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MY GUESTBOOK
While watching the man that had been my best friend for almost thirty years screaming at his assistant for doing what had been asked of him I realized just how close to the edge Josh had been driven by, well, everything.  I hadn�t seen him this close to a total meltdown since the Christmas he put his hand through a window; though I�m sure that he was pretty close to this when he found out about what happened to Donna in Gaza�I wasn�t around to see what happened but I do know that no one messes with Donnatella Moss without incurring the wrath of Joshua Lyman and that, without Donna around to keep him sane, Josh is the very definition of a loose cannon.  I had missed the signs that Christmas six years ago, too wrapped up in my own dramas and denial, but I wasn�t going to let him down again.

�I got it,� I said, taking the Blackberry from a terrified and confused kid from earlier whose name I was pretty sure was Otto before going into Josh�s office.

�Otto gave you that?  What are you scared to face me you little�� Josh said angrily.

�Josh,� I said, cutting him off and finding myself acting as the voice of reason, once again.

Josh was jumping he was so hopped up on a dangerous combination of caffeine, exhaustion, and stress.  If I accomplished nothing else on this trip to DC I was going to make sure that Josh visited his cardiologist.  Or make sure that Donna started getting after him again.  The latter would probably be much easier for everyone.  �I need that.�

�In a minute,� I said, slamming down a file on the TV before closing the door.  The last thing Josh needed was his staff listening to what I was about to say to him.  �I didn�t come here because you�re such a silver-tongued recruiter or �cause I got tired of summer in January.  Santos may be the future of this country once.  For all the partisan noises made on the margin we�re a country of centrists and he may just be the right man with the right message at the right time and if he is� I want to be a part of it.  But he can�t do it without you.  Liberal Democrats are going to try to force him left, Moderate Republicans are going to fence-sit as long as they can; you�re the one that�s got to make this go.  Who�s gotta to cut through the reflexive demagoguery and timidity and make people do what they were sent here to do.  Actually govern.  Serve the voters interests� instead of striking poses and playing �gotcha�.  It�s going to be next to impossible if you are at your best and, what may only be news to you, you are nowhere near your best.  Take the vacation.  I haven�t said I�m signing on but I can tell you this: I won�t stay unless you go.  One of us is getting on a plane tonight.  If it�s you, you�re back in a week.  If it�s me, I�m gone, adios, for good.�

I put the blackberry down on top of Josh�s plexi-glass cube that housed a baseball autographed by the entire current line-up of the Mets.  �Your call,� I said before walking out of Josh�s office and closing the door, leaving Josh to think about what I had said.

�Is he okay?� the woman who had earlier introduced herself as Ronna asked.

�Honestly I don�t know,� I admitted.

�Is this� Donna, um� Donna Moss� she told me to look for signs of something� she didn�t say why� I�ve heard rumours, but you never know about how much is truth, if there�s any truth at all, in gossip like this,� Ronna said.
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