Episode 1
Episode 2
Episode 3
Episode 4
Episode 5

Episode Three:

Hooking up and Coming Undone

It was a Wednesday night and Adrian usually had the night off, but Toni was in town and when that bitch was in town everything got shoved on its ear. Adrian closed out the bar – at least it closed at 10:00 on Sunday, and then she had to help close up the kitchen as well because Stella wasn’t there… because Toni was in town.

            It was fair to say that Adrian hated Toni, and she hated her too frequent intrusions into her life.

            Toni was the competition. She wanted Stella, Toni had Stella, so Toni was in the way. Still at first she’d tried very hard to like Toni. She respected Stella’s status as taken and just tried to shove her own feelings way down where they couldn’t cause any trouble. The problem was there was nothing about Toni that Adrian respected much less liked. Toni had probably been good looking at some point. She wasn’t ugly, just hugely obese. Toni had an interesting, even exciting job, and there was no doubt that she was smart, but she was also a humorless, egotistical, self-centered, manipulative bitch who thrived on drama. In short – personality wise – she was everything that Stella wasn’t. Why Stella had chosen her of all the women in the world Adrian had no idea. Stella was the most beautiful, together person she’d ever known. There was a no more compassionate, warm or wonderful person in the world and what she was doing with that arrogant cunt was beyond Adrian’s comprehension.

            That she chose Toni over Adrian did things to Adrian’s self esteem she couldn’t even begin to put in perspective.

            Jerry and Jan left and she locked down doors for the evening and started walking home.

            Toni was too good to help out at the caf�. Hell, Toni thought she was too damn good to do anything but sit around on her ass all day playing with her fucking laptop. She never helped Stella out and in fact delighted in saying that she worked less and made more money than Stella did, but Adrian knew that was a lie. Toni didn’t make money; Toni spent money, usually Stella’s money.

            The thing she hated most about Toni was that she always wanted Stella to sell everything she had in Shea City and hit the road with her. Everyone knew Stella loved Shea City and Rhonda’s.

            No that wasn’t true the thing Adrian most hated about Toni was that Toni was the only thing standing between her and Stella.

            As she walked in the apartment building she could hear Toni screaming at Stella. She couldn’t hear what the bitch was saying or what Stella might be saying back, but she could tell she was having a fit again and this was just another reason for Adrian to hate Toni.

            She turned around and went right back outside, took a deep breath and just started walking. She soon found herself in Changes with a beer in one hand and a brunette in the other and she went home with her and screwed the nameless woman’s brains out mostly so she wouldn’t have to hear Toni yelling at Stella. By the time she got home at 2:00 in the morning it was quiet in the house again.

“Closed, dammit!” Tammy said.

            “Says it’s closed Mondays,” Francis said feeling the same way Tammy did about it. Their first day of classes had sucked. They’d both gotten lost on campus a half a dozen times and there were too many people who seemed to know right were everything was and just what to do, that’s what was off putting, not so much that they didn’t know what they were doing, but that everyone else did. “We could check out the book store, the sign out front says they have cappuccino.”

            Tammy nodded and they walked to the book store. They ordered a couple of cappuccinos found a table and sat down. “This sucks,” Tammy said in a whisper.

            “We might try actually looking at some books,” Francis said with a smile.

            “The last thing I want to look at is books,” Tammy said, and she wasn’t kidding, she was a jock not a student. Classes were just something she had to get through so that she could play ball.

            The store was pretty full and Francis saw several people she’d seen at Rhonda’s.

            The red head who had told them about Rhonda’s in the first place was there and she walked over and sat down by them a cappuccino in hand. “Hi.”

            “Hello, good to see you again,” Tammy said quickly, no doubt just glad someone was going to talk to them. Most of the inhabitants of the book store looked like those boring types that just stood around pontificating on nothing. The ones that didn’t were obviously with friends and sometimes those people could be even less approachable because… well they didn’t want to meet new people because they already had people to hang out with. Tammy and Francis had come here to interact with people like them not just sit in a different place drinking bad cappuccino. So they were glad for the company. “Thanks for the tip about Rhonda’s, that’s a great place we had a blast.”

            “Too bad it’s closed Mondays,” Francis said with a bit of a pout.

            “Stella has to get out of Rhonda’s sometime,” she said. “My name’s Faye.”

            They introduced themselves.

            “I just came in to get a book.” She put a bag on the table. “I’m a trauma nurse so I work in the ER I have to do the 11PM to 7AM shift for the next week which sucks and I like to have a book to read on my breaks or if it actually gets slow.”

