Getting the inside story on health of your colon, about Dave Barry's trip to the Colossal Colon.
News Flash: John Allis is wearing a jacket made of synthetic materials!!! I love that hat.
This takes "disturbing" to a whole new level. Ulli's Roy Orbison In Clingfilm Website.
Sort of an invisible hand... To Commutte to Washington, the Early Bird Gets the 'Slugs,' from the New York Times. "This form of commuting -- solo drivers picking up strangers so they can all cruise to work legally in high-occupancy-vehicle lanes -- is called 'slugging.' "
Those fabulous Chinese chopstick wrappers, from OddTodd.com.
Ed and I just went to see Bend It Like Beckham. Awesome movie.
Keep the University of Hawaii logo. Said my former roommate Mike on the petition site: "This is rearranging deckchairs on the Titanic. Logos are about form over substance, anathema to an institution of learning and research. Our existing logo is collegiate and distinguished, while the new logos are slick and commercial."
Spoof French Newspaper Reports U.S./UK Invasion, from Reuters.
Ex-Iraq Info Minister Gets TV Job Offer, from Reuters.
Nude Man Rescued From Store's Air Duct, from AP.
An Equal Opportunity Athlete: School Without Walls Has Only Girls' Lacrosse, So What's a Boy to Do?, from the Washington Post.
Fighting Back in Santa Cruz: Medical Marijuana Patients Sue the Feds, from CounterPunch.
Boycott of French & German Products Faces Confusion, from O'Dwyer's PR Daily.
Iowa couple has bicycle-themed wedding, from Boston.com.
At Hula Festival, Men Who Dance Are Dwindling, from the New York Times.
Unused Audio Commentary by Howard Zinn and Noam Chomsky, Recorded Summer, 2002, for the Fellowship of the Ring (Platinum Series Extended Edition) DVD, Part One, from McSweeney's.
Cue the Tequila: If you thought reality TV had gone too far, wait until you see the first reality movie, from Time. Priceless quotes on page 2.
Rolling Back the 20th Century, from The Nation. "George Bush II may be as shallow as he appears, but his presidency represents a far more formidable challenge than either Reagan or Gingrich."
Town meeting segregated by sensitivity (to smell), from Boston.com.
300 reasons why we love The Simpsons, from The Guardian.
Prevention Programs And Scientific Nonsense, from Policy Review.
Pains me as a small-"l"-libertarian, but interesting article. Biting the budget bullet: Why raising taxes is the least painful way out of the state's fiscal crisis, from Boston.com, courtesy of Josh (big-"D"-Democrat).
More talent than most politicians... German government minister now a champion beer drinker, from Boston.com. Squeamish beware: uses the word "uvula."
Hear the One About the Mayor Who Wanted to Ban Lying?, from the New York Times. Courtesy of Cam.
Little girl helps save 17-year-old goldfish, from Boston.com.
Southwest fires pilots for undressing, from CNN Money. From Ed.
'A licence to kill? Oh heavens, no!' from the Daily Telegraph. "Daphne Park does not look like James Bond, but she was the true face of British Intelligence for 30 years." " 'It's been a huge advantage during my professional career that I've always looked like a cheerful, fat missionary,' she says, fondling her onyx pendant. 'It wouldn't be any use if you went around looking sinister, would it?' "
A Self-Described Slacker Who Really is No Slouch, from the New York Times. All about Odd Todd!
West prime candidate for Yale student's free state dream, from The Olympian.
Gallery of Regrettable Food. YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT THIS SITE.
Christopher Hitchens Forcibly Removed From Trailer Park After Drunken Confrontation With Common-Law Wife, from The Onion. "When the officers attempted to remove Hitchens from the premises, the leftist intellectual became physically and verbally abusive toward the officers, calling them 'shitkickers,' 'bitches,' and 'effete liberal apologists for the atrocities of late-stage capitalism.' "
For $2, a Bottle of Wine and Change, from the New York Times.
