| Random Thoughts |
| Satirising Ignorance since 1985! (without realising) |
| Why am I considered to have no sense of humour if I do not laugh at something which I don't think is funny? Why do some people expect me to understand their sense of humour if I've just met them? It would be absurd of me to expect them to appretiate anything I say which is meant to be funny, because it takes time for someone to aclimitise (my long word of the day, which I'm not sure is a word) themselves to a sense of humour that is different from theirs. So why do people think it ok to insult me with the excuse that they are "only joking"? It's not funny to me, so who are they trying to amuse? (By the way, before people notice it later, I am fully aware of the irony of me making a website about my sense of humour which critisises people who expect strangers to understand their sense of humour.) |
| Entry one: 10/09/01 |
| Entry two: 12/09/01 |
| Isn't it funny that, in this society where we teach our children that it is wrong to lie, there are so many jobs which require you not to tell the truth? Take burglery for example....actually, forget that. Being a doctor, for instance, requires you to withhold certain truths. If a woman has just given birth, the doctor always says "congratulations, it's a boy". They never say "OH MY GOD!!! IT'S UGLY!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" with the possible exception of when I was born. |
| Entry three: 14/09/01 |
| I visited the U.K. MENSA website and was amazed to find the serious observation: "One in fifty people are in the top 2% of the population". The website designer clearly isn't a member, it seems. Or he doesn't expect anyone who can see the obvious to try and become a member. Anyway, I'm going off now to set up DENSA, a organisation dedicated to making the bottom 98% of the population smarter than the top 2%. I'll get loads more funding than MENSA, since the magazine is going to 98% of the population, so I'll get loads of advertising deals. Actually, I'm not really. I'm not smart enough to get in. |
| Entry four: 17/09/01 |
| There was a program on Channel Four a while back that analysed the crime epidemic during the Blitz in World War II. Wasn't it just out-of-work electritians? |
| Entry five: 17/09/01 |
| I sometimes that some of the things metaphysists say are just said to make intellectuals feel insecure and normal people feel stupid. Stuff like the Universe only existing because we think it does, and other rubbish like that. It's all complicated nonsense that couldn't possibly be true. By the way, I am aware of the irony of me having a theory that states that all theories are false. |
| Entry six: 17/09/01 |
| Come to think of it, all generalizations are false. |
| Entry seven: 17/09/01 |
| How did they invent the drawing board? If they got it wrong, what did they go back to? |
| Entry eight: 17/09/01 |
| I think physists trying to find out how to make wormholes through time are looking in the completely wrong place. They should research pens. If anything knows how to miraculously disappear, it's them. |
| Entry nine: 24/09/01 |
| If all the world's a stage, then we'd better be getting paid fucking good money to act out life. I hate that analogy. It makes me think that there's an audience watching us, laughing. Sadistic bastards. |
| Entry ten: 12/10/01 |
| It amazes me how ignorant people can be. It sounds pompous, but I suppose everyone has some intellectual err in their thinking, like I've managed to get through life, until recently, not knowing what the words "epoch" and "anthropomorphic" meant. And I don't even know for certain why things stay in orbit, and why smaller things don't have gravitational fields. I'm embarressing myself just admitting that. Getting back to my point, people can be really dumb. Why does The Sun manage to sell so many copies? Why are we all scared of spiders? Why are you reading this, and why am I writing it, when we could be reading about much more important things? I'm getting too deep. This is a stupid thought. It isn't even funny. I need a shower. And a monk. |
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