“That sounds like a rough job,” Francis said.

“Yeah, but I like it.” Faye shrugged. “You know if you guys would just like to hang out we could go over to Stella’s House…”

            “Oh we wouldn’t want to bother her on her day off,” Francis said.

            Faye laughed. “Stella’s House is the name of the apartment building where I live; it’s just behind Rhonda’s. We have a rec room where we all hang out.”

            “Would it be all right?”

            “Sure, we’re allowed to have guests. Hell, half the population of B Street runs in and out of Stella’s House on a regular basis.”

The four story red brick building looked warm and inviting. The front door opened into a hall with two doors on each side with a door going outside at the end of it. The apartments had to be huge. In the middle on the left wall there was a service elevator and next to that a staircase going up.

            “Stella’s apartment is the first door on the left,” Faye added in a whisper. “Don’t get too close; the bitch is in town.” She started talking normally as she walked. “The door on the right is Adrian’s apartment, the next one there on the left is my apartment, and this one is the rec room.”

            She didn’t really have to tell them that. There was a six-foot arched door way with no door opening into it, and it was so cool Francis’ eyes couldn’t decide where to look first. The wall to the kitchen had been opened up and a bar had been put in. All the other walls except those obviously around the bathroom had been ripped out and huge wooden beams that were supported every six feet by huge, hulking chunks of cedar logs put in for support in their place. The floor was old mosaic tiles obviously recently patched. There were several tables and chairs, a couple of couches, a TV, a stereo system with surround sound, and there was a foosball table, a pool table, a weight set and a stationary bike. The tall ceiling was painted stark white and the walls... Francis found herself taking a double take; the walls were made to look like a mirror image of the room right down to the tables and chairs and people and other objects, each wall a reflection of what was in front of it.

            “Cool, huh? And you should see how it fucks up drunks,” Faye said.

            “That’s Jerry and his partner Chad playing pool. My ex,” she made a face, “Jan’s in the kitchen probably making coffee, and that’s Millie plopped on the couch reading a book. Hey guys! This is Tammy and Francis.”

            “This place rocks,” Tammy said. “We should so get an apartment here next semester, Francis.”

            “We’re filled up right now,” Faye said.

            “But never fear the Dykes change with the seasons,” Chad said with a smile.

            They could hear screaming like fighting.

            “Crank the stereo the bitch is at it again,” Millie said looking up from her book.

            “Stella’s girlfriend Toni, no one likes her, that’s mostly why,” Faye said in a whisper.

            “I thought, well I sort of thought Adrian and Stella were together,” Tammy said.

            “Well that’s the other reason we don’t like Toni,” Faye said still whispering. “We all think Stella ought to be with Adrian, too.”

            “Damn, Faye,” Jan said, walking into the room with a big bowl of popcorn. Jan was dark headed with brown eyes. She was about 5 foot 6 with a perfect, hard body, tattoos up and down her arms, about a dozen rings in her right ear, and a stud in her tongue. “Do you have to tell everyone everything you think?” She sat down at one of the tables and set the bowl down. “You guys want some?” Soon everyone was at the table munching on corn.

            “Thanks,” Francis said grabbing a handful. “You guys must love living here.”

            “Yeah, it’s like living in a frat house without all the bullshit,” Chad said. “Stella screens potential residents and manages to keep any real assholes from getting in.”

            “Except for the one she puts in her own bed,” Millie said.

            “You guys!” Jan protested.

            “What?” Jerry said. “It’s true. Hell, you’re usually the first one talking shit about Toni.”

            “Yeah, but not to strangers,” Jan said.

            “Luckily Toni thinks she’s too good to ever come in here with the rabble, so there’s no real fear she’s going to walk in and catch us trashing her out,” Faye said.

            “But Stella might,” Jan said.

            Faye just shrugged as if to say she didn’t care, and you got the impression that Faye had already told Stella what she thought of her mate.

            “Won’t step foot in Rhonda’s, either,” Jerry said. “Afraid someone might ask her to get her hands dirty.” And it was then that Francis recognized him as one of the waiters who worked in Rhonda’s.

            “Most of the time I’m glad I can’t hear what she’s screaming at Stella about, but sometimes I just wish I could hear it so I’d know just what she’s got her panties in such a twist over,” Millie said. “I wanted to ask Stella if I could get a dog…”

            They all sighed as a company and looked at Tammy and Francis in turn, and then Jan said, “She knows damn good and well it’s against the rules and that Stella isn’t going to cave.”