'Miracle' dog heralded by Calif. vets, from Boston.com.
Dude, Where's My Spice Grinder?, from the New York Times, on campus cuisine.
PETA Urges Hamburg, N.Y., to Change Name, from AP.
It's a Dog's Life -- Amazing Story of Survival, from Reuters.
The Despotic Power, from the Castle Coalition, about abuses of eminent domain.
Comment by unnamed friend: "They could've gotten better clothes than that. Where are the freakin' udders?"
Every Unhappy Family Has Its Own Bilinear Influence Function, from the Chronicle of Higher Education. "Researchers propose a mathematical model of marriage."
Sex and the single cook, from the Times Online. "Cooking can help bachelors find love, claims an Italian celebrity chef." No arguments here! Bicycle mechanic skills help too.
Area Man Supports The Troops He Didn't Go To High School With, from The Onion.
Saddam Proud He Still Killed More Iraqi Civilians Than U.S., from The Onion.
New Children's Book Helps Kids Deal With Pain And Isolation Of Plastic Surgery, from The Onion.
Courtesy of Heather: Won't the real Hussein please stand up? Please stand up?
Intestine replica educates Arkansas, from Boston.com.
I received this from a co-worker today. All I can say is that it's hyper-disturbing in and of itself, let alone the fact that some people think this is cute...
Ask the Doctor: Attack of the über-mommies, from VeloNews. Check out my teammate, Heather, in the photo!
Emergency Audit: We're spending $80 billion, but it's not all for war, from Reason
Bashing Bashar, from Ha'aretz. "America's verbal assault on Syria has its leader scrambling for reassurance that his country won't be next on the U.S. hit list."
Thanks for Nothing: Bush's gift to taxpayers -- and Halliburton, from Slate. " 'Dear American Taxpayer: We are pleased to inform you that in gratitude for all the billions you're going to be pouring into Iraq, the U.S. government has made a sweetheart deal on your behalf with a company you've never heard of.' Eighty billion dollars -- the size of just the first expense report the Bush administration has submitted to Congress -- works out to about $1,000 that needs to be kicked in by each household in the United States. Of course we're putting it all on the credit card, to be paid for in the future, with interest. But it's still real money. If we made a contribution that big to our local public broadcasting outlet, we'd qualify for a CD recording by six, nine, or even 12 tenors. From the Bush administration, we don't even get a tote bag."
Ed says: "Amusing *and* interesting." President, Saddam and Osama, Information Minister Talking Action Figures.
The electronic equivalent of bad sex, from the Times Online. "Eggheads have to grab their place in the news cycle while they can."
Unchained: Once a legitimate pursuit, the role of mistress has gone out of vogue, from the Toronto Star.
Whoa. This circulated through my office today -- I guess I work with a lot of older women who think men are stupid. =)
But Where's Amanda Hugginkiss?, from Reason. "Wow -- a reporter from the Charleston Post and Courier fell for the old 'Heywood Jablome' gag. Next week: a quote from the noted expert 'Seymour Butts.' "
"It's a former president, Tom. What do you say -- he's not delicious?" from Reason. "This month CNN accidentally posted some of its prewritten obituaries to the Web, letting us see how it plans to cover the deaths of Dick Cheney, Fidel Castro, and other notables. The Smoking Gun captured some screenshots before CNN discovered its error and took down the obits."
God Only Knows: Rogue deity must decide which side he is on, from Reason.
Does an Elite College Really Pay?, from msn.com, courtesy of Dad.
Marshmallow Peeps, from handmade sweet to technological advance and icon of kitsch, from Boston.com.
After Empire, from City Journal.
Between a high mind and a low life: Alasdair Palmer reviews Journalism: Truth or Dare? by Ian Hargreaves, from the Daily Telegraph.
Life's Lethal Quality Control, from the Times Higher Education Supplement, about "cancer selection."
