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Episode 2 On a
Growing up in Piedmont, a conservative upper middle classed suburb of Tammy admitted at least to herself that she was gay before she turned thirteen. Basically as soon as she learned what a lesbian was she knew what she was. By the time they were
applying to Shea City U, Tammy was looking to get out of town to get away from an
ex-girlfriend she was afraid was going to out her to the entire town at any minute. Tammy was more than happy to let her friend flaunt her sexuality while she hung on for dear life to her closet door.
Im telling you its P Street like penis, Tammy insisted.
B like boob, boob,
Tammy laughed at herself. No, not really. See, I told you it was
Tammy pulled her BMW over, took the map from
What? Its less than three blocks from the campus.
Great going! Better be nice to me since your mom and dad cut you off because of your perverse ways. They dont give a shit about my perverse ways. Hell, thats the whole problem. They dont give a shit at all. They didnt cut me off; they never put any money back for me to go to college in the first place because that would have cut into their boat fund. If I didnt kill myself and go without a social life Probably just as well. Your social life is likely as not going to give you a social disease, Tammy said with a laugh. Fuck you, Tammy. I had to get a scholarship or I couldnt go to college at all, you know that. She made a face.
Cheer up. Were about to be in queer town, Tammy said, then
punched You ever been before? Nope. If I had been I think I could have found it. You? No, no car remember? I basically havent been anywhere you havent been if it takes a car because my parents sure never took me anywhere. They were always off in one of their cars and God forbid that they should get me one. Bitterness crept into her voice again. Gee, I wonder why you wanted to major in psychology. Shut up, she who waltzes with big orange ball. You have a fucking trust fund, so what would you know about being broke? Youre like the poster child for butch dykes, and yet your parents believe that youre straight. Even if they knew theyd probably be disappointed but theyd get over it quick and they wouldnt pass judgment because theyre good people and they actually love you. So what the hell would you know about parental rejection?
Would you stop with the whining, Lets see, four coffee shops, two gay book stores, and three bars in one city block with names like Hook Ups, Changes and The Closet Door. Id say were home. They couldnt get in any of the clubs because they were under aged and they got carded everywhere they went. They were bitching loudly as they walked down the road. So where the fuck
are you supposed to go when youre under twenty-one and gay? I fucking told you
we needed to have some fake IDs made, but no
you said it wasnt necessary that no one was going to card us on A good looking red headed woman walking up the street heard them, stopped and said, Head over to Rhondas Caf�. It only serves beer so you dont need ID to get in there. Thanks, Tammy said.
Youll like it. She smiled at
Thanks, Its just across the street at the end of this block, the red head pointed in the direction. Freshmen?
Yeah, howd you know? The girl smiled. Its that time of year. Ill see you around Im sure. She walked away. Tammy laughed as they started walking in the direction of the caf�.
What? Is it the perfume you wear or just a pheromone you excrete that lets everyone know youre in heat?
Jealous much?
Rhondas wasnt hard to find the sign hanging from a post about
fifteen feet above the sidewalk was bright yellow with black letters. In big letters it
said Rhondas Caf�, under that in smaller letters it said Food,
Beer, Entertainment, and then in slightly bigger letters along the bottom it read,
If you dont like the rules go away!
Apparently most people didnt mind the rules, the place was packed, noisy, and
full of life. Just outside the front door was a four by four foot sign. at the top in big letters it said, The Rules: 1. NO DRUGS! 2. No smoking! 3. You break it; you bought it. 4. No Chicken Hawks. 5. No one under sixteen. 6. To drink beer you must have ID. 7. If you give beer to a minor or drugs to anyone the cops are on speed dial. 8. No fighting. 9. NO DYKE DRAMA!!! If you break the rules you will be banned from Rhondas for life. Have a good time. So you want a coke or something? Tammy asked in her ear so that she could be heard over the noise.
I suppose. Theres no sense even trying to get anything stronger, They walked up to the bar and found the bartender working on one side while women hung all over the bar in front of her as if they all expected a genie to pop out of her ass at any moment. Francis didnt have to wonder why, the woman had a smile that would melt the coldest heart and was so charismatic you didnt have to see her to feel her presence.
Thanks, The woman just smiled and said, Welcome to Rhondas, in a voice that said she really was glad they were here.
We could be sent off to the presidents stupid-assed war, but we
cant even walk up to the bar, Tammy mumbled as she started propelling Theres a $1.00 cover charge, she said. Only a buck? Tammy said in disbelief. Its just to pay the entertainer. When we dont have entertainment there is no cover charge, the waitress said. Ill have a
coffee. What do you want, Coke. You want anything else? Were still serving from our munchies menu if youd like to see that. Actually I am a little hungry, Tammy said.
Youre always hungry, Yeah, and whatever I order you know youre going to eat half, so shut up. The waitress handed her a small menu and she ordered some nachos. As the waitress walked
away
The waitress came back in seconds with their drinks. Tammy saw where
Im just looking, Tammy laughed. They shared a plate of nachos, and as the night wore on they started to relax. They danced a lot and flirted a little. They were having a great time, and everything was cool till some huge, fat, bull dyke thought that Tammy was trying to run off with her girl friend which she had been, but in all fairness the girl hadnt been acting like she was with any one. Besides, since as Frances had observed on many occasions Tammy had no game whatsoever, the womans girlfriend had been the one doing most of the talking. Hey, get off my girl friend, she said, grabbing Tammy by the collar of her T-shirt and throwing her half way across the now fairly empty caf�.
