Tainted Memories of Issey Miyake // 22

The day had been long and arduous, and it was too obvious it was a Monday. Still unaccustomed to the crutches, I limped and dragged my body out of the school building. HeeJoo trailed behind me with my backpack. I stopped at the foot of the stairs leading towards the school grounds. Although it was me that was on crutches, it seemed to take HeeJoo two steps for my every one step. I guess I was just used to speed walking.

“BoHyung, I think HoHyung wants you.”

HoHyung? Wants to speak to me at school? I don’t think so.

“Hurry HeeJoo, RUN!”

I began to push myself off my crutches in order to take wider steps. Nearby kids watched me like the local circus act. I’m sure if I saw someone else doing it I would stand there and laugh. Too bad it was me they were laughing at.

“BoHyung! Wait up!”

“Hurry up HeeJoo! I can’t get caught talking to—“

“Noona.”

That stale, greasy, thick voice. The firm grip on my shoulder that only got tighter. The towering shadow covering all my comforting sunlight. It could only be…SuhHoHyung. No one at school knew of our relationship, excluding HeeJoo of course. I came too far to let my cover be blown. Who wants to be known as the older sister of the school gangster?!

“HeeJoo noona, what’s wrong with this hippo?”

Hippo?! Who me?! He’s probably not talking to me.

“Hey hippo, why are you running away from your beloved younger brother?”

So he was talking to me.

”Why am I a hippo?! Let me go! People are going to suspect something!”

I carefully looked over my shoulder, only to unluckily meet eyes with the famous “overwhelmed sextuplets.” The overwhelmed sextuplets all stared at me with warning glares that demanded I get away from the oh too famous, SuhHoHyung.

The overwhelmed sextuplets. Six of the most popular girls in JoongAng. Known to have looks very slightly above average, popularity, outspokenness, and the reason for their clan name, stalker tendencies. The overwhelmed sextuplets would stalk any guy that was remotely good looking. Once the overwhelmed sextuplets called dibs, all the girls of JoongAng stayed 5 feet away from the claimed guy. That is unless; the guy clearly rejected all six of the sextuplets and took the initiative to chase another girl. Most of the good looking guys either dated one of the sextuplets or were just uninterested in girls period. So it was the unwritten law. If a overwhelmed sextuplet selected a guy, he was off limits. JoongAng girls were not allowed to make the first move on a selected guy.

This school was definitely ran by monkeys.

“Don’t worry hippo, I don’t want to be seen near you either. Just tell mom I walked you home, and then went out with some friends. Tell her I’ll be home early.”

This meant he would be home around 2AM instead of 4AM.

“I’m not lying to mom just to save your as.s.”

There was no way I was going to help HoHyung! Not over my dead body! I will not lessen myself in order to save the as.s of the fu.cker called my brother! No sir! Not today, not tomorrow, not—

“HeeJoo noona, you’re going to take this hippo home right? Will you tell my mom I’ll be home later?”

NO HEEJOO! You can’t—

“Okay.”

Is God out there to make my life a living hell? Why does he surround me with such people? Why God, why?!

God was obviously too busy answering everyone’s prayers, except mine. He had to add on to the local monkeys by bringing along the king of the jungle, AnChilHyun. The biggest ape of them all.

“HoHyung, how do you know BoHyung and HeeJoo?”

“Oh HeeJoo noona I’ve known forever, as for the ugly thing next to her, I have no clue.”

Knowing my temper, HeeJoo looked nervously at AnChilHyun and HoHyung. If anyone knew me, it was BaekHeeJoo. My dear friend!

“Come on BoHyung, we’ve got loads of English homework.”

English homework? That would mean I need my English book. Which I stupidly left in my desk. How would the world turn without HeeJoo? I started to head back towards the school.

“HeeJoo, I’ll be right back! I have to get my English book.”

I could hear AnChilHyun saying something to HeeJoo. Telling by HeeJoo’s reply, she had rejected the pri.ck for me! Score!

“You go with HoHyung, I have to wait for BoHyung. I’ll call you later Hyunnie.”

It was too bad I couldn’t hear the rest of the conversation. The insulting comments of the nearby overwhelmed sextuplets tickled my ear as I passed by.

“Who does she think she is?”

SuhBoHyung, that’s who I am!

“She should be thankful someone like HoHyung touched her.”

He touches me all the time, to beat on me that is, and I’m not thankful at all!

“Don’t worry, HoHyung is way too good-looking to even consider someone like her.”

He looks like a fuc.king cockroach!

The shrilly voices of the overwhelmed sextuplets began to disappear as I got further and further into the almost silent stairways. It was quite scary how quickly the students of JoongAng disappeared from school. I think by the time the clock reached 3:05, the school building would always be almost completely empty.

I pulled out my English Composition book and shut locker twenty six. Learn to Speak American! Volume 6. For some reason, the title of the English book just didn’t sound right. Wasn’t it supposed to be Learn to Speak English? I’m probably wrong. It’s at volume 6 already! If it was incorrect someone would have already fixed it.

Stepping outside into the comforting sun, I peered around searching for HeeJoo. Unfortunately HeeJoo was no where to be seen. She wasn’t the type that would just leave me. Taking a guess that she went to the bathroom, I sat along the ridge of a small flower garden. I began to shut my eyes in order to fully take in the warmth of the sun, but quickly looked over at two under classmen chattering away about a girl.

“She’s the hottest girl at SaeJong! Did you see who she was with? That girl is one of the dorkiest girls at our school! They’re so da.mn different!”

…it couldn’t be.

