Toronto. Canada's largest city... and I mean BIG. Unless you drive down here across those five-lane highways and try to get around, you can't fathom the size of this city. Being without a car, I have to resort to using public transit to go to work and such.

Having lived in Ottawa, you quickly become spoiled taking the bus. In Ottawa, a bus can take you anywhere you want to be. While on study term, I didn't even have to time the bus, since it comes every 3 minutes. I took the bus when it was ready for me. But now Toronto - Here, trying figuring this one out:

The city of Toronto is surrounded by small cities like Markham, Scarborough, Brampton, etc. I officially live in Toronto but work in Markham. How could this be a source of grief, you might ask? "No probs T-Bone! Just buy a bus pass, right?" Wrong. Soooooo wrong. If you're in Toronto and the bus crosses the official border of Toronto in Markham, YOU MUST PAY THE MARKHAM FARE. Yep, many people have to buy two bus passes just to go to work. An easy $150 a month. Now I know why everyone drives. (Luckily I live close enough to the border that I can cross it and only pay one fare. Take that, cash-sucking leeches.)

Not only that, but getting any kind of information about the bus is nigh impossible. No one knows anything about the bus! I got the impression from reading the bus pamphlets that I needed an ID card to use my shiny new $68 bus pass. "Says right here, go to town hall to get one". All right, so I walk over there and ask the guy at the counter. After the most bewildering look, the following conversation ensues:

Guy: A bus photo ID?

Me: Yes.

Guy: Oh, we don't do that here anymore. You have to go somewhere else for that.

Me: *sigh* Ok, where is it?

Guy: Well, I can tell you where it is approximately. You go down highway 7, down to Yonge street, hang a left, then a right, [...] and it's this tall building, like 8 storeys tall [uses his hands to show me how tall].

Me: Uh huh. Is it too far to walk?

Guy: Oh yah, too far. A short drive though. I forget what the building is called. York... Region... something.

Me: Transit?

Guy: Yah! Could be - I dunno.

Apparently not. He directs me to the Information Desk of all places to get exact directions. They're no help either. I storm out of there, pretty pissed. Then I spot a bus stop with several people waiting, and it dawns on me. They MUST know! They take the bus! I glide over there, with spirits now soaring, just knowing that I'll get the info I need. But what do I get? Responses like "Uh, the liquor store?" or "go to so-and-so station to get one". And none of these people would even show me theirs.

And WHY not? Because after this entire excursion, ladies and gentlemen, you DON'T NEED NO PHOTO ID!!! ... sigh ...