August 28, 2001

I was driving to College Avenue on Pleasant Valley Road, listening to these two black kids in a beat-up Camero yelling behind them, "I'll lick your pussy too!"

Whatever, right? I was waiting for the light to turn green, and they honked at me. I tried to ignore them, but thought, what the fuck...

They waved, and I waved back. You never know if someone is actually going to not be an ass.

"I'll lick your pussy!" The kid pulled his head back into the car, laughing at his wit. Then the car sped up.

I couldn't let them play this game by themselves, so when I caught up with them, I made sure he was looking at me, and gave him the finger and a smile.

He yelled, "Fuck you too, faggot!" and returned my finger.

I was annoyed at first, but then I realized this was Oakland's way of making me feel welcome.

It's a daily ritual here. You can't let the day go by without getting in someone's face, or having someone get into yours.

The only thing I was pissed at was they interrupted my train of thought. I was telling a joke at the time, something way better than "pussy licking."