Even as a kid you learn rights and wrongs and things that are just plain dumb. Well I will let federal law, state/provincial law and your religion of choice, if any, teach you that. In saying that, why don�t you do things that are just plain fun or stupid for that matter? Well what better place then Wal-Mart to test some of these ideas out? Did you know Wal-Mart could be the best place in the world because no one really cares who you are or what you do there? In saying that here are some nifty ideas you can do at Wal-Mart.

Ever glue a quarter to the floor? Wal-Mart would be the perfect place to try this. The sight of someone fighting a lost cause is always amusing to me, and when someone actually gets it, it is amazing to see them admire themselves. Too generic you say, eh?

Here is a way to give people a quick scare. Hide in the circular clothes racks preferably longer clothes like dresses or pants. As people pass by shake an article of clothing and say, �Pick me, Pick me!� Once again, seeing people realize what just exactly happened, or walk away puzzled from the talking clothes rack amuses me. Still not good enough of a prank? Here�s another.

This is kind of crude, but worth a good laugh. Go to the pharmacy section, you know where you go to stock up on condoms and your Craps medicine, and start grabbing some embarrassing items. Some embarrassing items are: condoms, Monistat, Vagasil, KY Liquid, and hemorrhoid relief. Bring these items to the toy section and begin stocking the shelves. �Wow look at theses cool GI Joes, hey mommy, what are condoms?� A good chuckle once again.

Put on a life vest, and pick up a canoe paddle in the sporting goods section and commence paddling. This works best if you also have a person behind you, helping you row your air canoe. Shout comments like, �there�s a big whale�, or �watch out for that wave, whoa�, and appropriate motions for the comments. I did this, and not once did Wal-Mart's blue or red shirts say stop, and if they ask you what you are doing, testing out the equipment. Also clothes related, find un-matching clothes, I prefer a bathrobe and cowboy hat, and walk around greeting people. Blues might not care; avoid the reds at all costs.

Last but not least, go to the knitting and fabrics section, or the aquarium, because who really goes there? Hit the top left or second to top left speed dial button, this should be the intercom, and make a remark. �Elvis has left the building�, �paging a B Anus�, �B Anus please report to the pharmacy�, �Good-bye cruel, cruel world� are some suggestions.

A helpful hint is to avoid the Wal-Mart associates, people who work at Wal-Mart And wear those blue or red vests. Some blues I swear hate their job and don�t give a hoot, but other aspire to become a red. Reds or blues who think they are reds are dangerous; I give you this piece of advice: sometimes if you get busted, run. If you are in the middle of stuffing a body pillow in the frozen food freezer and you hear someone say hey what are you doing, run. Or if you are wearing Wal-Mart bags like a tank top (rip the bottom of the bag open, and kazam you have a authentic cheap imitation Wal-Mart vest) and you get caught impersonating an associate, run. Believe I have done all this stuff and it is fun, try it, that is if your balls are the size of small dogs, or drunk, whichever.