"1. give her a big tshirt of yours to sleep in.
2. leave her cute text messages.
3. kiss her in front of your friends.
4. tell her she looks beautiful.
5. look into her eyes when you talk to her.
6. let her mess with your hair.
7. just walk around with her.
8. forgive her for her mistakes.
9. look at her like she's the only girl you see.
10. hold her hand when you're around people and in private.
11. let her fall asleep in your arms.
12. stay up all night with her when she's sick.
13. watch her favorite movie with her.
14. come up and grab her by the waist .
15. don't talk about other girls around her. If you love her, others shouldn't matter.
16. when she's sad, hang out with her.
17. let her know she's important.
18. kiss her in the pouring rain.
19. and when you tell her, love her like you've never loved someone before.
20. answer her phone calls no matter what
Guys repost as: I'd do this for my girl.
Girls repost as: Perfect boyfriend.
If you don't repost this in four minutes you will lose the one you love.
If you do repost this in four minutes the one you like/love will:
-call you
-kiss you
-message you"
Sarcasm? Hell yeah. I hate chainmails like these. Scratch that. I hate all chain mail. They are the biggest waste of time since reality tv and hip-hop. My sister (who is an Aberzombie, hip-hop loving, MySpace-using, fake media drone) was on her MySpace and I happened to see this bulletin, which her dumbass feminist friend wrote. It was dripping with so much bs, I found it dificult to deipher the words. Now that I have, I'm going to tear it apart in the hopes that I'll never get another chainmail again.
1. You sleep in the same thing every night? And why the hell would anyone want to do that? I hate sharing clothes. Even when I was a kid, if one of my friends ruined a shirt or something and wanted to borrow one I'd tell him to walk home and get his own damn clothes. And if a girlfriend asked me to sleep in her clothing, a few years in jail for domestic abuse would be worth it.
2. HELL NO! FSM, I hate text messaging. Remember when I said hip-hop and reality tvl were the biggest wastes of time? I stand corrected. Text messaging sucks. I could probably write an entire article on how much it sucks. Just friggen call the person! It's a hell of a lot quicker and it's cheaper. The only time a text is better is when you should not be using the damn phone anyway. One of my friends used to text message constantly when I was around him. Was being the operative word, because I cut off his fingers.
3. Is making your girlfriend look like a public whore in front of your friends seriously the difference between a good boyfriend and a bad one in the mind of a woman? If so, it seems I have very, very poor dating skills and those assholes I went out with didn't bother to tell me until we broke up!
4. Unless she recently had a severely abusive relationship, she shoul have enough self-esteem to know when she looks good or bad. My sister got this from a feminist too. So, apparently, although women are totally superior to men, their opinions of themselves are completely dependent on the opinion of a guy. I'll have to write an article on how much feminists suck too.
5. Ladies, I think we both know that straight men look below your eyes when they talk.
6. What is it with girls and hair? Hair is just another way of disposing of the body's waste. So, unless you're planning to play with my other wastes, keep your hands off of my hair.
7. ...and? Walking! WOW! Exhilerating!
8. I'll do that if and only if you never bring up anything I've done wrong more than three days ago when we are arguing.
9. So basically you want me to live a lie?
10. Around people or in private? As opposed to what? Is around trees considered not quite private, but also kind of public?
11. If you fall asleep in my arms, I'll drop you on your lazy ass. If you think I'm carrying you to your bed, you're fucking crazy. Unless you're already in your bed, then it's ok.
The Bullshit Marathon Continues!