i think i'll choose the latter, and show you a copy of a story i wrote about my father, recently.
Hanson. Taylor, in particular. Always the pretty one. always then one chased after.
i feel like he died. theres no coming back. itz all over. Hanson, Taylor, Everything... itz all done.
no more.
but that ridiculous. Taylor didn't DIE, he got MARRIED.
but do you realize that for any story written from now on, he will most likely be cheating or leaving his wife?
and who wants a Taylor like that? does that mean all stories end?
Of course not. Natalie's story just began.
it still feels like the world hasn't quite stopped shaking, and, i know eventually it will.
But i can't help but wonder. Will she always love him? will she love him like he needs? will he suffocate her?
Will it last?
I'm really happy for them. I'll miss my cousin shelby like crazy, and i just might quite possibly see them in two weeks, but thats another story. would you like to hear it?
ok.
Two weeks ago, i recieved a plane ticket from my father. I'm spending 7 full days with him. I haven't seen him in 5 full years.
I'm fucking terrified.
I dont know how to act around him, or if i so the things to him, i do to my mom (call her names, joking of course, or just a real fight in general), how will he react? I dont know. and for some reason (which is beyond me) I feel like if we got in a real big fight he might hit me. ( I dont know him well enough to actually KNOW that he WOULDNT) though... if i think about it.... i'm more likely to hit him.
and theres another thing! What if none of my feelings get resolved during that week? what if my bitterness and hatred just continue on with no outlet? even worse, what if i actually find even more reasons why i should sue him for abandonment, and disown him?
those anwsers and more, in two weeks!
anyway, i was watching The Road From Ablertane the other day, and all of a sudden, i got inspiried to write a hanson story. And i remembered what it was like to actually want to, and that feeling of.... (for lack of a better word) insperation just rushed over me, then i felt like i just Had to write this incredible story about when they were 12, 15, 17. then i remember that their quite a bit older than that, and couldn't of anything from this new era to write about, and became discouraged. I think those videos have some kind of subliminal message in them, and thats why we all wrote stories. itz why no one wants to now. they dont watch the videos.
I got The Fillmore, the other day. I was incredibly dissapointed, that they didn't put some kind of neat footage at thene nd, but hten wen i watched for the second time, i fell neatly inlove with the idea, that some much of that reminded me of the Portland concert that i went to.
This is extra long, because i haven't updated this in an extra long time. thanks for readin!