The gnomes ignored Minion No. 3's angry shouts and scuttled over to the corner of the room, the large tree wobbling dangerously above their heads and shedding pine needles over the floor.
"Heave ho lads!" called Leprechaun, perched on the picture rail. "One, two, THREE!"
The enormous fir tree swung upright, swayed precariously on the spot for a moment then steadied.
"Well done boys!" shouted Leprechaun, jumping onto the top of the tree and sliding down the branches easily.
The gnomes beamed and scurried over to the boxes of dusty decorations that Crouton had managed to unearth from the depths of the Creator storeroom. Leprechaun inspected a half melted bauble and looked apprehensively at Crouton.
"Well I didn't do it," she protested, "The fire must have damaged some."
"We went through them this morning and threw out the defective ones," replied Leprechaun suspiciously.
"Maybe you missed one."
Leprechaun glanced at the twisted lump of cheap metal sceptically. "We don't miss things."
"But why would anyone want to melt a…" She trailed off slowly.
Melt?
For melting you needed fire.
Oh.
She tugged the warped bauble from Leprechaun's hands and examined it closely. Sure enough, it looked very much like someone had tried to purposely set fire to it.
"Flower? Have you seen Minion No. 6?"
"She's out collecting firewood," answered Flower, draping tinsel around the top of the tree. "Why?"
Crouton sighed and threw the half melted bauble into the bin. "No reason."
"Crouton? How d'you spell 'diminutive midgets'?" asked Minion No. 3, her pen hovering over a much scribbled on piece of paper.
"Er.." said Crouton as the gnomes glowered at Minion No. 3.
"Never mind. I've thought of something else that will fit," said Minion No. 3 happily, "'Cocky little-'"
A shrill whistle reverberated around the room and everyone's gaze was drawn once again to the three smartly dressed pixies hovering in the air.
"We have a letter from Lord Darcy," announced Sebastian, waving an important looking envelope.
"Throw it on the table, Noggin'll find it later," said Crouton, untangling a pile of fairy lights.
Sebastian looked appraisingly at her and set it carefully down on the table.
"Make sure you give it her," said Jude firmly, staring distrustfully at the Minions.
A loud explosion shook the tree, knocking the tiny gnomes over like bowling pins.
"What was that?" exclaimed Julian, grabbing Jude's arm in fright
"That would be Alan," grumbled Leprechaun, picking himself up from the floor and pulling sticky pine needles off his uniform.
"I thought he left," said Jude uneasily. Darcy wouldn't be pleased to hear that Noggin was playing host to another god.
"He did," said Crouton, dumping the fairy lights in front of Minion No. 7 who levitated them around the room, stringing them over the doors and along rafters. "But when the gods got back to Seventh Heaven they found they had squatters."
"Squatters?"
"Yes," grinned Minion No. 5, "Someone herded a flock of sheep in there and they can't get them out. According to the Law of the Forest, the sheep have every right to be there. The gods have appealed of course but they're staying here until they can get the sheep evicted."
"Only the Forest Spirits are very old fashioned and aren't likely to change their minds," said Crouton, sitting on a bean bag. "So Cretin's arranged for a few of her associates to see to it that the sheep are removed.. Erm, eventually. She's rather enjoying having Depp around."
Just at that moment, Cretin herself emerged from a stairway and scuttled furtively across the room heading for the outside door, watched interestedly by the assembled Minions, gnomes, pixies and solitary elf.
When the door had shut behind her Minion No. 7 asked slowly, "Why was she wearing sunglasses? It's nearly midnight."
"Yeah, and what was with the long black over coat and trilbie?" inquired Leprechaun, pausing in the act of hanging a bell onto the tree.
"All in all, why did she look like a movie style gangster?" said Jude, staring after Cretin in puzzlement.
The crowd shrugged in unison then Flower said bemusedly, "Because she's Cretin and that's what she does. She's being cretinous."
"Is that a word?"
"It is now."
Flower took a handful of fairy dust out of a leather pouch and threw it into the air. At once, the glittering fairy lights burst into life, lighting the room with a whole rainbow of colours.
Leprechaun scurried up the tree and secured the gently glowing star that Gremlin had created years ago at the very top before swinging down to the floor via a loose strand of tinsel.
"Well that's it everyone," he said grinning, "Only two weeks till Christmas.."
Flower sat alone in the meeting room, addressing the last of her Christmas presents. The fairy lights glimmered softly around her, their ever changing colours giving the room a warm glow. Suddenly, high above, Flower heard a faint rustling of leaves and the murmur of a whispered conversation.
She leapt easily off the branch of the Christmas tree she had been perched on and fluttered quietly into the rafters in search of the intruders. After a few minutes searching she spotted the two black capped pixies through a gap in the leaves.
"...Well what are we supposed to do? We can't very well-"
"We have to!"
The first pixie squirmed uneasily. "Why?"
"Because... We were told to."
"But-"
"What's going on?" asked Flower, pushing through the brown oak leaves to get closer to the pixies.
The two figures jumped at being disturbed and one nearly fell off the branch.
"Careful Sebastian!" warned the pixie nearest to Flower, hauling his companion to his feet,
Flower grinned and walked along the icy branch towards them. "What are you up to?"
The front pixies touched his cap and said guardedly, "We've been sent to deliver a message."
"Which is?"
The pixie glanced uncertainly at his colleague who shrugged unhelpfully.
"It's for Lady Darcy," he said eventually.
"Noggin's asleep. What time d'you call this anyway?"
The pixie glanced nervously at her and consulted his watch. "Erm... 9 o'clock in the morning?"
"Precisely! It's far too late to be delivering messages. They all went to sleep hours ago."
"Too late?"
"Yes. Don't you know anything about Minion? They sleep from dawn till dusk. Everyone knows that."
"We didn't," shrugged Sebastian, stifling a yawn.
"Tired?"
"Exhausted. It's a long way from Pemberley to here."
Flower grinned again, "I think that's what attracted Darcy to the place."
The pixies returned the grin with a smirk, "Probably. I'm Jude by the way and this is Sebastian."
"I'm Flower." She frowned for a moment in recollection. "Where's Julian?"
Jude and Sebastian exchanged mischievous looks.
"We, erm, may have *ahem* accidentally, left him behind."
"In a ditch."
"Bound and gagged."
"And unconscious."
Flower arched an eyebrow but grinned all the same. "Well if you go to sleep now you're welcome to give your message to Noggin this evening."
"This evening," said Sebastian, alarm evident in his voice. "But by then it will be too late!"
"For what?" inquired Flower, frowning.
The two pixies looked at each other again, then, apparently deciding that telling her could cause no more problems than it already had, Jude said carefully, "It is a matter of great importance to our Master, Lord Darcy."
"And it is?"
They told her. She grinned.
"In that case, there is no excuse for your not staying the day."
"But surely it would be better to wake the Creators?" said Jude uncertainly.
"And spoil the surprise?" laughed Flower. "No, trust me - it'll be far more amusing if they know nothing about it."
Sebastian grinned, "That's true but I wonder for whom it will be most amusing? Us or them?"