            “I’m lonely. With Marcella gone the apartment seems so big,” Millie defended.

            “Marcella’s a big girl. A puppy isn’t going to fill that void, love,” Chad said.

            “Besides Marcella doesn’t like dogs. If you get one while she’s gone she’ll likely pinch your head off when she gets home,” Jan said.

            “Marcella won’t tell me no, not ever again if she knows what’s good for her. The point is that I want to know if it’s safe to even ask Stella again, and I’m afraid to even approach her since I have no idea what that crazy bitch is screaming about.”

            “Well I have a common wall with them,” Faye said, “and if I stick my stethoscope against it…”

            “Faye you don’t,” Millie said with a laugh.

            “That’s just wrong, Faye,” Jan said.

            “Well if you wouldn’t know wrong, who would?  Don’t act like you haven’t done it with me,” Faye said.

            “Oh I’d do it!  I just wouldn’t tell everyone about it,” Jan said with a laugh.

            “So, what’s the bitch always screaming about?” Chad asked.

            “Pick something. She hates this town, she hates the apartment building, she hates Rhonda’s, and she really, really hates Adrian. Depending on the stage of the moon she wants Stella to leave Shea City, sell Stella’s House, sell Rhonda’s, or fire Adrian. And that’s just the almost sane shit she screams about,” Faye said. “Hell one of the worst fights they ever had was over the way Toni said Stella was looking at someone on TV.”

            “You’re kidding,” Jan said.

            “I’m not,” Faye insisted. “Said Stella never looked at her that way.”

            “What’s Stella say?”

            “Mostly nothing. Just takes it and tries to calm Toni down. Never even raises her voice.”

            “How could anyone hate Adrian Bar?” Chad said. “Adrian’s the salt of the earth, the nicest, coolest, most talented person I’ve ever known.”

            “Maybe her bitch is in love with Adrian, too,” Jerry said feigning despair.

            “You know me, honey, I’m just a bottom always looking for a top,” Chad teased back.

            “You have me! You’re supposed to have stopped looking,” Jerry said with a mock pout.

            “No, I had to stop fucking other people we never said anything about looking, and let’s face it, sugar, Adrian is much more manly than you are.”

            “Don’t you think if Toni was out of the picture that Adrian and Stella would hook up?” Millie asked.

            “I don’t know.” Jan shrugged. She looked at Jerry with some private meaning. “They damn near did hook up once, but someone blew that.”

            Jerry mumbled something none of them could make out.

            Faye shrugged. “When Adrian first came here three years ago I caught Stella just watching Adrian one day while she was working and I asked Stella that very question because she had the lust in her eyes. Stella said then that Adrian was way too young for her, and that they came from two completely different worlds and experiences. But it sounded like bullshit. The stuff you tell yourself to keep yourself from doing what you want to do.”

The conversation went on buzzing like that till all the popcorn was gone and Chad got up to make some more saying it was his turn. Then suddenly it was dead quiet and when Francis looked up she knew why; Adrian was standing there.

Beautiful. The woman was just absolutely stunning standing there framed by the doorway wearing baggy, straight-legged jeans and a wife beater tee shirt with no bra, apparently oblivious to the fact that you could see her dark nipples right through it. She had a one-inch band rainbow colors tattoo that went all the way around her upper left arm that matched the one Jan also had to go with about fifty other ones. When Adrian seemed to notice the silence a smile spread across her face and she walked right up to the table.

            “Let me guess you’re all bitching about – Toni.”

            “Ah yeah, that was it, bitching about Toni,” Jan said almost too quickly.

            Adrian grabbed a chair turned it around and sat on it backwards resting her chin on the back of it, and then Francis couldn’t see her nipples any more and she didn’t know if she was glad or disappointed. Adrian was checking her out in a way that made her feel positively naked, and she was pretty sure that she liked it.

            “You do realize that you can see your nipples through that shirt right?” Chad said

            “So… I’m home,” Adrian said with a shrug. “I was actually going to go work in the basement but ‘Toni’ has a cow if I run power tools or the stereo after eight and I can actually hear her screaming worse down there. Don’t know why maybe it comes through the pipes or something.” Then she grinned wildly. “Like all the other crap.”

            Everyone cracked up.

            Suddenly the screaming down the hall stopped. Everyone seemed to sigh with relief.

            “So you two,” Adrian asked she and Tammy. “Are you two a couple or just friends?”

