Favorite Quotes

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Now these my friends are quotes that I have picked up all over the place.  They come from my friends.  They come from my professors.  They come from my text books.  They come from all the other places which I have been exposed to in my life so far.  I hope you enjoy.

-"The secrecy of my job prevents me from knowing what I am doing" (T-shirt)

-"I can suck the fat out of your butt, but not out of your refrigerator" (TV)

-"How come sheep don't shrink when it rains" (wisdom from COB 300A)

-"If a telephone physic was really good wouldn't they know to call you" (more wisdom from COB 300A)

-"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the
workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." (unknown)

-If you give a man a fish, that man knows where to come for fish, teach a man to fish and you destroy your market base (ch 69)

-"A naked man fears no pickpocket.&quuot; (unknown)

-"sexual harassment, I don't know whaat that is, but it sounds fun" (Qleap)

-"I'm all for women wrestling, but noot in pudding, that's just demeaning to the humans who make pudding." (King of the Hill)

"Women, you can't trust them, they just they don't understand the double standard" (Qleap)

-"Don't you have a vibrator" (Geeneral Religion 101)

-"Here, for example, one finds a duly elected representative referring to another duly elected representative as "a pimp for the Eastern establishment environmentalists." One of the biggest problems with such a charge is that it's unlikely to beget much in the way of reasoned response. It's far easier to respond in kind than it is to persuade people rationally that one is not a jackass of that particular sort." (GWrit 103, 429).

-"Guys don't understand that if you kiss them when you are drunk it doesn't mean you would kiss them when you're sober" (Lindsay)

-"I'll never forget the speech you gave my high school graduation, I just drank two bottles of tequila, my wife doesn't know I'm here, any of you girls over eighteen"  (Alice Tompkins)

-"Maybe the past is like an anchor holding us back maybe you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be" (Sex and The City)

-"Dreams are meant for those who sleep. I prefer the life of day." (My alteration)

-"I've got these three girls in my group and once they get going it's hard for me to interject with my rational male thinking." (Ross)

-"You are fired, you minute hording clock watcher" (Donald Trump)

-"Perhaps in destiny's grand design there are no random meetings, and all is meant to be" (unknown)

-"...and I could see the squirrels...and, and they were married..." (unknown)

-"One page. Please for the love of God nothing more than that" (Gsci115E)

-"If you were my homework I would be doing you right now" (unknown)

-"Seduce my mind and you can have my body, find my soul and I'm yours forever." (unknown)

-"From one dream to another, so anothher day begins" (Love Hina)

-"Wherever I found religion in my liffe I found strife, the attempt of one individual or group to rule another in the name of God. The naked will to power seemed always to walk in the wake of a hymn" (Black Boy 136)

-"To know one's self is wisdom, but tto know one's neighbor is genius" (Minna Antrim)

-"In short there is good reason for yyou to drink Beast" (ECON 201)

-Moved out of the house so you moved next door
I locked you out you cut a hole in the wall
I found you sleeping next to me I thought I was alone
You're driving me crazy when are you coming home
-unknown

- “In our world, Every storm has an end. EEvery night brings a new morning. What’s important is to trust those you love, and never give up...We must Keep all hope alive...” (Nun at the alter in 600 AD in Crono Trigger).

-"(Paul) If I had two tongues I wouldd be the happiest person alive. (Jamie) No the second happiest" (Mad About You)

-"I am 'in a fiduciary position'-whicch is always a d____ uncomfortable position" (B-law 499, first time I saw censorship in a text book).

-"I just poured a glass of water to tthe mid-way mark. Looking at it, I start to wonder if it's half empty or full. Upon further investigation, I realize that the only damn reason I poured it is because Thomas stopped drinking soda so he'd get all sexy. That prompts me to dump said philosophical water and grab a Coke. Nya ha ha, enjoy THAT tidbit of mental goodness, and I'll see you all soon" (Stephen).

-"Customers who are injured and angryy tend to sue you, and juries tend to award them money" (B-law class).

-"I walked among Shadows, and found aa race of furry creatures, dark and clawed and fanged, reasonably manlike, and about as intelligent as a freshman in the high school of your choice---sorry, kids, but what I mean is they were loyal, devoted, honest, and too easily screwed by bastards like me and my brother" (Roger Zelazny 106).

