NOTHING WITHOUT YOU
CHAPTER 1
This isn't supposed to happen. He was supposed to be fine. We sit here in this closed- in waiting room,I feel like I can't breath. I feel every breath I take in, I gasp. Everyone is sitting here either crying or their eyes closed,thinking when they open them,everything is going to go away. Me? I guess I just want to believe if I stare into space long enough maybe I'll fall into this other place,just where this isn't happening. My lungs tighten, how can anyone breath? I look around the room at my brothers. A.J.'s head is in his hands,shoulders shaking slightly. Howie, his eyes closed leaning on one of the walls. Tears take over him. Kevin.... At this point self pity leaves my body. He's clured up in a ball in the corner of the room,tears streaming down his face. At these long hours,not only am I loosing a bestfriend,he's loosing family. Blood. My brothers,I look around the room once again,hoping to find the man who we are all here for. Tears take over me,wishing to just see him,grab him into a hug,to tell him,I love him. I just keep telling myself over and over 'Frick and Frack,forever'.
Hours have passed. Why haven't any doctors come out yet? We are just sitting here, in this closed- in area,my hands are shaking. It's been hours since I've eaten anything. I feel like I'm breaking down by the minute.. I have no more tears to shed. The room is silent,no one dares to talk. What's there to say? Our brother is losing his life in the next room,and we're going to be in here talking about sports? Ha,ya right. Someones getting up. I feel someone touching my shoulder. This is good.,time for comforting eachother. I raise my head to see Kevin looking down at me. His eyes were never so gray before. He had dark bags under his eyes,like all of us. His face was tear stained. I was about to reach for his hand but stopped at the cold voice talking. "You want anything to drink?" Just that sentence,I never heard his vocie so cold,so numb,almost no feeling. I shook my head.I watched as he walked out of the room. I closed my eyes. We should comfort eachother,be there. Isn't this what brothers are supposed to do,comfort eachother? Yet no one dares to speak. Kevin was the frist to speak in hours,seems days to me. Hours still pass,just rocking back and forth,I wonder where Kevin is? He still hasn't come back. Maybe he just needed out, out of this room that gives everyone so much pain. I hear footsteps down the hall. I look up to see the doctor come in and take a seat in one of the chairs. Everyone there sits straight up,looking him in the eye. At this point Kevin follows into the room,takes a seat across from the doctor. I take a deep breath,wondering what words are going to come out of his mouth. The doctor sighs,"I really don't know what to say to you. Looking into all of your hoping eyes looking at me,breaks my heart, but you need to know this. We have done everything there is to help him,he's a very strong man,though I'm sorry to say not strong enough. I dont' t think he's going to make it, I'm so very sorry." Those words stabbed me in the heart. Just when I thought I shed all my tears,tears fall endlessly from my eyes. The faith I felt of him getting better,left my body the second he said those words. The faith that stuck me together,that stopped me from breaking down,ended. I broke down...