            “Just friends,” they said together which made everyone else laugh.

            “You’re both gay though right?” Faye asked.

            “I’m bi actually,” Francis said.

            “That’s a fucking crying shame,” Adrian said, looking frustrated like she was about to get some candy and someone had taken it away.

            “Adrian!” Millie protested. Adrian just shrugged and turned to Tammy.

            “You’re like me,” Adrian said. “You don’t have to announce what side your bread’s buttered on; everyone knows what we are.”

            “And yet she’s in the closet,” Francis told them with an incredulous look. Not liking at all that Adrian’s attention had suddenly turned completely away from her as if she had some communicable disease.

            Adrian stood up laughing and slapped Tammy on the back. “Good luck with that,” she said winking, and started to walk away.

            “Where you going, ain’t you gonna hang out?” Jan asked.

            “Nope. I’m feeling mighty randy and I don’t want to do any of you and,” she looked at Francis with something akin to regret, “I’d love to do you, but I don’t sleep with bisexuals.”

            And as Francis sat there with her mouth hanging open, Adrian turned on her heel and walked out of the room. Tammy laughed at Francis and slugged her in the arm.

            “Ouch,” Francis said rubbing her arm. “What, is it time for all the butches in the room to torture me?”

            Faye smiled. “Jan and I haven’t tortured you yet, but if you’d like…”

            “Since when are you a butch, Faye?” Jan said with a laugh.

            “I’m butch,” Faye said indignantly. Then she smiled, “I can use a power saw and I have a pocket knife.”

            “Is it in your pocket?” Millie asked.

            “No.”

            “Then it doesn’t count,” Millie said. “Marcella says it only counts if you have it in your pocket.”

            “What does Adrian have against bisexuals?” Francis asked with curiosity and more than a little hurt.

            “Nothing. She just doesn’t sleep with them,” Jan said. “She likes very feminine women and doesn’t like it if they’ve ever slept with a man, much less still are.”

            “I really don’t get the whole butch/fem thing,” Faye said shaking it off. “Doesn’t society put enough labels on us without us doing it to ourselves? What’s it really mean? We’re all women who like women, even our little bisexual here,” she smiled seductively at Francis. “Do you care whether a woman is fem or butch?”

            “Francis doesn’t care about anything after she sees if they’re breathing or not,” Tammy said with a disapproving smirk, “and I’m not sure she wouldn’t screw a dead guy if rigger had set in.”

            Everyone laughed but Francis, who just stared at her best friend with dumbfounded horror. She couldn’t believe Tammy would say something like that to virtual strangers.

            “That’s not exactly true,” Francis stammered out.

            “Hey, I don’t have Adrian’s prejudices, would you like to come see my mural?” Faye asked.

            “What?” Francis asked and all the apartment dwellers – except Jan – laughed louder.

            “My mural.” Faye stood up walked over and took her hand. “Would you like to see my mural?” She winked and Francis smiled and stood up.

            “I’d love to see your mural.”

            Tammy shook her head.

            “You really aren’t a couple?” Jerry asked carefully, no doubt seeing the anxious look on Tammy’s face.

            “No, no chemistry.” Jan looked at her like she was crazy and she had to explain herself. “Oh… I know Francis is beautiful. I mean she’s distractingly physically appealing, but I know too much about her. For one thing… well she’s my best friend and a total whore. She’s constantly landing in the middle of one drama or other caused by her inability to keep her damn legs shut,” Tammy said, then she laughed. “I just don’t find that very desirable. Truth is I’m a little upset because… well, we just met you guys, and I’m sure this is going to start some drama, and I like it here.”

            “Don’t sweat it. You’re not banging Faye, and at least your friend is safe with Faye. Her only fault is that she sleeps with damn near every woman she meets as soon as she meets them and tends to fall in love with whoever she fucks. Hence the drama which always surrounds Faye,” Millie said.

            Jan glared at her and said without explanation, “Fuck you, Millie.”

            Tammy ignored Jan, “And the drama Francis always finds herself in.”

            Tammy looked Millie over again; she was almost too attractive to be real. A body that wouldn’t quit, nice big boobs, wide hips and a tiny waist. Long, wavy black hair and brown eyes so dark they were almost black with a twinkle of mischief in them. She had a perfect golden tan and a smile that seemed to promise sex.

            “I didn’t want to say anything in front of your friend, but the reason Adrian doesn’t sleep with bisexuals is because she’s a diseaseaphobe,” Chad said in a defensive tone.

