FOR ANOTHER GRIEVING HEART
For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face
of my Father in heaven." Matthew 18:10
I FOUND THE ANSWERS
Several people wrote to me to tell me that they cannot understand why a healthy looking baby like Vincent can die?
There are also others who told me that they cannot understand why a small baby like him has to suffer?
However, these are the two questions that seldom crossed my mind.
And I am very glad that they don't.
Unless you are one of Vincent's doctors or nurses, you will never know the amount of things that he had gone through.
If I were to describe it, it would leave Vincent with no dignity but a source of pity.
What you have read and seen in the two websites Precious Child in Heaven and My Little Hero portrayed Vincent as the Little Hero.
Indeed he was and will be forever.
If I can turn back time and given a choice of whether I want to conceive him and ended up with a broken heart like I am now, I would choose the broken heart.
And you may find that I am mad to be thankful that of all women, God chose me to be his mother. I am honoured that God gave me this trial and tribulations because Vincent is not an ordinary baby.
I hope everyone can have the same view with me that there is no perfection in this world.
There has to be pain for joy.
There has to be sadness for gladness.
We cannot escape pain because it is an important tool that makes us survive in this world. Though Vincent did went through a great amount of pain from our adults view, I believe most of the time a little baby like him are spared from many of the discomfort that we perceived.
You may think that I am kidding myself but that is the only way to think.
But why did he have to die?
Well, to begin with he was not meant to be here for long. Though he was only here for 7 months, he had achieved a lot thing that many of us adults cannot achieve in a lifetime. The amount of compassion, love, respect and care that he received and given back in return is something amazing and only with God's grace.
So, today I finally found the answers and I am at peace with myself and
I am calm.
Entries made by Lilian/June 23rd 2002
