FM

in his ass, eyes and all. His upperbody slouches three feet behind his lowerbody. He is the leader of the evil gang called "The Massholes," sworn enemies of "The Ultra Acquaintances." Anywho, he decided he didn't need a burden like Foom Man in the future, so he decided to dispose of him. First Smart Ass druged Foom Man's soda that week, so he'd lose most of his strength ability. He put some of his special ingredient, Ovaltine, into his Pepsi. Then he got into his disguise and waited for him.
    One day Foom Man was impressing his lady fans when Smart Ass arrived in outift. He said to Foom Man: "Well hello Foom Man, nice weather we're having, eh?" Foom Man, being the nice guy he was, responded "Fine."
    "Well," Smart Ass went on, "I see you are trying to impress Catherine over there? She is a fine piece of ass. If you want to get her in the sack, why not show off your superstrength by lifting up that pickup truck?"
    "WHAT?!" Foom Man replied, "I don't think like you, you vile sexist bastard! How dare you refer to Catherine like that!" With that Foom Man took off his backpack and walked over to the truck.
    "That's right Foom Man, you have the strength of five hundred men..." Foom Man then picked the truck up effortlessly. "BUT YOU ONLY HAVE THE STAMINA OF ONE FIFTH! HAHAHA!!!!!" With that Foom Man was crushed like a bug, and went into a one year coma.
    When he awoke, he had no reconsiliation of what had happened. He also suffered a large case of amnesia, forgeting his name, his powers, even the location of his porn stash. Because of the odd absense of his parents and large hatred from his peers at school, nobody told him what powers he had. Their jealousy meant he wouldn't attain the title of the next Superman.
    Foom Man kept his head high, as a cast held it for him for six months more in the hospital. He still wished to be a legendary superhero, so he tried to keep his image clean. One day he was drinking some nice, warm Nesquik when by accident a support for various monitors and IV's feel on him. His first spontanious reaction was to yell a loud cuss. He began "Fffffff-" but then saw a group of children outside of his room, looking in and laughing at him. He knew he couldn't swear infront of them, it would damage their little virgin ears. So, with that in mind, he continued to speak: "Fffffffffffffffooooooooooommm."
     BBBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMM!!!!!!!!
     From the hands of Foom Man came a two megaton   blast,   blasting   and smashing anything infront of them out of the way into oblivion... including the wee children. They were killed instantly, but Foom Man was happy anyways, he now knew a super power he had. Whenever he spoke the sacred word of Foom, he would emit a two megaton blast from his palms. There was no flame nor electricity, just a huge FOOOOM. The FOOOOM has the punch of four nuclear bombs, but emits little flame or anything otherwise. It is one of the strongest forcess of all time. It was perfect. He escaped from the hospital quickly, killing five totally innocent people along the way, but ignorant of his actions. Success was in his mind.
    But during his one year hospital visit, something had happened. Smartass yet again had arrived, in order to complete phase two of his plan: steal Foom Man's powers. He came in disguise and took a sample of Foom Man's blood while he was in his coma, then retreated back to his secret lair. There, he injected the blood, along with the correct chemicals, into his face (IE his ass). But the experiment went wrong. The ovaltine had remained with Foom Man! The ovaltine had foiled his plan! The chemical mixture failed due to it. One of Smartass's hemroids fell on the floor, and grew into Boom Dude! Boom Dude was just as ignorant as Foom Man, and thought Smartass as his enemy. When Smartass tried to befriend him (to eventually use him) he told him his name was "Boom Dude". With that, Boom Dude spoke "Boo-" and BBBBBBOOOOOOMM.
    He had the same powers as Foom Man due to his ignorance!! He then befriended Smartass, knowing he could assist him in killing Foom Man. He wanted to be original, not a copy! So he set out to kill Foom Man. Boom Dude is bent on destroying Foom Man, and will now stop at almost nothing to kill him. Bummer.
    Back to our hero. Foom Man was feeling great. His want to do good and morals stayed fresh and number one in his mind, though his common sense suffered a bit from the time lapse. He is slowly regaining his memories and intelligence, though it isn't coming near fast enough. Hopefully one day he will regain all of his abilities and memory, and be able to save mankind just as his forfathers did.

Read On About His Saga Here

Frank Fuman was to be a legend. The son of Superman and Wonderwoman, and the best student at Super Hero Academy as of freshman year. He could out perform everyone in their field at school, quickly leading some students into hating him. If "The Chunk" could benchpress thirty tons, he could bench sixty tons. While all of the females at the school adored him, some men hated him. He was thought of by all of the adult super heroes to be the next Superman, and then some. Things were looking good for old Foom Man.
It was then that our series's arch villan entered Foom Man's scene: Smart Ass. Smart Ass is a super intelligent man born with his brain