3/29/03
A NEW PATH
I'm all alone in the world
No one around for miles
But would it even matter if they were?
I don't show anything
No one knows who I really am
No one knows the heights of my joy
The depths of my pain
No one knows how many times it's been
When I wished it was all over
Wished it had never been
How many tears have made the journey,
Outward through my soul?
Leaving trails down my cheek
For others to follow.
I wish I could be strong
Could rise above this world, so cold to me
But I'm weak
Must succumb to the deep, rocking sobs
That leave me no peace
Oh god! how I want to let someone in
To have someone to share this with
Anyone to help me endure it all
But I've pushed them away
Into a deep chasm around my heart
No one can pass, though they try
I know they love me, but I can't open my heart
The screaming of my soul testifies to the hurt of its confinement
I don't even have a god to look to anymore
I've chosen another path, away from all the love I've ever known
A path of loneliness, fear
A path that will one day lead to my destruction
One day? alas, it is now
No more shall i try to endure these hardships
No more shall I fail
No more shall those tears journey through my eyes
They are trapped in my soul forever
Trapped in death
And delight
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