            Tammy nodded. “I get that. I worry about Francis all the time. I’m always trying to get her to go get tested for… well everything.”

“Women that are going to sleep around need to protect themselves especially if they’re having sex with men,” Millie said.

“Thanks a lot, Millie,” Chad said. “I thought Adrian was the only one around here that thought all men were nothing more than walking piles of disease looking to infect some poor defenseless woman.”

“It’s nothing personal, but Adrian does have a point. Gay women would be safe from all venereal disease if it wasn’t for bisexuals,” Millie said. “I heard a line in a movie once that said it perfectly.” She looked thoughtful for a moment and then said, “It was a disease carried by men that afflicted women.”

“Thanks, I feel much better now,” Chad said.

“Chill out, baby. After all, we’ve been tested, and we aren’t sleeping around, and certainly not with women – so we aren’t who they’re bitching about,” Jerry said patting Chad on the back.

“I just hate it when all the dykes start their man hating crap.”

Millie smiled and Tammy’s heart quickened. The woman was just incredibly hot; she just oozed raw sex appeal. “We don’t hate men, Chad, we just think they’re filthy and disease ridden and we don’t want to fuck them.”

All the women laughed.

“Fuck you, Millie!” Chad said, though he didn’t sound as mad as his words implied.

“I think the fact that I don’t want to is what we’re talking about here.” Her smile reached her dark brown eyes, and Chad seemed to instantly get over being even the slightest bit angry.

“Bitch,” he muttered.

“Want a cup of coffee?” Jan asked Tammy with a chuckle.

            “Sure,” Tammy said. Jan went to get it and Tammy thought might as well who knows when Francis will get done and I can’t just leave her here by herself… not that she would be by herself but I wouldn’t want her walking back to the dorm by herself at God alone knows what time in the morning. Maybe I should try decaf. I’ve got my first practice tomorrow; I need to be at my best. Stupid Francis and her stinky libido. Well at least I can’t complain about the view.

            “Jan still can’t stand it when Faye’s with anyone else, but she ruined the relationship, so she deserves to sweat.” Millie leaned across the table and whispered to her.

Jan set the coffee in front of Tammy and glared at Millie again, so Tammy got the impression that she knew she’d talked about her as soon as she left the room.

            “Thanks,” Tammy said.

            “So what are you taking?” Millie asked.

            “I’ll just drink it black.”

            Millie chuckled, “I meant at school.”

            “Phys. Ed, and yes I know that’s stereotypical, but I didn’t know what else to take as a major. I’m really not very academic minded. Mostly just want to play ball. I’d like to be professional eventually.”

            “What do you play?” Jan asked.

            “Basketball. I played center at home, but I imagine I’ll get a forward position here since at least half the girls are taller than I am. Hell, I don’t even know if I’ll be able to make first string.”

            “How tall are you?” Chad asked.

            “Six three,” Tammy said. When she was a kid she’d been extremely embarrassed by her height then she’d found basket ball and now… well she wouldn’t mind having a couple more inches of height about now just to give her an edge.

            “I’ve got a much better question,” Jerry said. They all looked at him and then he asked Tammy. “Before we sit here drinking coffee and gossiping about everyone we know while Faye has sex with your friend, just how old is she?”

            Everyone seemed to stop breathing while they waited for Tammy to answer, so she almost lied just to see how they would react, but then she said, “She’s nineteen. We’re both nineteen.”

            They all started breathing again and Millie explained. “Having sex with an underage person is grounds for eviction from Stella’s House.”

            “Stella has a lot of rules,” Jan said.

            “I don’t know about the rest of you, but Jerry and I stay here because of the rules. I have had enough chicken hawks and drug addicted neighbors to last me a lifetime.”

            “Just what is a chicken hawk? I saw that on the sign in front of Rhonda’s, too,” Tammy asked.

            “Older people who hang out in the bars picking up teenagers,” Jan explained. “We don’t allow it. Sometimes… well some of these kids they’re not queer at all just sexually confused, and these guys will give them drugs and alcohol and fuck 'em. It’s a bad scene.”

            “Sounds like it’s almost pedophilia.”

“Similar yeah,” Jerry said. “Some of the same psychology behind it I’m sure. Find someone young you can bully into doing what you want to do, someone who isn’t yet strong enough to fight a strong-willed person, then use them.”

“Most of the other rules make sense, too. It’s just the dog thing I don’t get. I understand why we can’t have cats,” Millie said.

