caught up on what Ava had been doing with herself as she prepared three of her tasty tequila treats. In an attempt to be polite to her Dupe, Ava turn to Tess.
"Yo, Tess! Wan' a ATL?"
Tess turned and glared at the better looking version of herself. "Oh, are *you* still here? No, I do not want one of those dumb drinks. Alcohol will kill you, ya know! Oh, so as I was saying, Kyle..."
Prior to this exchange, the three girls had not noticed Tess' presence. Their new knowledge did not please them.
"What the hell is *she* doing here?" cried Maria. "I *so* cannot deal with her tonight!" At that, she downed her entire drink in one gulp, thought for a second, then downed Liz's drink also. "Come on, Michael," she said pulling Michael by the arm, "let's go dance."
"I *don't* dance," he replied.
"I'll dance with you, Maria," Kyle said quickly, eager to get away from Tess. He took Maria by the hand and led her to the opposite side of the room, as far as possible from the blond bimbo from hell.
Undaunted, Tess moved closer to Max, batting her heavily mascaraed eyelashes. Liz, seeing her intention, performed a preemptive strike and led a relieved Max onto the dance floor. Tess stamped her foot, then looked around to see who else she could hit on.
"Hey, Al," she began.
By the time the words were out of her mouth, Isabel had practically transported herself and Alex to the middle of the dance floor. Tess stamped her foot again. Now she was really pissed and wanted to make someone pay.
"Hey, Michael, look at the way Maria and Kyle are dancing."
Michael looked up from his drink and scanned the crowded room to find his girlfriend. Maria and Kyle were dancing so close that it looked like they were having sex vertically and with their clothes on. Michael picked up a nearby chair and flung it across the room at Kyle. Someone else's head got in the way, however. The owner of that head was very large and very angry. He picked up the chair and flung it back at Michael. Michael used his powers to block it and it hit someone else. Eventually, the chair flinging turned into an all out brawl.
Maria and Kyle remained oblivious to the fight until the DJ was hit and the music stopped. Looking up, they were surprised to see that the party had descended into chaos. Trying to get away from the fighting, the two backed up and Kyle accidentally stepped on a rather large man's foot. The man grabbed Kyle and prepared to hit him.
"I know kung fu and karate" Kyle shouted at him.
"And 47other dangerous words," Maria yelled, stamping on the man's foot again and causing him enough pain that he let go of Kyle.
"Come on, Kyle," Maria said. "It's too crazy in here. Let's go outside and have sex in my car."
~~~
Back by the bar, Tess was freaking out.
"Ohhh," she whined, "my new shoes! People keep stepping on my new shoes! Owie! Someone just hit me! Oh! My hair! They messed up my hair! Ava! Do something!"
Ava calmly set a large metal shaker on bar. She pulled out a bottle of Cuervo Gold, poured a generous helping, then added sugar, tabasco, ice and several other ingredients. Whistling quietly to herself, she shook the metal container.
"What are you doing?!" screeched Tess. "I told you to *do* something! What good are you? I can't believe you have my face. You don't deserve it. Now do something to stop this."
Ava placed the drink in front of Tess. "Drink this, Tess," she said calmly. "It will make everyone stop fighting."
"What are you talking about? Me drinking that stupid ATL thingy isn't --"
"There is a secret ingredient in it. When you, and only you, drink this secret ingredient, it will make the fighting stop. It will make Max very happy indeed."
Tess liked the sound of that. She picked up the drink and swallowed it quickly. The fast-acting poison in it killed her instantly and she fell to the floor. The fighting stopped almost immediately. People gazed upon Tess' dead body and smiled. Max, who truly *was* happy, lifted Ava onto his shoulders and the crowd applauded. A choir of angels appear and sang Halelulia. Peace was declared in the Middle East. The hole in the ozone repaired itself. Bill Gates declared bankruptcy.
All was right in the world.
THE END