Where are they now? Doug Smith's eating his Wheaties in Hawaii, from VeloNews. That Hawaii photo made me totally homesick...
Man of the World, from New York Metro. "Newsweek columnist Fareed Zakaria has the perfect intellectual pedigree (Indian-born, educated at Harvard, conservative) for a fast-changing world, and the kinds of friends in high places who can push a career into overdrive. The first Muslim secretary of State? Don't bet against it."
Palace of Saddam's Son Odai Includes Stores of Liquor and Heroin, and Photographs of Bush Twins, from AP.
Bounty Descendants Hunt A Future: Like their mutinous ancestors, the people of Pitcairn face hard times, from TIME Europe.
From republic to empire, from The Globe and Mail. "Lyndon Johnson and Richard Nixon were labelled 'imperial presidents,' recalls former White House adviser Roger Morris. But neither could hold a candle to today's George Bush."
Spotted yesterday on a large Chevy truck in Medford: a see-through flag decal covering the entire back window, stickers on the tailgate reading: "God Bless America! Made By, Paid For, and Driven By an American," and a bumper sticker that said, "First Iraq, Then France." Whoa.
Home Defense: How to Secure the Homeland Without Leaving the House, from Reason.
Inmate Caught with Cash in Dreadlocks, from Reuters.
Lawn mower racing the cutting edge of sport, from Reuters.
McCartney's "flu germs" for sale on Internet, from Reuters.
Get yours now! Iraqi 'Most-Wanted' Deck of Playing Cards.
Modern Drunkard Magazine features Soviet and American prohibitionist art.
Bush vetoes Syria war plan, from the Guardian.
Spam I Am: I try an Internet get-rich-quick scheme, from Slate.
Sleuthing Patriotic Slogans, from AlterNet.org.
Whoa. Landlord encourages timely rent with contests, from Boston.com.
In case you were wondering what the U.S. is bringing to Iraq. Democracy! Whiskey! Sexy!, the t-shirt. Duke's Men, this one's for you. Iraqi information minister merchandise also available. Soon all the cool kids will be wearing the Vive La France surrender monkey.
India Mulls 'Pre-Emptive' Pakistan Strike, Cites U.S. Iraq War Precedent, from Agence France-Presse. Says Josh: "This sounds like something from The Onion but sadly it's the expected result of Bush's unilateralist policy."
From the I Am Not Making This Up department: Army chaplain offers baptisms, baths, from The Miami Herald. " 'It's simple. They want water. I have it, as long as they agree to get baptized,' he said."
The Nerd-ification of America, a cartoon from Reason.
Here we go again. Administration outlines litany of charges against Syria, skirts question of new war, from Boston.com. Related: Are They Syrious? Next Stop: Damascus, from Reason.
Expressive Soles: Why Iraqis use shoes to shoo Saddam, from the Wall Street Journal. Taught me the word "discalced."
Jesus in Baghdad: Why we should keep Franklin Graham out of Iraq, from Slate.
New Agency, Old Problems: Family Says Bureaucratic Troubles Persist at Immigration Service, from the Washington Post.
Whoa! Saddam's 'love shack' discovered: Furnishings include shag carpet, Kuwaiti china, fantasy art, from CNN.com. Ed spotted this one.
CEO of the Cockpit #18: Early Learning, from AVweb, courtesy of Dad, about the magic of flying.
For all you equipment nerds. Wheels At The Redlands Bicycle Classic, from Bike.com.
Fitting punishment leaves man sleeping in dog house, from Boston.com.
The We Love the Iraqi Information Minister Web site, courtesy of Ed.
The brains behind Bush, from Salon (appeared in January). Did you know that Bush calls Karl Rove a "turd blossom"?
The battle for American science, from the Guardian.
Florida Judge Must Apologize for Remarks, from Reuters. "Once, addressing a defense attorney, Schapiro allegedly said: 'Do you know what I think of your argument?' and then pushed a button on a device that simulated the sound of a toilet flushing."