“I’d rather have a cat than a fucking dog,” Chad said.

“I don’t want to have to listen to someone else’s fucking animal making noise. I sure don’t want to have to smell their shit or have them running through the halls,” Jan said.

“What about Mary and Judy? They have Mikey, what’s the difference?” Millie asked.

“Oh, I don’t know, that he’s a human baby,” Jan laughed in disbelief.

“I’d love to live here,” Tammy said. They all laughed at her and she smiled and shrugged. She’d love to be able to get off the campus and away from everyone she had to put on a show for. She really loved her parents; they were great people and they could handle a “Tomboy,” but she wasn’t sure they could handle having a big butch dyke for a daughter. They were liberal and voted for gay rights, but there was a big difference between wanting everyone to being treated equally and realizing that you need gay rights to be in effect because your kid is queer. After what Adrian had said she began to wonder if maybe she didn’t just look like what Francis said she was, a lesbian poster child. She had long, dirty-blond hair, and she guessed she had thought that alone was a good enough cover, but she never wore makeup and what were her cousins' always saying? “If you don’t start wearing makeup and jewelry and dress in something besides jeans and sweat shirts people are going to think you’re a lesbian.”

            She thought about what she was wearing now, tight jeans and a long-sleeved gray jersey style T, no ear rings, and her hair was pulled back in a half-assed braid. It was true that she was now sitting in the “gay” section of town but this was what she’d worn to classes today.

            “You still with us?” Jan asked.

            “Ah… yeah, sorry just thinking maybe I need to change the way I dress if I’m serious about staying in the closet at school and at home.”

            “Because of what Adrian said?” Millie asked. Tammy nodded Millie laughed. “Let me tell you something else Adrian once told me. People who don’t want to know won’t unless they see you eating pussy or you jump in their face and tell them. Some people want to be in denial.”

            “Most people will guess that you are or they’ll wonder and they either won’t care or they’ll steer clear of you because of it, but unless you run for public office it isn’t likely to come out in any way that will be believable – in any way that it isn’t just your word against theirs,” Jerry said. “My parents still think I’m straight in spite of the fact that Chad spends Thanksgiving with my family and they know he’s my “roommate.” They choose to live in denial, and I see no reason to shatter their little world by telling them the truth.”

            “Because you shouldn’t have to lie about who you are to have your parents love or acceptance,” Jan said in a disapproving tone she looked at Tammy. “I don’t know if you’re a bunch of chicken shits or if you’re braver than I am because I just found the closet stifling and being in it… well I think that’s how I wound up in the sanitarium damn near dead.”

            “What happened?” Tammy asked.

            “Oh honey I’m just a huge gay clich�.” She held out her arms exposing the jagged scars ran up her arms from her wrists to almost her elbows. “I tried to kill myself. My parents freaked out and had me committed. While I’m in there these therapists are trying to shrink my head and they’ve got me on all these drugs and all I can hear is ya ya ya from these guys. You know, like when grown ups are talking in a Charlie Brown cartoon. And then there was this day when everything was silent, and I just looked at this poor psychiatrist who’d been working on trying to get me to open up for two months and I said, “I’m queer.” He looked right at me, smiled and said, “So am I, honey, it’s certainly no reason to kill yourself.” She laughed and realizing that they could they all did.

            “Long story short I got better and four years ago Dr. Parker walks me to the door, opens it, hands me a business card for Rhonda’s and sends me on my way. Two years after that I finally made it here and it saved my life.”

            “Rhonda’s, why Rhonda’s?” Tammy asked.

            “Because of Stella,” Jan said. “Stella has helped a lot of people get their lives in order or keep them out of trouble in the first place by giving us a good place to hang out. People to be around that aren’t drugged-out, self-destroying idiots. I doubt either Faye or I would even be alive now if it wasn’t for Stella, and God only knows what would have happened to Adrian. She just showed up on B Street one day with a motorcycle and a tool box.”

            The screaming from Stella’s apartment started up again. “I just wish she could put her own house in order,” Chad said.

            Jan walked across the room and turned up the stereo.

“So there it is,” Faye said, pointing to the livingroom wall. It was dominated by a mural of a medieval castle, and the door they had entered the apartment through had been built to look like the castle doors. The paint treatment on all the other walls made them look like they’d been made from cut stone, and the window treatments had been made from a wood that looked like hand-hewn timbers.

            “Wow,” Francis said with real admiration.

