sometimes we lose sight of the things that matter.
this time last year. it's all so clear. and then... isaiah 40:26-31
26 Lift your eyes and look to the heavens:
Who created all these?
He who brings out the starry host one by one,
and calls them each by name.
Because of his great power and mighty strength,
not one of them is missing.
27 Why do you say, O Jacob,
and complain, O Israel,
"My way is hidden from the LORD;
my cause is disregarded by my God"?
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
so much has changed since. so much.
now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
*hebrews 11:1
it's been a pretty long time since i've come here to update anything of worth. i don't even have any photos to make the post vaguely interesting.
i owe some stuff abotu kyck, which was awesome. =) loved spending time with people for a weekend, getting to know them and stuff. yeah, just a really great weekend, as it is all the time. =)
back at school and i guess that i'm supposed to start freaking out a little, but i haven't. and it scares me. yes, i'm one of those people who freaks out about not freaking out, and it's all relatively pointless freaking out in the end...
all these scholarships and cadetships and everything is just getting to my head and it's all relatively scary. i am so not ready to think about the future and the rest of my life and all that. i mean, i know that it's not the be all and end all of everything, but it's still... yeah.
it feels so strange, i guess that's change
it's alright
the possibilities keep walking in on me
*possibilities teddy geiger
new layout in tribute to the lovely FNL. =)
and posting up photo link for yesterday. which was a lovely day. =)
easter show baby
and doing the quest again... up to along the way- seven places.
it's going to be a long time. =)
so last night went to pya's to make and eat pizza. twas very yummy, but the pic spam didn't prove quite as fruitful as last time. i think i'm losing it. lol. but here's the end result:
mine and mel's vs. jessie's and pya's
twas all very yummy and very full making... and then we took leftovers home. and i was looking forward to eating it when i came home today from school... but nooo... dad decided to eat my ugly pizza... but he said it was very nice. =) lol. generous amounts of ham (jessie loved it! *shifty eyes*), salami (i knew we didn't need that many slices! oh well, it was yummy anyway. lol), pineapple (so juicy!!!), mushrooms (yuuuuuuuuuuuum *insert cookie monster sound when he eats cookies*), spinach (something about mel being popeye?!? lol) and garlic (mmm... garlic... ^^)
but yeah, just a nice night to hang out. =) lovely. thanks to mum and dad for putting up with us. =)
and then it was back to school today... nothing new i suppose. but nice.
maybe tonight
it's gonna be alright
i will get better
maybe today
it's gonna be okay
i will remember
*i'm still here vertical horizon
with essences of first love (piano) thrown in... nobuo uematsu?
apprehension.
just a little bit. not sure why. but i think because people will be there. and sometimes that's scary.
but this is what i want to do. this is where i want to be. i wouldn't have it any other way.
i thought about doing 10 things. but i don't think i really need that many. and they're all in my head anyway. and besides, no one comes here to read anymore anyway. lol. this is just the dead hole that i've resorted to. but nevermind. i still like it. it's simple. =) and yum. ^^
it's hard to figure this thing through. because i don't want to let her down. i don't. but it just feels a little bit unreasonable. and i can't make her understand. or maybe i'm in deeper that i ever thought that i would be, and i'm being blinded by the water surrounding me, and when i start drowning, there isn't going to be anyone there to help me out.
or maybe i'm just naturally pessimistic.
i've been looking back at past blog posts recently and realising that i write way to cryptic for my own good. there are lots of things that i can't remember writing and have no recollection of what they're about. i'm getting back into the random dribble blog, rather than the update blog. lj is a bit more update like than anything. here... it's just nice to ramble a bit. i think that's what spaces was for a while. and now that's dead, what do i have left for me? blogger is dead, the new blogger not so great either, limited audience and limited updates, and then... then you have here, where no one reads anyway. yet i continue to type like it's my life story and i actually have an audience...
i think i'm losing the aspect of me blogging because of everyone else. and really, not it's about me. but then i think sometimes, stupidly, there's an aspect of me that wished i could blog like you, or you, or even you. or i could do the things that you did to make it interesting, pretty, to have people read. but i guess i don't really care much about the reading anymore, and it just is.
what's the rationale behind posting your thoughts and dreams and wishes and hopes and all the stupid little things on the world wide web to have everyone and anyone read it? i don't know. i plead insanity. *shrug* it just is i suppose.
i love it, it's me. what's more to say?
today shall be a good day. no matter what happens on that side of things.
today shall be a good day.
my heart's one desire
is to be holy
set apart for you lord
i choose to be
*refiner's fire
exams are all over. and now? now i weigh up the pros and cons of that conversation. *sigh*
had a good day today. went out. this is what i had to say at livejournal:
headed out to trish's at 11:30. of course, as soon as i left the house it started to rain, nevermind that t had an umbrella. lol. so was a bit wet, handed over oth season 2 and stole some betty crocker cookies, which were very yum. =)
so then we walked to cherrybrook shops, but figured that it was a bit early to eat lunch. so we walked around, and then decided to grab some crab claws. very tasty. =) and then we bummed in that little booth-like thing for a bit, talking and such. good to catch up, and a few things that i maybe didn't want to know, but nevermind. tis all good, and things will turn out. lol.
then there was that weird guy who was like, "i couldn't help but overhear..."
and we were like *dear in headlights look* because we hadn't been talking about the greatest of topics...
then he was like, "i'll make a challenge to you two girls. see if you can go through the whole day without saying 'like'."
and then we just cracked up.
but how odd. we didn't think we were saying it that much. but there you go. lol.
