The Interrogation

By Beverly Greene

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"I...I don't...."

"You said that you are a lesbian because you love women."

"Yes."

"Did you not love women while you were in dating men?"

"I...I don't know....yea...I guess so. I just didn't know it at the time."

"How can you not know that you love women?"

"Well, it was difficult. I didn't know any other lesbians. I had never been exposed to anyone who was gay or lesbian. I had always been told that it was evil, so I couldn't admit to myself the feelings that I had. I guess that that was why I dated men. It was what girls my age were supposed to be doing and I thought that if I did it too then I would be normal and my feelings for women would go away."

"So, you tried to erase your love for women?"

"Yes, I suppose that you could say that."

"Yes. And would it not also be fair to say that you actually hoped to eliminate your feelings towards other women by dating men?"

"Yes, I guess that that is true as well."

"When exactly did you realize that you had feelings for other women?"

"I...I suppose it was.....it was when I was around 14 or so I guess."

"Fine. So, at 14 did you image kissing another girl your age?"

"Yes, of course. All kids that age imaging kissing someone. It's only natural."

"It's only natural, you say, but did you actually kiss another girl?"

"Well, no. I couldn't tell anyone about my feelings as I said before. I couldn't let anyone know that I was different. I couldn't tell anyone that I might be a lesbian."

"MIGHT be a lesbian? So, you were not sure if you were actually a lesbian or not. Is that what you are saying?"

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