Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Tim Roth, Helena Bonham Carter, Michael Clark Hunter
Directed by: Tim Burton

The opinion on Itoop is unanimous. That movie was some good cheese. Sure enough this remake of sci-fi classic, a story about an astronaught stranded on a planet where Apes have enslaved the human race is more full of comical situations than actual grim plot twists. The line, "I'm going to get my chimp!" delivered near the beginning of the movie by Mark Walberg establishes the tone for the rest of the movie.

After flying through a rather inconvenient time warp which appears out of nowhere, astronaut Leo Davidson is propelled through space and crash lands on a planet where humans are slaves. On the planet he meets a human rights activist (an ape named Ari, played by Bonham-Carter), and together they go off to free the human slaves by finding Leo's ship which he believes has come searching for him. All the while of course, they are being hunted down by those damn, dirty apes!

Now it may be my imagination, but it would seem they were implying some kind of interspecies romance between the two, which quite frankly made me very uncomfortable. Not to be close-minded or anything, with a perfectly good looking human female parading about in some revealing ragged clothing, (Estella Warren as Daena), one would think Mark Walberg would stick to his own!

What is really funny though is the performance of the two evil apes, General Thade (Tim Roth) and Attar (Michael Duncan Clarke). They are the only two non-civilized apes on the planet. They skulk about growling. I bust a gut laughing when Attar slams his fists on the dinner table, screams, "BOW YOUR HEADS!" and then proceeds to say grace. The other more dignified apes at the table look at him as if to say, "Well, that was rather awkward." And general Thade throws a magnificent wall jumping sword swinging tantrum which is worthy of the Cirque du Soleil.

So, if for no other reason than the hilarity that ensues from watching a society of Apes, this movie was very entertaining. The movie did, however, need a lot more action. A LOT more. Another huge dissapointment is that Tim Burton's signature bleak atmosphere seemed almost non-present in this movie. In most of his movies, the sets are so detailed and so personafied, they almost come to life like the windmill in Sleepy Hollow or that strange twisted tree. And don't get me started on the settings of Beetlejuice or Nightmare Before Christmas. Of all the worlds he has created, this one seemed to be the least memorable which is a shame, because this story seemed to lend itself to that kind of creativity. Not his best work, to say the least.

But, for anyone who has seen the original, keep your eyes open for lines from the first movie and a cameo by Charlton Heston. So sit back and enjoy the cheese!!!

MastaCSG
Ten

DroopyMcC		I would rather have rented this one. I am not a merry man. :(
Nine

JBo		Mindless entertainment.
Jack

ASY		Hyper cheese.
Nine