And here is the unequivocal evidence that Jill Killed The Easter Bunny!

This evidence consists of photographic records of the crime scene, the murder weapon, and the dangerous substances whose use may have contributed to the incident. First, we shall examine the Crime Scene. [WARNING these images may be upsetting to young children, small animals, and television marketing executives]

This picture was taken by Michigan state police investigators. "It was awful, just awful," said Lieutenant James P. Smith. "The eggs, the broken eggs and the basket...what am I going to tell my children?" The rabbit was apparently attempting to cross the road on his way to deliver candy and eggs when Jill rammed into him, killing the springtime symbol instantly. The loss to the children of Michigan and the world is, perhaps, too great to comprehend.

On to the Murder Weapon, a minivan of unknown make. "It was a head-on collision," says Lt. Smith. "The rabbit had no chance." A witty passerby, quoting the line from Harry and the Hendersons, commented that "there's probably guts and eyeballs hanging off the bumper."

Now, let's look at the Dangerous Substances. Officials surmise that, before the dastardly deed was committed, young Jill consumed an unknown amount of Hot n' Now Olive Burgers. Such are known hallucinogens, and have been linked to injuries and deaths of beloved childhood icons all over the Great Lakes area. According to Michigan state police medical consultant Dr. Meredith Klein, "these kids, they eat their Hot n' Now burgers, and then they go driving, sometimes never knowing how the consumption of the 'good food' has impaired their judgement and driving skills. It's a disaster waiting to happen. The Easter Bunny incident is only the most recent and visible...who knows how many innocent Santa Clauses and circus clowns have suffered because of this?"