I aint got no problem with you, its with your friend and I will kick your
stupid fat ass, Tammy said, and then Then
Get out. You and your woman get out, she said in a deceptively calm
voice. You came in here drunk. Youre nothing but a fucking troublemaker, Deadra. So you and Jenny get the fuck out and dont come back. You cant throw me out of Rhondas; you dont own it.
But I do, the black woman who had talked to Tammy and Frances earlier
said walking up to Adrians right shoulder. So I suggest you get out before I
have The woman helped her girlfriend up and then they both left. The black woman turned to Frances and Tammy. Sorry about that. I could have taken care of her myself, Tammy said.
Oh I dont doubt it, but we dont allow fighting here, and
its Adrians job to handle the dyke drama, not our customers. My name is
Stella. I own Rhondas. She must have read the confused look in Frances
eyes because she laughed and said, It was named after the former owners
girlfriend. They broke up and she sold the business. It already had a good clientele,
so
if it aint broke dont fix it isnt that what you always
say, Well not always, but I say it a lot. she smiled at them both and then went back behind the bar where she started washing her hands.
Tammy Willis. Tammy shook the womans hand. Im sorry; I swear I wasnt trying to cause any trouble. You dont have to with Deadra, we had her on the three-strikes-youre-out list; we were looking for a reason to ban her, Stella said.
Last call,
So I guess youre the first of the freshmen this year. There ought to be
some sort of award for that. What about one more round of drinks, on the house? Stella started walking away then turned and whispered in Frances direction. You can talk to her; she doesnt bite. At least she doesnt bite on a first date, or so Ive been told.
Im going home and writing this down on the calendar. I dont think Ive ever seen you embarrassed before. She shoved Frances shoulder towards the bar. Go on. You dont get it, Tammy. I find her unbelievably attractive but Id rather know what her story is. You arent a shrink yet, Tammy said with a disgusted tone as she went back to their table.
It means you dont always need to know what makes everyone tick. You dont always have the right to ask some of the questions you ask, Tammy said. The same waitress that had been serving them all night brought over a coffee and a coke. Ive drank so much coffee tonight Im never going to sleep. So thats it. Youre just going to assassinate my character and then change the subject to jonesing on caffeine. Assassinate your now what the hell are you talking about? Do you think you might try speaking my language? So does that mean cave-man type grunts? Why are you pissed off at me? Me why are you pissed off at me?
Wow dudes!
Look, Frances, its Muhammad, Tammy said, proving that she
wasnt as stupid as she liked everyone to think she was.
Muhammad?
Dont pay any attention to her, Thanks for bouncing the Dyke from hell, Tammy said, though it was obvious from her tone of voice that she would have rather handled it herself.
There were a million questions You close out the bar? Stella screamed from the back.
Mostly, moneys in the safe,
Im sorry, You arent stopping us from closing. She released Francess hand. Where you guys from?
So you basically just moved across town. You living at home or here?
In the dorms, Tammy said. She could have pledged to a sorority but
decided against it because
Cant beat me for trying.
Stella sat down then. Getting too old for these late nights, so you girls
will have to come back and, she smiled at Well be back, Tammy said. In the car on the drive home Tammy was too quiet, especially since shed drank enough coffee to wake a dead body. Of course Frances had drank just as much coke, so maybe Tammy wasnt talking because Frances wouldnt shut up which was actually common for their friendship and had little to do with how much caffeine shed drank. Rhondas is just the greatest place on earth. Dont you think its the greatest place on earth? I mean aside from the fact you nearly got your ass kicked. I did not nearly get my ass kicked, Tammy said, then fell silent again. I suppose not. Fat, sloppy, drunk, bitch I probably could have taken her and whats wrong? Nothing, Tammy shrugged in that way that she always did when she was hiding something. Are you still mad at me? No. Then whats wrong, why are you so quiet, what are you thinking?
Dammit Not from your best friend. Youre my best friend, not my girlfriend.
That should make it easier to tell me anything, Tammy let out a sound that was like steam escaping from a pressure cooker then she said, If you make fun of me Im going to smack you. Fair enough.
When Deja vu. Yeah that. It was weird I just knew Id done it before, and when I looked at her it was like I was looking at a friend, someone Id always known not someone Id just met.
Tammy sighed, Go ahead and laugh.
Im not going to laugh at you, Tammy. I just dont know what to
say. Tammy still looked bothered. There something else? Rule ten, Tammy said.
Yeah, I dont get it. What kind of weirdo pisses or worse shits in the
floor or even on the can with the door open? Tammy said, making a disgusted face.
The it isnt shit, dumb ass, its sex. Oh, Tammy said as the light dawned, then added angrily. See, I knew you were going to make fun of me.
Stella watched as Jan and Toni was gone more and more, and when she was home she was such a bitch that Stella often wished shed just stay gone. Toni was going through menopause and very dissatisfied with where her life was and all the places it didnt seem to be going, and she seemed to think that everything that was wrong with her life was Stellas fault. When she was gone Stella missed her and when she was here Stella just wanted her gone again.
Something had to give. She owed Toni a lot and theyd been through a lot
together, but every time she talked to Toni every time she saw her she just felt more and
more like it was over. If it was over
maybe she should have gone with She shook the thought from her head as she turned the key in the lock on her door. She did love Toni; they did have a life together well almost.
She locked the door behind her then walked over and dropped her purse and her keys
on the bar by her phone. She looked at the phone and started to call Toni, trying to
remember what time it was in Of course once she actually thought about it she started to remember; that gave life to the fantasy and it just sort of took over. So she took her fantasy and a water proof vibrator and went to get a long, hot bath.
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