I leaped off the cement ledge and hobbled over towards the two guys. I began to wave my crutches in their direction.

”Hey where did those two girls go?! Where did the sailor moon girl go with HeeJoo?!”

“Sailor moon girl?”

“The SaeJong girl! Where did she take HeeJoo?!”

Both boys took a few steps back before one of them finally spoke up.

“I think they were going towards the back alley.”

Hold on HeeJoo! I’m coming!
 

Tainted Memories of Issey Miyake // 23

We only ran for about five minutes, but for some odd reason it felt like we had been running for hours. Stupidly, I didn’t once try to free myself from KimJaeJoong’s grasp, but continued to follow from behind.

KimJaeJoong pulled me, and we ran through the gates of JoongAng High School. Why were we headed inside the school when everyone else was trying to leave it? Students watched as KimJaeJoong and I whizzed by.

Please stop looking at me kids. I don’t know what’s going on either.

For some reason we weren’t headed inside of the school buildings, but instead headed towards the back. I felt my body being dragged into a surrounding area that was significantly darker than the open field in the front of the school. The familiar alley pricked at my closed memories of the proverbial area. A bad memory.

We finally came to a complete stop, and I stood bent over on my knees, huffing and puffing for air. I definitely needed to start working out more often. How could I be so out of air after a mere five minute run?!

I glanced over at KimJaeJoong, who was looking behind a tattered box at the edge of the left hand side building. He seemed perfectly fine, and completely unaware of the fact that we just ran about half a mile. It was as if we had just strolled over! There was no discoloration in his face, or change in breathing patterns! It was just me spazzing out! All by myself!

Oh my God! SuhBoHyung, get some da.mn exercise!

“I bet you never run in your life huh. You probably haven’t even lifted anything heavier than five pounds huh.”

I did too run! I used to run everyday! In P.E. that is.

“I used to exercise everyday! I’ve just been busy ever since I got into collage and—“

“Running in P.E. doesn’t count.”

HOW DID HE KNOW?!

“It wasn’t P.E.! I exercised outside of school!”

White lies don’t hurt! Especially white lies that somewhat concern your weight.

“Anyways, why did you drag me out of there, and why are we here?”

Score! Quick change in topic is the way to go SuhBoHyung! Don’t give him the chance to make comments on your weight! Lead the topic in other directions! That is the way to nirvana!

The lack of air must have been getting to my head. I looked at JaeJoong still searching for something behind the cardboard box.

“You wanted to get out of there didn’t you?”

I certainly did, but I never asked you to drag me out like some freaking dog! Is there a sign on my back that says “KimJaeJoong’s puppy”?! But I am glad that you dragged me out. Hee.

“But what are we doing here?”

Grabbing something from the ground, KimJaeJoong held out a pack of cigarettes in front of me.

”I left my cigarettes here during lunch, and didn’t want to come get it by myself.”

What the hell?! So you dragged me along with you?!

“You wanted to get out of there right?”

Once again KimJaeJoong left me speechless. What could I possibly say to that question. It was obvious I wanted to get out of that chaotic café. I hated losing to kids! It made me feel so inferior and stupid! Especially losing to last place.

KimJaeJoong pulled out a cigarette and tossed it into his mouth. He began to light it, and I grabbed it and broke it in half.

“Kid’s shouldn’t smoke.”

Ignoring my warning, he once again pulled out another cigarette. This time I didn’t give him the chance to put the cancer stick in his mouth. I grabbed the cigarette with one hand, and grabbed the pack with the other. Throwing the cigarettes on the ground, I stomped on them like a mad woman.

You can’t smoke them if they’re crushed! I win!

“Are you crazy?”

“Smoking is bad for you.”

“So does that mean we’re dating?”

DATING?! How does the subject go from cigarettes to dating?! What does cigarettes being bad for your health have anything to do about us?!

“What in the world are you talking about?!”

KimJaeJoong squatted on the ground as he searched for an unbroken cigarette. I immediately pushed him away and began to jump up and down in the general area of all the squashed cigarettes.

Not a chance KimJaeJoong!

“You like me don’t you.”

NO! I HATE YOU! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!

“Don’t think so highly of yourself KimJaeJoong.”

“Then what do you care if I smoke cigarettes or snort cocaine. What’s it matter to you?”

Because I care for the well being of the entire world!

“You’re the hottest thing on Earth!”

A muffled baby voice repeated the sentence over and over again. KimJaeJoong pulled out a metallic blue cell phone from his pocket. Sliding the screen open and as if it was the most bothersome thing in the world, place it to his ear.

“What.”

Only pri.cks answer their phone like that. No wonder he answers his phone like that.

“Why do you keep calling me? Stop crying! It’s fuc.king annoying! If you don’t stop crying in the next three seconds, I’m hanging up.”

You inconsiderate punk! How can you talk like that to a crying girl!

“I told you why! I like someone else! Her name?”

Please don’t say—

“SuhBoHyung!”

SuhBoHyung…that’s me. Why does it have to be me?

“Yes her name is SuhBoHyung. I’m hanging up. I have to go study.”

LIAR! YOU DON’T STUDY! YOU’RE LAST PLACE! YOU LIAR!

Sliding his phone shut, KimJaeJoong came towards me. I didn’t like the cocky look across his blemish free face. There was something up his sleeve, and I was not going to get caught up in it.

“I have to go tutor YooChunnie. I’ll see you later. Thanks for taking me out of that café.”

“That YooChun?”

