All About Me

Hello all. I have decided to write a little more about my pregnancy, and a little bit about what it is like being a young mom. It has been tough, and stressful, but very rewarding.

Before I got pregnant I was not a very "good" person. I was only 14 before I got pregnant, so there really wasn't to much I could do. But I did what I could. I skipped school and partied. Life was a joke. I didn't think anything could happen to me. I would skip school, go in the woods with my "friends" and smoke Pot. I really had no ambition towards school, I wanted to be with my friends. We would run from the cops when they came to bust us, and most of the time they would catch us and take us back to school. Then we would just skip again. It was an ongoing cycle that was getting me nowhere. I was failing all my classe and I just didn't care.

Then I got pregnant. It was over Christmas break my freshman year of highschool. I was at my boyfriend's house with my friend and some of his friends. I was not supposed to be there, I was supposed to be at a girl's house. But I lied. Still thinking nothing could happen to me.

Shortly after that night I missed my period. I told my mom and she made me a Dr appointment to get tested. And it was positive. I was so scared, but I knew I could not get an abortion. I knew that was not for me. So I did what I felt I had to do. I had my baby and I kept her.

When I was pregnant I lost all my friends. No 14-15 year old wanted to hang out with a pregnant girl. When I told the guy, he too left me. All my friends were still friends with him, but not me. Some friends, huh? It hurt alot to be 15 and not to have any friends. However, it was best because I needed to take care of myself now, and none of them did. I quit smoking and everything the DAY I found I was pregnant. I started reading about pregnancy and what to expect. I read about what was safe and what was not. I went to the Dr, and I took care of myself. Because of my age and size- I was 17 lbs underweight when I got pregnant- my OBGYN put me on a strict diet, which I followed. Also while I was pregnant I read up on Teen Pregnancy Statistics and decided to beat them. I completely changed my veiw on life. I realized that I was not invinsible and that things could happen to me and I thought I was pretty darn lucky that I was pregnant and not something worse. I decided I was going to be the best parent I could be.

While I was doing all this my "friends" were getting into worse drugs. Right now I say I would NEVER touch these drugs, but who is to say I wouldn't have if I was not pregnant. I looked at Kacie as my little savior. Everything happens for a reason.

I had Kacie the begining of my sophmore year of highschool. I went back to school in August 8 months pregnant. I didn't go for very long before my midwife told me to stop going. My feet and ankles were very swollen and she said I was retaing too much water, so she wanted me off my feet and out of the heat. So I got on home bound- which is when a teacher comes to your house and teaches you. That was fine until I had Kacie. After I had Kacie I missed a couple of weeks of the home bound and I got behind. I was on home bound for 6 weeks after having Kacie and when I went back to school I was so far behind. Being far behind and no longer pregnant I started skipping school again. Which was very bad. I would skip though because, #1, I felt it was pointless to go since I was so far behing, and #2, I wanted to see my friends, and being a new mom that was the only way I could. However, when I did it I would feel so guilty. I didn't do it very often. I failed my sophmore year.

My junior year I went to an Alternative Highschool. That was the greatest thing I ever did! At my Alternative High school I got excellent grades! The teachers there were so great! They were so nice and they really cared. Not like the teachers from my base school. I guess they had given up. I finished my sophmore and Junior year the same school year. I was able to do this because the school had a block schedule, which meant that after half a year you were done one class, the classes were just 2 hrs long each insetad of 1 hour. Which was fine with me because this way you could take more classes and not have too much work! So- I took sophmore and Junior English in one year, I did math on a computer and those were the classes  I had failed, the rest were all junior classes. That year was tough. I felt overwhelmed. But I did it! My senior year I made staight A's for the first time in my life! .......... (more on next page)