Hello, world, I want to share with you my thoughts on being happy, staying happy and achieving happiness.

I always think it is a shame that we realise how happy or fortunate we are only when we have someone worse placed than ourselves to compare with.

For example, I often hear people use this cliche or a version of it: I used to complain about my ill-fitting shoes until I met a man with no feet.

Why should it be like this? Why can't we just realise how fortunate we are without having someone truly unfortunate to compare with.

Thus with this in mind, I went to baby-sit my father today, Jan 9, 2000, a Sunday, so that his Indonesian maid could have her monthly break.

Well, I could have sulked about it because if truth be told none of us children love father.

We feel a duty towards him, perhaps some guilt, because we don't feel naturally close to him. It doesn't make the guilt less bad even when we realise that he did sweet nothing to cultivate closeness with his kids when we were young. But that's another story.

The current story is that I made my father-sitting pass pleasantly enough by reflecting on how fortunate I am -- especially me and those of us from my father's second and third wives. We are over, or knocking on, 50 and yet all of us have both parents still with us.

The first wife's children are without their mother and have done without her since her death in March 1989.

Hence, I'm more blessed than my four half-brothers in this respect, because just as my sister and I treasure our mum, I'm sure the four boys treasured theirs.

As for the other three half-brothers --the children of dad's third wife -- they are equally blessed in having both parents alive. But then, their mum is young, exactly 12 years older than me and they are all under 50.

When they turn 50 and more, will they have both parents around them like my sister and me now, even though we have already entered our sixth decade?

Perhaps not. Dad is already into his 80s and well, not in the best of health, at least mentally. It may be all too soon when some of my siblings will be orphans and the rest of us will join the middle-aged who can at best boast of just one living parent.

Still, compared to other families, me and my siblings are really fortunate. All except me have married and all those who married are still with their original partners, not an easy feat, given today's high divorce rates.

Ruminating thus, the time with father went by pleasantly enough. It was helped definitely by the fact that my sister joined me in the chore.

And I made it pass even faster when I persuaded father, after lunch, to go for a ride to the nursing home where my mum's elderly sister, whom we call Pi-pi, is staying.

Perhaps father was persuaded because he knew my mother, with whom he has been estranged for over 40 years now, will also be there. Mum had elected to visit her sister rather than join us in father-sitting.

POSTSCRIPT
Since this was written, Pi-pi has gone to heaven. She died on Oct 16, 2000, half-way through her 85th year. There was no weeping or gnashing of teeth. Just a dignified service with two Methodist pastors, masses of flowers and 29 friends and relatives to bid her a last farewell.