I followed pointed finger of KimJaeJoong’s pale finger. With both hands leaning against the wall, YooChun had a girl cornered, and if my eyes weren’t mistaken, they were kissing. Really, really kissing.

What in the world was ParkYooChun doing, shoving his face into some girl’s mouth like that!? He was supposed to be at home waiting for me to come over!

“PARKYOOCHUN!”
 

Tainted Memories of Issey Miyake // 24

Don’t worry HeeJoo! I’m coming! Don’t let the stupid sailor scout push you around! I’ll be right there!

It was too bad my crutches were not willing to cooperate. I quickly threw the crutches into a bush, and promised to come get them later. There was no time to deal with such petty issues. As I got nearer to a side alley on the school grounds, I could hear the icy threats of ChunEeSeul.

It was around 3:30PM. The sun was brightest around this time, yet the alley was pitch dark except the ray of light shining through the crack of the two buildings. I couldn’t make out what ChunEeSeul was saying, but with each step I could feel my goose bumps playfully jumping up and down my arms and legs. I never believed too much in “vibes,” but my deep breaths got shorter, and I could physically feel my surroundings warning my senses.

ChunEeSeul’s shrill voice haunted my eardrums. As EeSeul’s words got clearer, my feet became more and more glued to the ground. Gravity was starting to pull too hard. I couldn’t move.

“Why?! Is this about the fuc.king past BaekHeeJoo?! If it is, just drop it! It’s fuc.king over and done with.”

How in the world could any of it be over and done with? How could anyone possibly drop such a traumatic past? It just wasn’t humanely possible. To have one’s whole life and personality change, and to turn around and completely ignore it? How could ChunEeSeul cause such deep scars and expect them to go disappear like some magic trick. No ChunEeSeul, life is not like that.

“Leave Hyunnie out of this! You can’t possibly think he’s going to fall for it too?! Please BaekHeeJoo, your time is over! No one fu.cking cares!”

ChunEeSeul’s vicious laugh rang throughout the walls of the two towering buildings. I took two steps closer to the voices. About five feet away ChunEeSeul stood condescendingly across from HeeJoo. There was familiarity between the two opposites. When putting the two near each other, it was spooky how different they were. It was like sticking two wrong-sided magnets together, they clashed and pulled away from each other.

“Do you know why Hyunnie is dating you? He pities you! He thinks you’re pathetic!”

“ChunEeSeul…”

HeeJoo’s soft voice quivered. The softness of her voice couldn’t scare a fly. There was no way anyone would fear such shaking fearful voice.

SLAP!

Within a blink of an eye, out of absolutely nowhere, ChunEeSeul slapped HeeJoo. I looked over at ChunEeSeul standing before HeeJoo. There were flames of hate lighting her eyes. Although she wasn’t looking directly at me, I could feel the burning sensation of horror running up and down my spine.

“Don’t you ever…say my name before me.”

“CHUNEESEUL!”

I could no longer stand and watch HeeJoo being abused by such a twisted bit.ch. No one deserved such a thing. Especially not HeeJoo.

I stood next to HeeJoo, and I could spot the single drops of liquid falling down her crimson cheeks. My heart began to break for my helpless HeeJoo. Life was unfair, but it seemed cruelly unfair towards HeeJoo. There was never enough time to cope with all the injustice. You fell, and just as you were beginning to stand, it struck you back down. There was no end.

“Who the fu.ck are you?”

“Why are you laying your dirty hands on my friend?!”

ChunEeSeul’s answer was a sardonic laugh. This girl was crazy. Truly insane.

“BoHyung ah…lets go…let’s just go.”

“BaekHeeJoo! Aren’t you fu.cking pissed?! Aren’t you pissed some stupid bi.tch just hit you for no reason?! I’m not the one that got hit, yet I’m fu.cking mad! Why aren’t you mad?! Are you stupid?! Why do you let people do this to you!”

This must have been a comedy to ChunEeSeul, because she continued to laugh uproariously. Holding onto her stomach, ChunEeSeul leaned against the building wall and continued to hoot out in agony.

“Oh my God! Please stop! My poor stomach! Stop!”

“You…stupid little bit.ch! Shut the fu.ck up before I fuc.king smash that pretty little face of yours into the wall!”

How dare she laugh. To test my limits…to pick at my temper…she would definitely not get away with it.

“What if I don’t? What are you going to do? Do you think I’m scared?! Don’t make me laugh!”

I couldn’t help it any longer. There was no way I was going to let someone get away with hurting HeeJoo. ChunEeSeul, was just like all the other bit.ches at our school. They didn’t care about anyone except themselves. They stepped on whoever got in their way. There was no such thing as morals or humanity. The entire world revolved around themselves. Nothing got in their way, until they hurt HeeJoo, and then I came into the picture.

SLAP!

“How does it feel ChunEeSeul? Hey look, now you and HeeJoo are even!”

“DO YOU WANT TO DIE?!”

“Why don’t you fu.cking try! TRY CHUNEESEUL!”

Once again, I watched as ChunEeSeul’s hand went up into the air. Coming straight at my face, I stood tall, and waited for the painful slap that was soon to come. To my pleasant surprise someone had stopped the expected slap.

“Stop it.”

AhnChilHyun?!

I took back every single secret insult I had thrown at him. Standing against the very minimal glare of light, I looked up at AnChilHyun who stood before the three of us like he was God sent. It was my first time feeling relieved that AnChilHyun had showed up. I really didn’t feel like getting into a brawl with a sprained ankle.

“EeSeul ah, just let it go…”

“AnChilHyun! This has nothing to do with you! Don’t fu.cking get involved! It’s strictly between BaekHeeJoo and me so just stay out of it!”