Puppy Recovers After Swallowing Knife, from Reuters. The x-ray is AMAZING.
Explorer trudged North Pole with broken ankle, from Reuters. "Hempleman-Adams did not tell his wife and three children he was going to the pole for fear they would worry about his safety. He told them he was going skiing instead."
Louisiana Says TV Show Will Mock Rural Americans, from Reuters. "The Louisiana Senate voted on Wednesday to protest the showing of "The Real Beverly Hillbillies," complaining the proposed reality show will poke fun at rural Americans." Too bad there's no stupid chick lobby to stick up for those girls on Joe Millionaire, eh?
As William Shatner said in Airplane II, "Irony can be pretty ironic sometimes." Rat-Trap Nets Fisherman, from Reuters.
Want a little something EGTRRA?, by Dave Barry, from the Miami Herald. It's tax season again....
Stopping the madness. Dry cleaner keeps the name French Cleaners, from Boston.com.
Employers in hard sell to boost doctor quality, from Boston.com.
Saddam thrives as collectible on eBay, from Boston.com.
Citizens Against Government Waste Identifies Record $22.5 Billion in Pork. Search the Pig Book.
Jobless? For a good time, call . . ., from The Plain Dealer (Cleveland). "Embarrassed agency officials learned this week that all of the unemployment checks sent during the first two weeks of February included a message that urged recipients to call a toll-free sex line to file an automated claim."
A tyrant brought down to earth, from the Times Online.
Amateur's Spam Mochi among winners in Waikiki, from the Honolulu Star-Bulletin.
Saddam Hussein as Surrogate Dictator, from the New York Times, about the quiet support of some Chinese for the war.
Town Seeks to Ban Political Smirks, from Reuters. I guess this would be... government on your face?
Restaurants Serve Up Hygiene to Win Back Patrons, from Reuters. Let me draw your attention to the last line... yeah, the one with the washing machine. Whoa.
Take that, America! German Professors Declare War on English Terms, from Reuters. This made me laugh so hard I almost spit out my Freedom Fries.
This disturbing item was sent in by Rachelita. A Disgusting Practice Vanishes With the Token, from the New York Times. This article is about... subway token sucking. Whoa.
Conn. Inn Offers to Do Guests' Taxes, from AP. The land of Ed's people.
Bush Subconsciously Sizes Up Spain For Invasion, from The Onion.
137 More Oil Wells Liberated For Democracy, from The Onion.
Don't Come Crying To Me When You Need Someone Who Speaks Elvish, from The Onion.
Scary. Free Mike Hawash.
Nevada vs. the Federal Reserve?, from Insight.
News of the Dirty War, from the Village Voice.
Caught in the Geraldo sideshow, from the Pioneer Press. "We later found out a few who shook his hand had put those hands in unmentionable places prior. Army justice?"
Pa. Lawmakers Propose 'Tax Me More' Fund, from Reuters. For all my fiscally liberal friends!
SARS Fear Boosts Neckties That Double as Masks, from Reuters.
Madam opens sex school, from The Evening Standard.
Whoa! Congress considers plan to lure people to rural areas, from Star-Tribune (Minnesota-St. Paul), about subsidizing the rural lifestyle. Reason's Jeff Taylor calls this the "Bumpkin Support Act."
Tellers laugh robber out of bank, from Boston.com.
Where the Squirrels Roam, from the New York Times. Courtesy of Rachelita and accompanied by the following pleasingly random comment: "About this article: I saw the albino squirrel again, just think he might just be old and grey because his eyes were not red. Look out for him in the Powderhouse area."
'The Best Possible Life', about Michael Kelly, from The New York Times. Courtesy of Rachelita.
Tonight's Opening Saturday Night Live Sketch, from Reason.com.
Troops Attempt To Spook Enemy Into Surrender, from the Washington Post.
How Moore 'blew it', by Roger Ebert, from the Chicago Sun-Times.