            “Yeah,” Faye said in a far away tone. “When I was a kid well… my childhood was seriously fucked up, the stuff of which nightmares are made. When things got really bad I would think about being locked up in my own castle where no one could get to me. I told just that story to Adrian, no more and no less, and when she’d finished my apartment and I came to check it out this is what I had and… well maybe you’ll think it’s silly, but I always feel safe here.”

            “No, I so get it,” Francis said. “Adrian did these paintings?”

            “I forget you’re new so you don’t know everything about all the B Street crew. Adrian did all of it. She rebuilt this entire building from a pit into what you see today in about two and a half years with a little help from Marcella. The murals were the easy part; she tore out walls, built new ones, rebuilt staircases, replaced all the windows, and on and on and on. You want some wine… I mean I know you’re underage, and I’m not trying to get you drunk, but…”

            “I’d love some wine,” Francis said with a smile, thinking that Faye looked a lot more nervous than she was.

            Faye walked into what she assumed was the kitchen, and Francis took a good long look at the Castle. There was something in the strokes in the feel of it that did make you feel safe and secure and something else it was just a painting of a building but it oozed passion, desire, love.

            She wanted to pick Adrian’s brain, find out what made her tick. Faye reappeared with the wine in long-stemmed glasses and handed one to Francis. Francis took a sip of the red wine. It was good, a merlot she thought, not that she was any wine expert but she’d had merlot before and this tasted the same. When she looked again at Faye, her glass was already empty and sitting on an end table.

            She’s nervous and I’m not and there isn’t something wrong with her there’s something wrong with me. I’ve never been able to tell Tammy or any one else that I don’t want to psychoanalyze people to find out what’s wrong with them but to find out what’s wrong with me. Like maybe by finding out what makes them work I can fix myself.

            “Want to sit down?” Faye asked nervously.

            “Don’t you have a bedroom?” Francis asked. She moved a step closer to Faye and kissed her gently on the lips.

            “Yes,” Faye said shakily, “but my bedroom shares a wall with Stella’s and the screaming… well it’s a bit of a turn off.”

            Francis nodded, set her own glass down, moved up to the older woman and wrapped her arms around her neck. Faye wrapped her arms around Francis’ waist and pulled her tightly against her, she was surprisingly strong and her kiss… well Francis decided right then that people her own age were a waste of time. Faye’s kiss was filled with passion and as her tongue probed Francis’s mouth Francis’s own desire was awakened. Faye’s left hand was up her shirt and caressing her right breast through her bra as her right hand pulled her ever tighter.  Francis pulled her mouth away from Faye’s, “too much clothes,” she breathed huskily. And then they just seemed to be in a race to see who could get naked the fastest. Francis won – barely. And then Faye was lying on top of her on the couch, sliding her body over Francis again and again till France’s skin was humming. Faye put one of her breasts in Francis’s face, and she was only to happy to suck on Faye’s hard nipple till Faye was near screaming and her whole body was arching. She pulled away from Francis then moved to take Francis’ nipple in her mouth and she was sucking it hard and then her fingers found Francis’ clit and she was stroking it with gentle expertise.

            Francis was already coming hard when Faye brought the toys into play.

Adrian couldn’t stand the screaming, it was as simple as that. She wanted desperately to kick Toni’s ass and take her woman anyway, so the screaming didn’t help.

Adrian had grown up in a house where screaming was usually followed by her father ordering her into the room where he was arguing with her mother so that he could beat the living crap out of Adrian in front of her mother. The twisted bastard knew that the best way to punish a woman is to hurt her kids. Oh, he wouldn’t come right out and say he’d brought her in there to be his whipping boy. No, he’d call her in there to clean up the mess he’d made throwing his fit because when he got mad he liked to break things. Not too surprisingly the brutal, manipulative bastard never broke his own things. She’d be cleaning up the mess he’d made, he’d accuse her of going too slow or doing a bad job or cringing, and then he’d beat the living crap out of her.

            So Adrian didn’t like screaming. She especially didn’t like to hear anyone scream at Stella, but it was Toni, and Stella loved Toni. She didn’t love Adrian, and so Adrian had to walk away when her every instinct was to get her key walk in the apartment and kick Toni’s worthless screaming ass.

            It wasn’t right. Stella deserved someone who would treat her like a queen not that flaming fucking bitch.

            They’d been so close once. She’d been so close to getting Stella to leave Toni. Adrian had gotten just enough of Stella to know she wanted more, and now she was never going to get what she wanted.