“Leave HeeJoo alone.”

“Hyunnie yah…why…why…”

ChunEeSeul’s suddenly painful eyes looked deep into AnChilHyun’s. As she stared mindlessly at AnChilHyun, a surprising stream of tears began to fall out. ChunEeSeul was crying. Another trick of hers. Why couldn’t he see it? Why couldn’t he see that the person that was really hurting was HeeJoo.

“EeSeul ah—“

My blood was boiling, my heart was hurting, and my world was falling apart. This was just too unfair.

“ANCHILHYUN! What the fu.ck is wrong with you?! Who is your girlfriend?! Oh you don’t know?! Let me remind you! Her name is BaekHeeJoo! She’s standing right here because this stupid bi.tch hit her! Do you know what HeeJoo did?! She just stood here! Why the fu.ck are you siding with this other girl?! Huh?! What the fu.ck is wrong with you! Do you know what HeeJoo went through?! Do you know what this fu.cking ChunEeSeul put my poor HeeJoo—“

CRASH!

I immediately turned sideways, and saw HeeJoo collapsing to the floor.

“HEEJOO!”

Tainted Memories of Issey Miyake // 25

“ParkYooChun, what the hell were you thnking?! You think you’re some Tom Cruise?! Are you filming your own da.mn love scene?! Are you crazy?! What if you got caught by a teacher?! What if you—“

YooChun grinned playfully and picked up my free hand.

“Noona, do you want a kiss too?”

OH MY GOD! ParkYooChun, screw second to last place. You just be last place! Please God, please control those hormones of his! Please stick him in a human sized condom.

“PARKYOOCHUN! DO YOU WANT TO DIE?!”

A squished bus quieted down and shifted their attentions to the three of us. The only noise that could be heard was the soft song that played in the background.

'Close your eyes...make a wish...and blow out the candlelight..for tonight...'

The background music for my lovely conversation with ParkYooChun just had to be a love song. In order not to give the wrong ideas, I smacked YooChun across the head.

“BRAIN CELLS! NOONA! My brain cells!”

“What brain cells?!”

I was insulting him, yet here was Mr. Genius holding a cheeky grin. What was he laughing about?

YooChun shuffled through his book bag. First he handed me a Calculus book, then a notepad, then a Psychology book, a pencil case, and last but not least, his lunch case. I stood on the bus holding onto ParkYooChun’s life.

“ParkYooChun, I’m your tutor, not your personal book bag!”

A+

Before my wide eyes, was a large red A+. In the right hand corner of the answer sheet, was the name ParkYooChun messily scribbled onto it. Of course you couldn’t miss the larger than life smiley face at the end of his name. ParkYooChun, second to last place, had gotten an A+ on his math test. Mr. Womanizer actually got a grade higher than a D.

“Oh my God! This isn’t a joke right?!”

YooChun nodded eagerly and patted me on the head.

“Don’t pat me!”

Joining in on the celebration, JaeJoong decided to pat me instead.

“STOP PATTING ME!”

As I was yelling at the top of my lungs, KimJaeJoong and ParkYooChun happily conversed with each other, while completely ignoring my angry demand.

“JaeJoong, when my teacher announced that I got the highest grade, even the smart girls looked at me differently! All those really innocent ones that avoid us, even they paid attention! I finally figured it out! In order to get their attention we need to get better grades! I swear to God it works.”

“Serious?!”

Oh dear God, I promise I won’t ask for anything else, just please, please just kill both those idiots.

“TAKE YOUR STUFF!”

I watched in unbelief as YooChun and JaeJoong exited the bus. I rushed out after them still holding onto all of YooChun’s things. Ignoring my struggling self, Dumb and Dumber headed towards YooChun’s apartment.

“LOOK PRETTY GIRL!”

What in the world?!

Both had stopped and turned around. Dumb and Dumber searched around, and looked at me accusingly when a pair of “plump” girls passed by as they fell into a fit of giggles.

Oops?

“ParkYooChun, if you don’t take this stuff right now I’m going to tell your mom about the girl you were kissing! How you sang for her at some café, and how you were fliming your own romance movie!”

Before I could even finish my sentence, YooChun was taking his belongings from me. As he shoved his books back in, YooChun grinned sheepishly.

“This girl is another girl.”

PARKYOOCHUN! WOMANIZER! PLAYER! MAN SLUT!

“SuhBoHyung, your mouth is going to fall off.”

KIMJAEJOONG! PRI.CK! AS.SHOLE! PUNK!

Why me?

Dumb and Dumber left me with my mouth hanging open, and started to walk into YooChun’s apartment complex. After I had finally gathered myself, I rushed into YooChun’s house, only to be greeted by more chaos.

“JaeJoongie hyung! Why did you kidnap my noona!? After you kidnapped BoHyung noona her alien kept on screaming and hitting me! All because you kidnapped my noona! That’s not fair! You didn’t have to put up with NaLi monster!”

“ALIEN?! NALI MONSTER?! KIMJOONSOO! DO YOU WANT TO DIE?! YOU SKINNY SH.IT I’LL KILL YOU!”

JoonSoo’s round eyes squinted shut in fear. His pouty face looked over to NaLi who was hopping up and down in YooChun’s living room.

“Sorry alien, don’t hit me.”

“ALIEN?! KIMJOON—“

What if Mrs. Park walks in?! What in the world is she going to think of me!

“SUHNALI! KIMJOONSOO! GO HOME!”

“NOONA!”

“UNNIE!”

