| Hello, I'm Nikki. |
| Sorry if this page leaves a bit to be desired right now... it's been ages since I've spent much time in the outside world, and, as you can guess, that leaves your communication abilities a little... well...bland. |
| O.k., about me... I'm a 16 year old female. I was "born" in 1983 when the body was 13. I chose my name from a prince song that, at the time, described the way I lived. I'm now ashamed of that, but I like to think of my name more like a shortened form of "Nikita". More like "La Femme Nikita" and less like Traci Lords. Get it? A little more class, a little less humiliation. |
| The reason for my birth is so that the Paradox could have relationships with men (boys?). Socially, nobody in the system was equipped to deal with that one. Enter Nikki. |
| Of course, that's not all there is to me. I am a whole person outside of pleasing men. It's just that I am the one who makes relationships happen when someone in the system wants one. I don't necessarily stick around to maintain them, but I get them off on the right(?) foot. |
| I'm the most "visible freak" of the Paradox in terms of appearance. I'm the one who got sick of never feeling pretty enough for the conservative hicks where we lived, so I decided I might as well look the way I wanted. My hair has been every color of the rainbow (my favorites have been fuschia and ocean blue, and of course basic black). Our grandmother used to say I was like a crow... attracted to shiny things and bright colors. I like that analogy. |
| Hmmm...what next? How about the things I like: music (mostly gothy stuff, techno, industrial... I'll include some links when I get the chance), conversation (I crave it!), smoking (my predecessors started that habit, but I took it up with a vengeance hehehe), alcohol (ditto on that last parenthetical phrase), mind-altering substances (thc, lsd, shrooms - yum), books (Aldous Huxley, Douglas Coupland, Tom Robbins, Kurt Vonnegut, Anais Nin, Henry Rollins), movies (Natural Born Killers, The Matrix, 13th Floor, Kalifornia, True Romance, Hackers), sex (self explanatory, except that I'm not gender-specific), and computers (games and games and more games, and sometimes web stuff too), shopping (for clothes, what else?). I like summer and sunshine and being in the city. I like tatoos (I still only have one - insert pout here) and piercings (to which I am allergic - insert bigger pout) and the wind in my long hair. I like dramatic makeup and garish clothing. I like to play pool. I like to dance. I like to laugh. |
| What I don't like: prejudice, generalizations, criticism, hatred, anger, monogamy, homogeneity, routine, stoicism, silence, lonliness, police, government, religion, violence, willful ignorance, selfishness, and poverty. |
| I've grown up a lot these last few years. I haven't changed so much, but my behaviour has. I am learning to conduct my life in a way that doesn't impede others so drastically. I make concessions like not dying my hair when it will get Dana fired, or not picking up that interesting guy/girl because it will hurt R's feelings. It drives me nuts sometimes, but I am trying (which is why I've stayed inside a lot recently). It's not that I stopped wanting to do all these things, but I know now I was so busy demanding time out for ME that I wasn't thinking about how my actions could make some of the Paradox members' life pretty difficult. We're still looking for that balance. |
| Hopefully, I'll get the chance to improve this page with time. I've got lots of ideas! |