We always seem to want those things we don't have. Moreover, we
are often convinced that if we had those things we want so
badly, we would finally be happy.
Singles who want to be in a relationship often believe once
they are in one they will finally be happy. Those in shaky
relationships hope their relationship will work out, because
having worked it out will finally make them happy.
"I will be happy when I am in love." "I will be happy when
he/she does really loves me." "I will be happy when I know he
or she is committed to me." "I will be happy when my
husband/wife is more considerate." Sound familiar?
The truth is that happiness is an attitude. It's not something
created by outside circumstances, but instead is completely
within your control. This means that you can be happy
regardless of whether you are in a relationship or not. You can
be happy regardless of whether your relationship is working out
or not. If fact, if you cultivate happiness, your relationship
will improve.
You will not get that deep sense of satisfaction and happiness
you crave just by getting or improving a relationship. Nothing
will give you that sense of happiness, unless you cultivate it
consciously.
Is the glass half empty or half full? Life and relationships
work better when the glass is half full. Below are some simple
yet specific steps you can take to cultivate happiness and see
the glass half full, regardless of your relationship status.
1. Be grateful
Create a sense of gratitude for what you have, for what is
working, for what is wonderful and sweet in your life. A
morning or evening gratitude list, written each day, can do
wonders for helping you feel grateful.
2. Take care of yourself
Identify the small things in life that make you feel good, and
do one daily. A short walk, a few minutes of writing in your
journal, a short meditation, watching the sunset. Whatever
reminds you that you are a human being and not a human doing
will improve your outlook on life.
3. Be creative
Creativity and self-expression generate happiness. Schedule
some creative time each day, even if it's just a few minutes of
writing, painting, sculpting, etc.
4. Move
Moving our bodies generates feel-good hormones called
endorphins. Move a little every day to stay happy.
5. Get someone to take care of you
It feels good to be taken care of, even in small ways. Get a
massage, a manicure, someone to carry your groceries, launder
your clothes, or fix something for you.
6. Read inspirational material
It helps to be reminded of positive thoughts and positive
attitudes. Get a small book of positive, inspirational thoughts
and keep it by your desk. Read one or two thoughts each day.
7. Contribute
Stand up for something that matters to you. Contributing,
making a difference feels good. It boosts your self-esteem,
your gratitude and feeling of well being.
8. Get some time
I know this one is hard, especially if you are a single parent.
But if you are determined, you can find some time every day to
just be. Make sure you do this - it will make a big difference
in your ability to be happy.
9. Be in nature
Nature rejuvenates and restores the human spirit. Whether your
brand of nature is mountains or the ocean, give yourself the
gift of visiting it frequently.
10. Be happy
No matter how many wonderful things you do to create a
positive, happy, satisfied life, you could still end up unhappy.
Ultimately, happiness, gratitude, a feeling of satisfaction is a
choice. People often do not choose happiness. Many feel
refusing to be happy will somehow get them what whey want, like
a child holding his breath. Holding your breath will not get
your what you want. It is happiness that attracts.
Love and relationships
- Love Under Fire
In life there are two viewpoints we can have about ourselves..
- Is it Romantic Armageddon, or just Uncomfortable Shoes?
13 Warning Signs You're About To Get Dumped!
- Is she "the one"?
How do you know that odd little feeling that appears whenever you see her isn't just infatuation - how can you tell if she's the one?
- Winning & Losing
These things are the goal and reality of a healthy marriage.
- Conflict Resolution
Conflict by nature is difficult. And yet conflict is a normal, natural aspect of any relationship.
- Rebound Effect
Let's observe this dynamic in action by looking at a love relationship in progress.
- Adding Spice To Your Relationship
Is your relationship in a rut or getting stale? Need something to spice it up?
- Addicted-To-Foreplay
Here's a game you can MAKE yourself. It's nothing fancy, but it is fun. Rated a *10* by players at Addicted-to-Romance.
- Fanning the Fire
Good sex and games alone aren't enough to make a happy marriage last
- Ask Right and You May Receive
There are tricks to getting what you ask for in any relationship. And wonderfully, these tricks are the opposite of manipulation
- Cultivating Happiness
The truth is that happiness is an attitude. It's not something created by outside circumstances, but instead is completely within your control.