JoonSoo and NaLi both scrambled towards the door. It was like putting two kids with A.D.D. into a tiny room. It was impossible to control! They both needed a leash.

“What you two doing here? I have to tutor YooChun so why don’t you guys go home.”

JaeJoong clicked on the television. YooChun took a seat next to him.

“Why does JaeJoongie hyung get to stay?!”

“Pri.ck sunbae isn’t even related to you! How come you let him stay, but make your own cousin leave?!”

My...head...hurts...a...lot.

“Hey KimJoonSoo, I have a box of ShingShing gum at home. Go get it.”

As soon as JaeJoong finished his sentenced YooChun quickly cut in.

“Hey NaLi, I’ll hook you up with ChangMin.”

Before I could even say anything, NaLi and JoonSoo walked out the door hand in hand. For some reason, I felt completely neglected. Was I supposed to start my period today?

Tainted Memories of Issey Miyake // 27

“Why the hell do I have to tutor you too?! I can’t handle both second to last place, and last place! Do you know how stressful that is?! I sit in class wondering if YooChun is paying attention or trying to woo some girl by writing notes to her on a pencil!”

Life was depressing when you had to tutor Dumb and Dumber.

“It’s not my fault Mrs. Park called the whole neighborhood about YooChun getting an A.”

It had been a long and gruesome day of tutoring. Not only did I have to suffer the two hours with YooChun, but also had to deal with the pressures of having the infamous last place student too. They say that two heads are better than one, too bad the saying didn’t pertain to KimJaeJoong and ParkYooChun.

“I’m going to charge your mom more than I charge everyone else.”

Pat. Pat.

“DON’T PAT ME!”

Pat. Pat.

“KIMJAEJOONG! Stop patting me!”

Pat. Pat.

“STOP IT YOU...rice cooker!”

Rice cooker?! I think my stupidity level drops any time I’m near KimJaeJoong.

Pat. Pat.

My fist went flying at KimJaeJoong’s shoulder, except he stretched out his hand to hold back my head. My arms were too short to reach. The taunting screeches of a six year old SuhHoHyung haunted my mind, ‘My sister has midget arms!’

“Mrs. Park already told my mom how much you charge.”

Swish.

A tiny blob was running up and down, left and right, on the empty sidewalk. Wondering what in the world was following us, I stopped and quickly turned back in hopes I would catch them off guard. There was no one around. Shaking my head in confusion, I turned forward and ran towards KimJaeJoong, who had absolutely no clue that I had stopped.

“Where do you live?”

JaeJoong’s translucent face grinned arrogantly, and although I strictly stated how much I hated it, he bean to pat me on the head.

“Are you going to stalk me?”

What do I need to say or do to make this kid realize that the world doesn’t revolve around him?

Swish.

This time JaeJoong noticed the figure too. We both stopped and turned around. There was definitely someone following us, but who?

JaeJoong scanned the general area. There was absolutely no one on the empty sidewalk. Something must have caught JaeJoong’s attention, because he began to head towards the bright red postal drop box. Clearing his deep voice, he leaned against the mailbox and looked down at a pair of neon pink tennis shoes sticking out. He lightly kicked at the two feet and leaned over the mailbox.

“Oh see yon!”

Oh see yon? What the hell? What the hell is an ‘oh see yon.’

“What’s that?”

Just as I asked someone began to come out from behind the red mailbox. Midget girl!

“You know. Her name is OhShiHyun. Sort of sounds like the English word for ocean. Oh See yon.”

Why try to speak English when your accent sounds like you lost all your teeth?! Why try?!

Midget girl, ShiHyun, opened her already large eyes even bigger, and hooked her tiny arm around JaeJoong’s. There was an unsaid connection between the two, and I couldn’t help but to notice how good they looked together.

“Why are you following me OhShiHyun?”

Of course you think she’s following you.

“I’m not following you oppa! I’m following the whale unnie.”

Whale unnie?! ME?!

“Don’t call my girlfriend a while OhShiHyun! Only I can! I’m going to kick your as.s if I hear you talk about BoHyung like that again.”

I jumped back in surprise. OhShiHyun grabbed her neatly done pigtails and began to crazily rub her head. After a full minute, the midget girl placed her hands on her hips, and stared at JaeJoong and me with hair that seemed to be flying in every direction.

“You like the whale unnie more than your own cousin?! Why oppa?! JoonSoo oppa picked the whale unnie over me, and now even you are! What’s so great about the whale unnie huh?! She doesn’t even have big eyes! I have big eyes, but JoonSoo oppa still likes the whale unnie more!”

If my eyes weren’t playing tricks on me, the midget girl collapsed onto the floor and started to wail. Tears dripped out of her immense eyes. JaeJoong must have felt quite sympathetic, because he knelt down next to the tiny girl and wiped away her tears with the sleeve of his uniform shirt.

They’re related?! Midget girl and pri.ck boy?!

“Don’t cry. Come on, oppa will make you something good to eat, so stop calling BoHyung a whale, only I can. What were you doing following us?”

ShiHyun sniffled up her tears, and looked at me as if she wanted to kill me. Such a small thing, yet so dangerous. I took a few steps back due to the fear of being mauled by midget girl.

“I was following JoonSoo oppa, but he disappeared with whale junior! Then I saw whale senior and—“

“I SAID NOT TO CALL HER WHALE! ONLY I CAN!”

If the two were related, the argument would definitely go on longer than an hour. Both stubborn, and both unwilling to lose, the conversation would go around in an infinite circle. I quickly cut in.

“Lets go JaeJoong. Your mother is probably waiting.”