then decided that we'd had enough of creepy people listening in on our conversation... so headed to subway to get our buy one get one free thing that my mum had taken out of the sydney morning herald. lol. man, i love asian parents! =)
we both got sweet onion chicken teriyaki on italian herb and cheese, toasted, trish with lettuce, tomato and cucumber, and me with just lettuce and onion, and both with cheese of course.
and then we got a regular drink (coz that's part of getting the one free) and then we got a free cookie! lol.
sat, ate, talked some more.
nice soundtrack on the radio too: chasing cars by snow patrol, and over my head (cable car) by the fray... yum-ness. =) lol.
so yeah, finished up... then decided that we needed some more asian-ness.
so it was back to the sushi place to get some more crab claws, and more talking in the booth. it was nice. little things get us thinking too much... sorry for bringing it up and making you think... ><" *sigh*
anyway, then walked home and jpps was having some assembly thing, and it was just... a little bit reminiscent... *sigh*
but anyway, yeah, then came home, and did up photos. some old ones too.
29th march- photo recap
not much there i suppose...
but we haven't gone skiing yet!
*me
it has been a while since the last post. nothing much to say. letting go a bit. trying to get into that study thing.
need a day to break. just do nothing. bum. after exams will do. i like that friday idea. but i'm not here on friday. that sucks. can we do thursday then? sigh.
need some photos of something. i like posting photos.
layout change in the holidays i think. new obsession? haven't decided yet. we'll see.
this week will be good. =)
monday: early mornings, tlc opening
tuesday: lazy day
wednesday: bowling, sweet afternoons.
thursday: possible rehearsal?
friday: praise, wacd
saturday: nerd time.
sunday: church and possible lunch
it'll be good. =) and the conversation is always nice. and sometimes surprising.
but i think i'm letting go...
i dare you to move
like today never happened
today never happened before
*dare you to move switchfoot
smoothies $3. and because i'm oh-so-asian, i decided to drag along pya and my ditzness after our excursion to the bank.
choices? strawberry, wildberry, banana, mango. oh it was a toughie. but i was in a bit of a berry mood. so wildberry it was. meanwhile, trish ordered herself a apple and berry crumble with icecream. yum.
and then they came.
and look, i got the leftovers too! lol.
how the yum. =) so then pya ended up getting a banana one. and we bummed at fusion for a bit. the ever so cool fusion.
so now i've been. and i've decided that i like the place. and i want to own a caf�. anyone wanna join in my business venture? lol. how fun.
1434. it doesn't look as nice though. <3
i'll be the greatest fan of your life...
*i'll be edwin mccain
muck up day photos are done and done. =)
here. how fun. =) what a fun day ^^
nothing else. ta ta.
4th february 2007 10:22pmand so the girl is back.
i suppose a lot has happened since i've been away, while i've been away.
one__ i'm a year older, as of yesterday.
two__ i have a new... something. is it still nephew if it's my cousin's cousin's baby? nyeh. anyway, welcome to zac. =)
three__ been doing a lot of thinking. so changing a little bit mentally i suppose. or maybe going insane. or maybe that's not a change at all, coz i'm always thinking. that's nothing new.
four__ i'm officially a philosophy student of UNE. =) the pack came while i was away. and just looked through it. seems a bit scary. *shrug* i dunno. it's making me think about dropping 4unit english. not that i wasn't thinking about it already but... yeah. sigh. i dunno.
i think that's about it. nothing much. not many photos either. *shrug* will do them some time. but for now...
lindy jie jie with ethan di di.
celebratory icecream with abi and nat. anyone else think we look similar?
and one final stupid photo...
shut up. =) i was making new friends. ^^ lol.
soundtrack at the moment definitely has to be the finding neverland soundtrack which i purchased for a nice sum of ang bao money. =)
when the first baby laughed for the first time, the laugh broke into a thousand pieces, and they all went skipping about. and that was the beginning of fairies.
*peter pan from finding neverland
leaving tomorrow. excited muchly. =) as it comes closer i start to miss all the family more than ever. but it's like, once i'm there, we're still all uncomfortable-ish with each other. but can't wait to see my baby cousin, who's not going to be quite to baby anymore. and then my "nephew", not really coz it's my cousin's kid, but that's how we do it in our family. lol. but that should be cool. =)
looking forward to all the shopping and eating and everything. and just being away from here, and from people and whatever. too much thinking goes on, whereas, when we're over there, i'll be run off my feet doing stuff... but yeah...
i'm excited. =) come back on the 4th. later later. =)
why can't we get all the people together in the world that we really like and then just stay together? i guess that wouldn't work. someone would leave. someone always leaves. then we would have to say good-bye. i hate good-byes. i know what i need. i need more hellos.
*charles m. schultz
11th january 2007 5:51pm
net got disconnected before i could post up all the edits, as well as the additional pages to the site. but whatever.
now they're there. and i don't really have anything else constructive to say. lol.
10th january 2007 5:21pm
the new face of misselty. (i think i'm really starting to let the name grow on me.)
embracing the newly watched grey's anatomy and subsequent love for mer/der, despite the coolness of addison, who hasn't really come yet anyway.
don't get too caught up in the fact that i have a layout based on the show. it's just current boredom and discovery of icons.
i'm going to be sticking around here, layout change, or no layout change. but as i said on paintme_rainbows, i'm not sure about the updates. but i'm going to try. i think i just like my geocities bug too much to let it go.
trying to have a little bit less "i feel obliged to post" or "this is random, but i'm bored" kind of posts, but even as i say that now, i know that things will turn out differently. but let's just say that for now, shall we?
other links are as yet obsolete, but shall be done hopefully before i leave, jetsetting across to the "mother land".
in the mean time, i shall leave you with little, other than:
there's something romantic about just being in the world and the loss of every passing moment.
*barbara gowdy