| E-MAILS LINKS To E-mail you can click on an E-mail picture and this will open up your E-mailing program and put in the E-mail address and the subject also. It helps us if the address and subject is unchanged. E-MAIL ADDRESSES Maybe if you don't click on a link you need our E-mail addresses... [email protected] is our main one for both of us [email protected] is for an alternative [email protected] is for Shells [email protected] is for Mons [email protected] is for messy subjects [email protected] is for shiny subjects [email protected] is for others OTHER E-MAIL ADDRESSES Maybe you have a different E-mail address for us, this is OK, please use what you have. We give to some people different addresses. IF YOU HAVE NO REPLY We are very thankful for everyone who mails to us but sometimes it is too many and we cannot answer all E-mails. We try hard but not always do we succeed. If we are away we can find many thousands of E-mails when we get back and this takes a long time even if we are only to read them. Please do not be upset if we don't reply back. URGENT E-MAILS Sometimes you have something urgent for us so we have an address for this which is [email protected] but please use only if it is very urgent. We delete if it is misused. Perhaps you are unsure what is urgent so mail to [email protected] with the word urgent within the subject title. IF YOUR E-MAIL ADDRESS IS BLOCKED This can happen if your E-mail has swearing words or offensive words. If it is a real mistake we will unblock you but we need to know you are blocked. Do this by sending E-mail to [email protected] with the subject title of 'My E-mail address has been blocked'. If it is blocked for reason it will stay blocked. CONTACT US ON ICQ We have ICQ and our number is 16468069 and our page is http://web.icq.com/wwp?Uin=16468069. When it is flashing as online in the ICQ panel on the 'Contact Us' page we are online and you can use the buttons on the panel to contact us. Sometimes it is too busy and we have many chats going at once and there are too many people for us to talk to. We are OK for up to about 6 chats at the same time but get confused with more and send the wrong messages to people. We are confused easily - if we chat and send messages that don't make sense we have sent it by error so ignore. CONTACT US ON YAHOO INSTANT MESSAGE We use also this service where our registration name is Monika_and_Shells so you can contact us this way. As it is with ICQ we can someteimes have too many chats going. When I am writing this we have not put any descriptions on the Instant Message but have on the ICQ. CONTACT US ON MSN MESSENGER This too is another message system but not one we use much. Maybe this is the only one you have and want to chat, please E-mail to us and we provide contact informations. OUR CHAT ROOMS We have three but one is lost - maybe when you are browsing you find it, please tell us where it is and we will recover it. One is crap so we don't use it and one is new and we don't know how to use it. This is not very good. On the 'Contact Us' page is the panel for the ICQ chat room - click on the buttons. We will be on ICQ or chatroom but not both so look at the status signs. Our number for the chatroom is 269444947 and the name here is &Monika and Shells (it has the and mark at the front). POSTAL ADDRESS We do not reveal this. Very occasional times there are things to send and for this we use a Post Office address in the United States which then comes to us by Poste Restaunte in the UK so this takes a lot of time. PHONE NUMBERS Also we do not reveal these either for home, work or for mobile. Sorry. CHILDREN We talk to anyone of any age but there are certain things we don't talk of to children under18. IMPORTANT NOTE We try to be nice to people so when you are contacting us you are also to be nice to people. If you are nasty to other people, are swearing or offensive we are not interested. THANKYOU Thnakyou for reading this far, we hope it is easier to contact now.and that you understand our reasons for the above notes. |
| PLEASE READ HERE FOR CONTACTING US We make it easy to contact and have E-mails, ICQ, Yahoo Instant Message, MSN Messenger and Chat Rooms. Below are notes for when you want to contact, it may help explain. DO NOT COMMUNICATE ANYTHING OFFENSIVE OR PORNOGRAPHIC (we have this before, these people no longer have an internet connection) THIS IS IMPORTANT FOR SENDING E-MAILS All E-mails divert to different address and are sorted, filtered and scanned automatically. Some of our addresses only take 35Mb before thay are full, you'll get a message if this happen. If the e-mail is more than about 100kb please ask first and we'll give you a different address to use. Because our e-mails are filtered, any that contain swear words or offensive references are automatically deleted and we won't know they were sent. Ask us first if you want to send anything like this and we can give you a code to include in the subject heading which will bypass the system. Addresses that have 'autoreply' in them (e.g. [email protected]) generate an auto reply back to you. Don't write to us at these addresses as the e-mails are deleted when received. |
| THE AVERAGE CHAT SERVICE USER From the people on our contact lists we can deduce the following about the average chat user... Most are male (82%), 9% are female, 1% are male/female couples. About 4% are bisexual females and the remaining 4% is divided between bi-sexual males, lesbians and gays. The average user is therefore predominantly male but will display some female tendencies - maybe having small breasts. However, the male apendage is unaffected and if the claims are to be believed the average user has a 25cm penis - almost double the true average. We weren't asked about the size of our penises when joining and were unaware that a large penis was mandatory. Please don't tell ICQ that we don't have one or we might get banned. The average age is a little over 29, the most common ages (in order) are 32, 23, 27, 28 and 24. The youngest is 13 the oldest is 78. We have more people on our contact lists from the UK than anywhere else (to be expected) followed by Italy, Turkey, Egypt, China, the US, Germany and Australia. The average distance from us being just over 3000km. The nearest is just down the road and the furthest is nearly 20,000km (just about the furthest possible). The most common username is Eagle, the most common real name is Paul (and variations of). The average user is therefore... ...of Middle Eastern appearance ...lives in Tabriz in Northern Iran ...is called Paul Eagle ...was born in April 1974 ...has a 25cm penis ...has small breasts ...is a man with female tendencies ...drives a sports car ...has several girlfriends at once ...earns $80,000 a year ...is the worlds greatest lover ...spends 6 months a year travelling the planet ...and maybe has a tendency to slightly exaggerate. If this is you then congratulations on being the most average person on the planet. |
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