Grabbing hold of ShiHyun’s hand, JaeJoong let us towards a familiar neighborhood. I blinked a few times as the large print of the word “EeMaeChon” clouded my vision. There were at least ten towering apartments with the local neighborhood name printed on the side.

“You live in EeMaeChon?”

“I thought she was your girlfriend! How come she doesn’t even know where you live?! Oppa you should put your girlfriend in check! I bet you she knows where JoonSoo oppa lives, but then—“

JaeJoong’s large fist lightly crashed down at the top of midget girl’s head. It was the sign for her to shut up, and she obediently did so.

“SuhBoHyung.”

Wasn’t it about time to add the proper phrase of “noona?”

“Noona.”

“SuhBoHyung.”

“Noona.”

“SuhBoHyung.”

“WHAT?!”

I lost. I lost miserably. Pri.ck boy beat me.

“Third window from the left, on the fifth floor. That’s my room. Don’t spy on me when I’m changing.”

I don’t care how much Mrs. Kim was going to pay me, there was no way in hell I was going to tutor KimJaeJoong.
 

Tainted Memories of Issey Miyake // 28

“You have to take him.”

I looked apologetically at the manager of the café. A soft snoring sound floated out of AnChilHyun’s bent over body. Grumbling in annoyance, the manager began to walk away as I furiously shook the sleeping giant.

“AnChilHyun!”

My voice came out scratched from trying not to yell. I sheepishly smiled at the bartender glaring in our direction. It was 3:30 in the morning, and I’m sure everyone wanted to go home, that is, everyone except AnChilHyun, who was sound asleep leaning against the marble table. Desperate times resorted to desperate measures.

I hesitated to press the send button. Staring at the screen for over a minute, I caved in, and began to call the last person I wanted to speak to. Listening fearfully for an answer, I held the phone to my ear almost hoping he wouldn’t pick up.

“Do you want to die?! It’s fuc.king 3:30 in the morning!”

What kind of brother answers his sister’s calls like that? Oh that’s right, a brother named SuhHoHyung does.

Loud noise filtered out of my end. Knowing my younger brother, I was probably on the dot when I guessed that he was sitting at some table drinking his night away with some stupid college girls that couldn’t do any better than a cockroach look alike.

“Well…you know…um…HoHyung ah…um…”

“Do I know you? Oh you don’t know me either? Oh well we’ve got something settled then! Good bye you beast!”

Click.

THE BAST.ARD HUNG UP!

I angrily pressed at the send button again. It was almost four A.M., and I was stuck with a full sized male that wouldn’t budge. Telling by the atmosphere of the workers, I was pretty sure the manager was going to make me clean if I didn’t get out within the next ten minutes.

“I thought we didn’t know each other! Why are you calling me again?!”

“Come to Review.”

“Review?! That sh.it hole?! The one where all the rejects go to?! No way in hell am I going to be seen there!”

I am not a reject!

It was too bad I would have to resort to threats.

“SuhHoHyung, if you don’t hurry the hell up, I will burn your Ladies Bible!”

“I’m right next door. Be there in a minute.”

So he was at the new nightclub next door. I so called it. It was amazing what SuhHoHyung would do for the safety of his Ladies Bible.

Most boys and men carried around black books. A book with names, phone numbers, addresses, and little tid bits about the many women they date. SuhHoHyung on the other hand has a Ladies Bible. Each page is dedicated to a different girl. Pictures are taped on, along with vital information about their lives and personalities. Not to mention specific dates of when he first kissed them, where, how, and if she smelled good or not. When asked why he had such a thing, SuhHoHyung simply replied,

”So I can remember all the lucky ladies that got to experience the joys of SuhHoHyung. That way I’ll remember if they try to get to me a second time. That wouldn’t be fair for the other ladies if I let just one girl enjoy me? Right?”

Is narcism a disease? Can it be treated? Probably not. At least not with SuhHoHyung.

“Who the fu.ck is that?”

SuhHoHyung waved his cell phone towards AnChilHyun’s crumpled body.

“ChilHyun passed out.”

HoHyung pulled up ChilHyun’s head by the collar of his shirt. Looking at him in amusement, HoHyung began to pinch and poke at AnChilHyun’s lifeless face.

“Stop messing around! Lets go!”

“Did you think ChilHyun sunbae would see past the fat lard that you are if he was drunk?”

Why do I have to be related to such a bas.tard?!

I tossed added a gracious amount of tip, and hurried out of my warm seat. Complaining for the whole world to hear, HoHyung exited Review with a knocked out AnChilHyun on his back. Knowing my younger brother, he would soon be demanding some kind of compensation.

“Grab a fu.cking taxi you beast! Do you think I’m having fun carrying an overgrown guy on my back?! Hurry and wave your arm! A taxi driver can’t possibly miss the fat on those arms!”

Did I ever mention that it was SuhHoHyung’s specialty to take out his frustration on me?

Before the taxi even came to a full stop, HoHyung was already opening the door and throwing ChilHyun into the back. Shoving me towards the back door, HoHyung placed himself in the front seat and began to dig through ChilHyun’s wallet.

“Hey mister, can you please just head towards...well...just go to our house.”

To our house?! How is he supposed to know where our house is?!

“Hey kid, how the hell do I know where you live.”

HoHyung glared at the taxi driver like he was the most ignorant being on Earth. It was too bad my bas.tard brother didn’t realize it was he that looked like the idiot, not the taxi driver.

“Samsung apartments...DUH!”

