Two weeks later, after multiple nights of being roused in the same manner, Lee and Amanda faced each other silently over breakfast. The dreams were always the same, the blackness and the voice overlaid by the whirring and clacking. And Lee never recalled exactly what was so important; only that he had to stop the voice. It was telling secrets and had to be stopped.

Their weariness showed clearly and Lee fought to stave off the frustration that was creeping up on him. ‘Why now? Why, just when we’re getting to a point that we can both live with and enjoy, are the nightmares getting worse?’ He demanded answers of himself that he didn’t have. If anything the nightmares should be better.

He was living in their home with his wife and family. His physical strength was returning; his mind was clearer day by day. But still, the nightmares, that had once only plagued him when he was alone, came nightly now. Accompanying them during the day, were flashbacks to the dream, that were indiscriminate about who witnessed them. Only yesterday, he’d scared the daylights out of Dotty by zoning out while helping her put groceries away.

“Lee, dear, put these on the top shelf for me. I won’t need them for several days anyway. The large size cans are in the way on lower shelves.”

He turned, smiling, and reached for the oversized cans of peaches Dotty extended to him. Reaching into the cabinet, he glanced down at the can in his hand. ‘Silverstone’ peaches. His head buzzed as he heard Dotty’s next words.

“My friend Darla gave me the best secret for Silverstone…”

Something in Lee’s head snapped and suddenly he heard not Dotty’s new recipe, but another voice, the voice, telling all the details of Operation Silverstone. Whirling around, he dropped the cans on the floor, grabbed Dotty’s shoulders and shook her. “Who told you about Silverstone? No one knows….. Who broke? Who sold us out?”

His glazed eyes did not see the badly frightened Dotty, but instead the inky blackness that hid his tormentor’s faces’. He shook her again, blinking as he did so to clear the veil from his vision.

From the front of the house, came the door slamming and Amanda’s voice calling, “Mother, Lee, I’m home.”

The bang and the words seemed to shake Lee from his fog and he blinked again, this time seeing who was in his hands and the wide-eyed distress on her face.

“Oh God, Dotty. Are you okay?” Lee released her and stepped away. He ran a shaking hand over his face and into his hair. He inhaled deeply, staring at his hands as if not recognizing them.

Amanda stepped into the room, halting as she saw the expressions on their faces. “Lee, sweetheart, what’s wrong?”

He could only shake his head; his voice hadn’t returned yet.

“Mother? What’s happened?” Amanda stepped forward and lingered between them, as if uncertain who to go to first.

Dotty looked from Lee to her daughter and back again. “I think Lee may have had a flashback of some sort.”

“What?” Amanda asked, incredulous.

“Now Amanda, darling, you know Mrs. Adam’s husband’s Gene? He served two tours in Vietnam and he told me once that he’s had flashbacks. I was even there one night when it happened. We were watching an old war movie and suddenly Gene sat up, jumped behind the couch and started looking for enemy soldiers. He got the strangest look in his eyes, like he was seeing something, but not what everyone else was seeing. Lee looked just like that just now.” Dotty appeared thoughtful and studied Lee for long moments. “The only thing is that Gene said something always happens to trigger the flashbacks for him, a loud noise; the sudden appearance of an Asian person in dark colors. I have no idea what might have triggered this for Lee, if that’s what it was. We were putting away the groceries!” She shrugged her shoulders in confusion.

“Mother, that’s a little far-fetched don’t you think?” Amanda looked at Lee to gauge his reaction to her mother’s theory.

Lee, having finally found his voice, spoke up. “I think she’s right, Amanda. I just don’t know what set it off. What did I say to you, Dotty?”

“You wanted to know who told me about the peaches…” Dotty shrugged again.

“Peaches?” Lee and Amanda asked simultaneously.

“Yes, peaches. I was telling him about the secret new recipe Darla gave me for peach pie. He was putting the oversize cans of peaches away in the top of the cabinet for me.”

Their eyes locked and Lee and Amanda communicated in the silent manner that had made them so effective in the field. Lee spoke first, “The cans.”

Together they searched for the cans, finding them on the floor, rolled under the edge of the counter where they had fallen when Lee grabbed Dotty. Each picked one up and studied the label. Their eyes grew large and understanding dawned… ‘Silverstone peaches’ the label proclaimed. ‘The best peaches ever.’

“Amanda, is Silverstone still active?” Lee spoke urgently.

He saw Amanda hesitate and thought it was for Dotty’s sake. Urging her out to the back yard and away from the house. “Well, is it?”

“Lee, I don’t think….” Amanda began stutteringly.

“I forgot, my security clearance isn’t reinstated. I’m sorry. I swore I wouldn’t ask you to compromise your integrity. I’m sorry.” Lee paced away, his aggravation easily detectable.

“No, Lee, that’s not it. I mean, your security clearances haven’t been reinstated, but they aren’t really necessary at this point…” She trailed off, as if unsure how to continue.

Lee returned to her and asked, “Not needed?”

“No, Operation Silverstone went belly up three weeks ago. The Germans have most, if not all of it, and we have no idea how they got it.” She spoke softly.

Lee had headed up Operation Silverstone, it had been his baby, and he had put in hundreds of hours on its security. He felt despair that it had all been lost. All the work and man-hours by the best agents in the intelligence business, wasted. Handed over to the Germans by an unknown. Or was it truly an unknown?

Staring up at the darkening evening sky, Lee suddenly remembered the voice betraying Silverstone. He felt a sinking suspicion that it wasn’t an unknown at all. He knew who it was. He just had to find some way to get it out of his head... and to deal with it later.

Now, the next morning after another sleepless night, he was more determined than ever. He announced his decision, knowing how his wife was going to react and how he was going to reply.

“Amanda, I’m going to see Pfaff today.” He reached across the table and gripped her hand.

“Are you sure you’re ready?” She held his hand and studied the crisscrossing of veins over the return of his healthy tan.

“No, but I have to be. I can’t stand not knowing. What if I can help find out how corrupted Silverstone is?” He looked at her, knowing she would understand.

Amanda studied him quietly. He met her eyes and wondered about the unease he saw there. “Amanda… what it is?”

“What?” She seemed startled, shaking herself out of her reverie and focusing on him completely, now.

“You’re looking at me strangely… like you don’t want me to do this… Why don’t you want me to do this?” Lee demanded of her.

“It’s not that I don’t want you to do this… I’m just not sure if you’re ready to know…” She left the thought hanging and Lee’s frustration grew.

“Of course I’m ready to know! Amanda… I’ve been an agent for fifteen years… I’ve never been in a situation like this. But I know how it needs to be treated. We have to find the traitor…” He swallowed and seemed to sink inside himself. “No matter who it is…” This morning he’d heard the voice echoing in his head as he woke and he had to wonder… He felt his gut twist and grab painfully. The acid rose in his throat and he knew he might be facing the most difficult task he’d ever set for himself. He had to deal with this betrayal… even if he was dealing with himself.

“I am going to see Pfaff today… I have to know, no matter what…”

“I know. And that’s why I’m going with you. We’re in this together, remember?” She reassured him. “For better or worse.”

He answered her easily, “In sickness and in health.” He forced a smile on his face and stood. Stretching over the table for a quick kiss, he murmured. “We’ve done the worse and the sickness, I’m ready for the better and the health.”

“Yeah, me, too, Lee, me, too.”

Together they stood, gathered jackets and for Amanda, a small briefcase, and headed out the door, to the Agency.