redneck    medical dictnary




Cesarean Section..........A neighborhood in Rome
Bacteria........................Back door to cafeteria.
Benign..........................What you be after you be eight.
Cauterize......................Made eye contact with her.         .
Colic............................A sheep dog.
Coma...........................A punctuation mark.          .
D&C............................Where Washington is.
Dilate...........................To live longer than your kids do
Enema..........................Not a friend.
Fester...........................Quicker than someone else
Fibula...........................A small lie.
G.I.Series....................World Series of military baseball.
Hangnail......................What you hang your coat on.
Hospital.......................The biggest building in town, other
             than Joe's feed warehouse or Franks lumber mill.
Labor Pain...................Getting hurt at work.
Medical Staff................A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown
with a snake.

Morbid........................A higher offer than I bid.
Nitrates.......................Cheaper than day rates.
Node...........................I knew it.
Outpatient...................A person who has fainted.
Pap Smear...................A fatherhood test
Pelvis...........................Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative.............A letter carrier.
Impotent......................Distinguished, well known.
Recovery Room...........Place to do upholstery
Secretion.....................Hiding something
Seizure..............Roman emperor who lived in the Ceasarean Section
Tablet........A small table to change babies on.        .
Terminal Illness...........Getting sick at the train station
Tumor........................More than one.
Urine..........................Opposite of mine.
Varicose......................Near by