After giving the poor taxi driver a look of unbelief, HoHyung began to dial a few numbers on his blinking cell phone. Who could he possibly be calling at 4 in the morning?

“HeeJoo noona? Where does ChilHyun sunbae live? ... The fat as.s got him drunk or something ... He’s completely passed out ... Don’t worry about it ... Alright ... Thanks noona! Sweet dreams, I’ll see you at school tomorrow!”

TWO FACED PUNK AS.S! Sweet dreams?! Sweet dreams?! You tell me to suffocate in my fat before I sleep, but tell HeeJoo sweet dreams? Bas.tard! DIE!

“Hey mister, can you go to the EeMaeChon apartments? Thank you!”

As always, HoHyung gave the poor man no room to reject or accept. What SuhHoHyung says, goes. Surprisingly, people actually went along with it. Idiots.

I felt something stirring next to me. Freezing up in my seat, I backed into the corner of the seat and the door. AnChilHyun’s head nestled into my lap.

“HeeJoo yah...lets get over this together...I’ll help you...”

It would be the second time that night that AnChilHyun’s soft murmuring would leave me desperately wanting more.
 

Tainted Memories of Issey Miyake // 29

Due to midterms, the college library was packed with students trying to get in some last minute cramming. Of course out of all the students, HwangYuRa and myself were included. It had already been two hours since we settled down, yet we couldn’t seem to get past the first few pages of the section.

”Excuse me, my friends and I were just wonder—“

My temper normally didn’t flare out so much, but today was an exception.

“My friend here isn’t single, nor does she want to give you her number. Go away.”

Glaring at my answer, the guy turned to YuRa. An innocent smile spread across her small face. Nodding eagerly, YuRa quickly answered before the guy could even ask.

“BoHyung is absolutely correct! I’m actually a pedophile! Anyway, we have to hurry hurry, and study study! Bye!”

The completely baffled guy blinked a few times. He turned around and slowly walked away, only to end up in a sprint. YuRa had a very strange sense of humor, that’s why we were such good friends.

“You know, in reality that actually is true. I mean, since you are dating a minor and all.”

YuRa flashed a peace sing, and shook her head in agreement. Just as I was about to ask her where we were, my cell phone began to buzz along the wooden library desk. YuRa’s displeased sigh buzzed in the air, and I quickly apologized with pouty lips before answering.

“Hello?”

“BoHyung ah!”

“EeMo?! (auntie)”

“I need a huge favor darling. Seems like NaRi got into some trouble at school. I’m off on business at least an hour away, so I need you to go stop by her school.”

“You want me to go? Are you sure the school officials—“

”Great! I already told the school you would be there in thirty minutes! Thanks a bunch darling!”

Click.

“What, what, what?!”

YuRa’s eager voice rang in my ears as she quickly began to pack up.

Where the hell does she think she’s going?!

“Where are you going HwangYuRa?”

Too busy putting away her pens and highlighters into her lacy pink pencil case, YuRa ignored my question. With the quickness, YuRa was finished packing by the time she looked up at me.

“Lets go.”

“Where do you think you’re going?”

YuRa’s tongue stuck out half way in a guilty manner.

“You’re going to NaRi’s school right? I want to go too! Cute high school boys! I love it! Take me! Actually, I’m going even if you don’t take me!”

Why is it that everyone in my life has to be completely screwy in the head?!

“HwangYuRa, stay here and study. This isn’t some picnic. NaRi got into trouble.”

“It’s okay! I’m pretty, so the principal and the teachers will like me. Don’t worry. Come on lets hurry up!”

YuRa dragged me out of my seat, out of the library, through campus, and eventually to the taxi stop. I’ve never seen such a fragile girl so violently grabbing a taxi. It was probably a really bad idea to take YuRa along, but then again, I wouldn’t have to deal with NaRi’s scary Vice Principal by myself.

As YuRa and I walked through the front field, a boy’s P.E. class stopped their game of soccer to whistle, yell out obscene comments, and ask for numbers. Princess YuRa of course had to encourage the raging hormones of the kids, and began to wave at the crowd as if she was just crowned Miss. Da.mn Korea.

Suddenly, a lean boy came running out from the crowd of sweaty high school boys. YuRa screeched in glee as she squinted her eyes to get a better look.

“Hwang YuRa, get a hold of yourself!”

“Oh BoHyung look, he’s so cute!”

I dragged a very unwilling YuRa away, but the boy just ran faster and faster.

“Noona! Noona!”

Why did I bring her?! Why! I know I’m stupid, but not this stupid! Who in the right mind takes a pedophile to a high school campus?! Oh yes, her name is SuhBoHyung, me.

“I think he’s talking to you BoHyung.”

I stopped to take a better look. It was the friend of KimJaeJoong and YooChun.

Does he have a name?

“Noona, you remember me right? I’m friends with YooChun.”

I nodded. The boy smiled brightly while stealing a quick glance at YuRa.

“BoHyung Noona…um…I was wondering…”

“Hey HwangYuRa meet um…yea meet this kid.”

“My name is—“

Before the boy could finish, the loud screaming of a man, probably the P.E. teacher, interrupted his introduction.

“JUNGYUNHO!”

Looking back at the red face of the fat P.E. teacher the kid began to quickly shuffle backwards.

”YuRa noona, can I see you some time?!”

YuRa’s slim fingers formed an “O.K.” sign, and the kid jumped up in joy and quickly ran back. I rolled my eyes as YuRa blushed brightly.

“I can’t believe I brought you along.”

”Wasn’t he cute BoHyung? He’s so much cuter than the kid I’m going out with right now. He’s nice and tall too!”