Democratic Imperialism: A Blueprint, from Policy Review.
Middle Ages were warmer than today, say scientists, from the Daily Telegraph.
Only in America. Camel becomes sheriff's deputy, from Boston.com.
My husband Ed kicks ass. (Today's our semi-anniversary, by the way.) He sent the following: "As background to [the aforementioned] Offense and Defense: The battle between Donald Rumsfeld and the Pentagon, from the New Yorker, you need to read Let's Not Forget: Bush Planned Iraq 'Regime Change' Before Becoming President, from Information Clearing House (reprinted from the Sunday Herald), as well as The Thirty-Year Itch, from Mother Jones, and Real Reasons for the US Invasion: The Current Strategic Agenda of the United States, from Aspects of India's Economy. Scary stuff."
This kicks ass. Kim Jong Il (the illmatic)'s LiveJournal. Look who's blogging now!
The Poetry of D.H. Rumsfeld: Recent works by the secretary of defense, from Slate.
Iraqi Man Risked All to Help Free American Soldier, from the Washington Post.
The Thin Envelope: Why college admissions has become unpredictable, from the New Yorker.
Lion tamer on run with lions, from Reuters. "A woman lion tamer has run away from a circus in Germany with eight lions, two tigers and the circus director's [20-year-old] son, police say."
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Sperm Turned on by Lily of the Valley, from Reuters.
Fashionable Facemasks Cover Deep Fears About Virus, from Reuters. Only in Hong Kong... No actually, I could see this happening in Japan, too.
Eatery Offers Menu for Tobacco-Deprived, from Reuters. "Bravo Bloomberg," he said. "It took Mayor Bloomberg to make us finally cook with tobacco in the kitchen. It's the invention of a new spice into the cuisine."
Dixie Chicks are welcome in Madison, from Boston.com. Dairyland Chicks has a nice ring to it.
Sometimes, I am just embarrassed to be American. Croissants spark debate, from Boston.com.
Halliburton Decides Against Bid in Iraq, from AP.
British marines under the kosh from local Iraqi soccer team, from AFP.
Couple Living Together 77 Years Marries, from AP.
Moral Clarity: An Unauthorized Glossary of War, from the Village Voice.
Mesopotamia. Babylon. The Tigris and Euphrates, from the Guardian, courtesy of Josh.
Forever Spam, from the Honolulu Star-Bulletin.
Coughing tips the scales of justice, from MSNBC. Courtesy of Rachelita.
Offense and Defense: The battle between Donald Rumsfeld and the Pentagon, by Seymour M. Hersh, from the New Yorker. Courtesy of Josh.
Tobacco Shortage Makes Marines Irritable, from the Seattle Post-Intelligencer.
On legislature's plate: Banning forked tongues, from the Chicago Tribune. Government in your mouth.
White House to End Drugs and Terror Ads, from AdAge.com.
Bragging Writes, from Washington Monthly, about presidential candidates' favorite books.
Exhibit honors Japanese diplomat who helped refugees flee Nazis, from the Honolulu Star-Bulletin.
Soup-Kitchen Volunteers Hate College-Application-Padding Brat, from The Onion.
Saddam Speech Suspiciously Mentions Nelly Song From Last Summer, from The Onion.
Bush Thought War Would Be Over By Now, from The Onion.
With God on His Side, from The New York Times. Courtesy of Rachelita.
UCI officially bans white knicks (scroll down), from Cyclingnews.com's April 1 "Special Edition."
Love Car Park to avoid mamma's eye, from Reuters.com.
The hills are alive.... U.S. Nuns Go on Trial for Military Break-In, from Reuters.
From the I'm Not Making This Up Department, an exchange that took place in my company's cafeteria:
Me: So I noticed you're serving Freedom Onion Soup. Is that some kind of a joke?
Chef boy: No, I spent all morning slicing onions.
Amusing/Interesting home.