Redneck Medical Dictnary
Bacteria........................Back door to cafeteria
Benign..........................What you be after you be eight
Cauterize......................Made eye contact with her
Cesarean Section..........A neighborhood in Rome
Colic............................A sheep dog
Coma...........................A punctuation mark
D&C............................Where Washington is
Dilate...........................To live longer than your kids do
Enema..........................Not a friend
Fester...........................Quicker than someone else
Fibula...........................A small lie
G.I.Series....................World Series of military baseball
Hangnail......................What you hang your coat on
Hospital.......................The biggest building in town, other than Joe's feed warehouse or Franks lumber mill
Labor Pain...................Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff................A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown with a snake.
Morbid........................A higher offer than I bid
Nitrates.......................Cheaper than day rates
Node...........................I knew it
Outpatient...................A person who has fainted
Pap Smear...................A fatherhood test
Pelvis...........................Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative.............A letter carrier
Impotent......................Distinguished, well known
Recovery Room...........Place to do upholstery
Secretion.....................Hiding something
Seizure..............Roman emperor who lived in the Ceasarean Section
Tablet........A small table to change babies on
Terminal Illness...........Getting sick at the train station
Tumor........................More than one
Urine..........................Opposite of mine
Varicose......................Near by
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Page created on May 29, 2001.