-"Theoretically, causation in fact iss limitless. One could claim, for example, that 'but for' the creation of the world, a particular injury would not have occurred" (B law 258).

-"You got a beautiful wife, you love her, does she love you, do you have more than three pairs of pants" (all I need in
life).

-"when they pull the plug, do you nodd to an official plug puller, and what do you tip on something like that"
(Mad About you).

-"To answer your question. Yes, if yoou shoot an arrow into the air and it falls to earth you should know not where, you
could be liable for any damage it may cause" (B-law text 253).

-"Reputation, reputation, reputation!! Oh, I have lost my reputation! I have lost the immortal part of myself, and what
remains is bestial" (William Shakespeare).

-"Truth is generally the best vindicaation against slander" (Abraham Lincoln).

-"There's no limit to how complicatedd things can get, on account of one thing always leading to another" (E.B. White)

-"when I count my blessing I count yoou twice"

-"please do not breath while I smoke&"

-"The sources of the contrast betweenn the rent-controlled housing market and the largely unregulated food markets in New York City can be seen more vividly by trying to imagine what would happen if concern for the poor led the city's leaders to implement price controls on pizza. . . Pizza will be made from poorer-quality ingredients. Rumors will begin to circulate about sources of black-market pizza." (ECON 71)

-"Would you have any problem sending this person to jail? Yes I would, they should hang" (B law class)

-"It is the duty of governments, and of individuals, to form the truest opinions they can; to form them carefully, and never impose them upon others unless they are quite sure of being right" (John Stuart Mill)

-"A man doesn't automatically get my respect. He has to get down in the dirt and beg for it." (Jack Handy)

-"Why seven dwarves, exactly? Wouldn''t six be cheaper? Wouldn't 1,000 be bigger box office? Can't we get a computer analysis of dwarf configurations?" (GWrit 714)

-"For that matter, why should the expperience of being born be traumatic? Isn't it pretty nice to be let out of cramped quarters and see daylight and beaming parental faces" (GPHY text 392)?

-looking back on the movie many years lateer "how did we do that" "why don't we do that any more" :crash: "that's why" "oh so that's what happened to that lamp" "who's foot was that" "that was your foot" "no, that would be your foot" "oh we are getting to the end" "how do you know" "you have that look on your face" "what look, I don't have a look" "I will prove it to you" "oh you think I'm scared of you" "lets go"

-"The availability of coke as a fuel made Chattanooga, Tennessee, and Birmingham, Alabama, major centers for foundries"  (GHist text 488).

-"There is nothing more useless than a house broken male" (Asuka Langley Soryu)

-"you are looking for the fear in Albbert's eyes" (GPHYCH)

-You rarely hear someone say, "Oh, thhank you for explaining to me why my lifelong philosophy of child raising (or politics, or investing) is wrong. I'm so grateful for the facts!" The person usually says, "Oh buzz off, and take your cockamamie ideas with you" (199 GPHYCH text book).


-Have you ever wondered what it's like to be an orc in the Lord of the Rings? I mean, one of those nameless faces in the army that charged Helm's Deep? I mean, really... some of those poor orcs may have had names, jobs, wives, children... And all this talk of them being evil? Hell, they were just following orders. What makes a murderous orc any worse than an elf that jams arrows into people's eyes, huh? When you think about it. some of these orcs probably didn't want to fight. They were forced to strap on some armor, pick up a rusty sword, and told to rush headlong into a wall laden with a few hundred archers. The orcs may have seemed an overwhelming force, but when you're just one face in the crowd, all you see if your own death coming. ...Fucking draft... (Adam)

-May the snows of the mountain rain down uupon the paved roads and sidewalks of Harrisonburg with a vengeance such that the GMUS exam may be delayed till next week. -Thomas's thought of the day 2/24/03

-A candidate could refer to his or her oppponent as a "sick, pathetic, incompetent, liberal traitor whose self-serving
permissive attitude promotes a un-unionized bureaucracy and an anti-flag, anti-family, anti-child, anti-jobs ideology"
(GCOM text book pg 101)

-Oh sweet zombie jesus on a pogo-stick we''re screwed (8-bit theater)

-"No, there's no need to touch anythiing above the G-string." Dave Juliano, 6/9/02