| RELATIONSHIPS (cont'd) |
| A few months go by and you begin to get restless. What was new and exciting is now predictable and commonplace. She�s starting to make noises about a permanent commitment. She becomes angry when you evade the subject. Why is she doing this? Things are fine the way they are. Why is she pushing? All you said was that you loved her. Why is she trying to hold you to some kind of lifetime contract? Later has come. It�s time to look elsewhere. And so you do. While still continuing to see her and pretend everything�s fine. After all, it�s not your fault the relationship has turned sour. She�s the one who changed, not you. Why should you do without �it� because of her attitude? Finally the inevitable happens. You�ve met someone else. And so, you sit down with your lady and have �the talk.� Not because you know the relationship has hit a dead end and are concerned that she�s waiting for something you can�t give her, but to free up your own time for that new lady waiting in the wings. You know what to say. You�ve said it so many times before. �My feelings for you have changed. It�s not you, it�s me. When I said I loved you, I meant it at the time.� (Sure you did.) You know she�ll cry. Let her cry. You�ll only have to face it this evening. After tonight you�ll never have to see her again. You�ll apologize for hurting her and wish her happiness. Then you�ll leave, and it will be like you fell off the face of the earth. She�ll try to telephone you and you�ll duck her calls. You'll delete her emails. She�ll become hysterical and force a confrontation. You�ll get angry. You're not going together anymore! It�s over! Why is she still hanging on? Finally, disgusted with her attitude, you recite a laundry list of everything she did wrong while you were seeing each other. Small wonder your feelings for her changed. What did she expect? Do you recognize yourself in this scenario? If so, how can you live with yourself? Do you think it's funny? A big joke? That lady you were playing with, that lady who is now crying over you, is a human being with feelings, not some piece of furniture you had on layaway, some inanimate object you took out of circulation while you decided whether or not you wanted it. What is wrong with you? Are you so desperate for sex that you�ll say and do anything to get it? And now for you women out there. Yeah, you! Did you think you were getting off scot free? Women aren't above a bit of manipulation. A woman meets a guy and figures, hey, it�s not true love, but it�ll do until the real thing comes along. Why should she stay home alone? He takes her places, buys her dinner, buys her gifts. He�s good in bed. Why shouldn�t she keep seeing him until she meets Mr. Right? |