            Adrian shook her head and put it out of her mind. She pulled the shirt she’d thrown over the wife beater closed and walked into Changes. It wasn’t the sleaziest bar on the strip, but it wasn’t the nicest, either. It was a hook-up bar and everyone knew it. She wasn’t there long enough to drink her second beer when she’d walked out with Connie, a girl she’d hooked up with before that she liked and who understood that Adrian didn’t want to play house with her. They went back to Connie’s apartment where they fucked till there was no blood left in Adrian’s brain. Then she couldn’t think about anything but getting up, walking home, getting a shower, and going to bed – which is what she’d wanted in the first place.

Adrian walked into the kitchen at Rhonda’s showered and in clean clothes. Jan was already cooking, so Adrian knew she had been right that she needed to come in. Stella usually cooked and Jan helped her in the mornings. When Toni was in, Jan often had to start cooking and Adrian helped her.

            They worked silently for a few minutes, then Jan asked, “So, did you get lucky?”

            “Connie,” Adrian said with a smile.

            “Doesn’t that break your two screw rule?”

            “Connie is as big a player as I am. Neither of us is looking for a permanent hook up.”

            “At least not with each other,” Jan mumbled.

            “Let it go, Jan,” Adrian said in a warning tone.

            Jan nodded. “I really like that new girl Tammy. Good people. Likes to play basketball. I told her we liked to get a game together every once in awhile, and she said to count her in.”

            “Cool. I took an instant liking to her. As Stella would say, she feels like good people. And the fem… well I wanted to fuck her so bad I could taste her till I found out she was a bisexual. That just ruined my whole day.”

            “Yeah,” Jan agreed. “Faye of course had to get horizontal with her.”

            “Damn, I was afraid of that. Sorry Jan,” Adrian said, getting down the oats and handing them to Jan. “Just what Faye needs to fall for a God damned bisexual. The girl seems nice and definitely not bad on the eyes, but she’s too young to really know what she wants. Which is why she’s a bisexual.”

            Jan nodded her agreement. “It would be nice if just once Faye could actually become involved with someone who actually wanted her for more than a quick lay.”

            “But some huge dumbass I know fucked that up and doesn’t have the balls to actually try to fix it,” Adrian said.

            “I did try… and I’ll tell you what, Adrian, when you grow a set then you can come and give me shit about what I do.” Jan smiled, tilting her head to the side. “Or don’t do as the case may be.”

            Adrian laughed and then Stella walked in looking tired and more than a little upset. The two girls fell silent as Stella walked back to her office to put her purse and jacket away then walked right back out, still silent.

            “Stella, you all right?” Jan asked.

            Stella nodded walked over and looked down at what Jan had been doing. “Looks like you’ve got it all under control. Thanks.” Her voice broke, and without a word Adrian took her gently by the arm and started propelling Stella towards her office, closing the door behind them.

            “Oh God, Adrian,” Stella fell into Adrian’s arms sobbing, and Adrian held her patting her back. “What am I going to do?”

            “You know what I think you should do, kick her fucking ass to the curb,” Adrian suggested.

            “I can’t…”

            “Then let me do it.” Adrian pushed her to arm’s length and looked at her, but Stella couldn’t hold her gaze. “You don’t have to put up with this shit, Stella.”

            “You don’t understand. None of you understand. Toni… I love Toni she saved my life. I owe her everything. She’s just having a bad time…”

            “Fuck that, Stella. You know that isn’t true. How many times have I heard you tell people that you didn’t do anything for them that they did it for themselves? Someone else can’t save you; those are your own damn words.”

            “You don’t know what I was like, Adrian…” she shook her head in self disgust.

            “Yes I do, dammit Stella. You told me everything. I know. Is that it, Stella? Is that why you put up with her shit, because you think you deserve it because of what you did in the past? Are you a hypocrite as well as an enabler? How many times have I heard you tell people that they have to let go of what they did in the past if they’re ever going to change their lives, make them better. Is that all just bullshit? Let go of her, Stella, let go of her. We could have a good life together. You know how I feel about you, I...”

            Stella quickly put a finger over Adrian’s lips. “Please don’t say it again, Adrian, please don’t. If you say it I’ll have to deal with it and I can’t. Not right now. I need you, Adrian. I need you, but if you say that again you’re going to have to go because I can’t give you what you want.”

            “Yes you could, Stella, we both know you could,” Adrian said but she didn’t say anything else, just pulled Stella to her and held her while she cried.

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