The whole way to the office, HwangYuRa’s rattling continued nonstop. I quickened my pace, and although the office was on the first floor, it seemed like YuRa’s boy talk continued forever…and ever…and ever.

I felt my heart sinking to the ground as soon as I quietly slid open the office door. YuRa eagerly looked over my shoulder and glanced around the silenced office. The first thing that caught my attention was an item Vice Principal Lee was holding in her hands. It was a single panel from a wooden crate. Across the panel were the words “fresh lettuce” in dirtied neon green lettering. As my eyes shifted, I saw NaRi with her head down, sitting across from Vice Principal Lee. Next to NaRi was a girl rolling an egg on her cheeks.

Oh God!
 

Tainted Memories of Issey Miyake // 30

Surviving a night of screaming and cursing from my mother, I wasn’t able to get a wince of sleep. It was a restless night, but it would be an even longer day. Cradling my trusty books, I laid my head down on the smooth surface hoping for a few minutes of sleep before class would start.

Before long, a soft poking interrupted my much needed rest. I groggily rubbed my eyes while slightly lifting my face to see whom the inconsiderate intruder was. I groaned out in dissatisfaction. Ignoring HeeJoo’s sharp pokes, I immediately turned back to my solid pillows.

“BoHyung, Mr. Jung is coming.”

I pulled my wrist up to my face, and peered at my watch. It had been twenty minutes since I had fallen asleep. I noticed HeeJoo’s slender finger pointing at an object in the right hand corner of my desk.

A small yellow carton.

“What the hell?”

Wondering if someone had mistaken my desk for ChilHyun’s, I tossed the carton of banana milk up and down in my hand. It was still cold.

“HeeJoo yah, who put this here?”

“Hyunnie.”

Banana milk wh.ore?! It can’t be.

“Really?”

HeeJoo nodded while continuing to highlight something in her history book. I swiveled around in my chair and stared down at the back of AnChilHyun’s hooded head. He was sleeping too.

If I drink this, AnChilHyun will probably demand six banana milks instead of five. So in that case, if I return it to him, he’ll only ask for four. So in the end instead of paying 2,500 won ($2.50) I’ll only have to pay 2,000 won ($2.00). Score!

I placed the carton of milk on the corner of his desk. Turning around I noticed HeeJoo glancing at the banana milk. She looked quite lost as she sat at her desk mindlessly staring at the carton of milk. Before I could ask if HeeJoo wanted it, the sliding door of the classroom burst open, and in walked in our homeroom teacher, Mr. Jung.

”Someone wake AnChilHyun!”

Seeing that I was closest to him, I assumed Mr. Jung was indirectly speaking to me. I turned around and flicked AnChilHyun on the head. Probably due to his thick hood, he didn’t stir, and Mr. Jung, along with the rest of the class, stared robotically at us. Not quite enjoying the attention, I angrily kicked at one of the desk legs. A loud gasp escaped from the classroom. I watched in horror while the desk leg broke off, and AnChilHyun’s sleeping body went crashing down to the ground.

OH MY GOD! TEN BANANA MILKS! HE’S GOING TO ASK FOR TEN!

“HYUNNIE YAH!”

The screeching of HeeJoo’s high pitched voice, forced me to pay attention to the commotion erupting around me. Since I was closest, I kneeled down next to AnChilHyun’s groaning body. There was pain written all over his face as he rolled into a ball while holding his knee to his chest.

“SuhBoHyung, go take him to the nurses office.”

”Me?!”

“Didn’t you break the desk leg, and isn’t that why AnChilHyun is shriveled up on the floor?!”

I didn’t do it on purpose! I mean I may have thought about it in the past, but this wasn’t done on purpose! It was an accident! A freak accident!

Far from being gentle, I grabbed AnChilHyun’s limp arm and helped him up. He held onto his stomach and limped out the classroom while leaning against my shoulder. As soon as the classroom door closed, AnChilHyun took a step away from me, and began heading for the staircase.

He’s not hurt!

“AnChilHyun!”

Not willing to get in trouble by being seen alone, I rushed after AnChilHyun’s disappearing back. Just as we exited the school building, I noticed the familiar banana milk being opened in his hand. If I wasn’t mistaken, it was the same one that I had left on the corner of his desk.

When the hell did he stick that in his pocket?!

“Why did you act like you were hurt when you weren’t! You made me look hel.la stupid!”

There was no reply, so I continued to follow him, and we were suddenly at the back alleyway of the school. The recent events that had erupted within the alley continued to bother me. I anxiously took a seat on a wooden crate that read “fresh lettuce” in bubbly green letters.

“Did you lose your voice along with the fall?!”

A smug look of satisfaction appeared on AnChilHyun’s face as he finished the milk and tossed the empty milk carton into a nearby dumpster. He began to pull off his vest and loosen his necktie.

“I needed a drink.”

ALL THIS SO THE PRI.CK COULD DRINK HIS DA.MN BANANA MILK, WHICH WAS ORIGINALLY MINE!

From the corner of my eyes, I noticed another banana milk being pulled out from AnChilHyun’s pant pocket.

Another one?! How many did he have?!

“Here you can have one too.”

THREE?!

I unexpectedly caught the banana milk suddenly being tossed at me. Without another word, I began to open up the milk. The unusually sweet milk smoothly went down my throat, and I for a minuscule second, I understood why AnChilHyun was so infatuated with the drink.

“Thanks…for yesterday.”

There was no way I was going to make eye contact with AnChilHyun. I placed my head on my knees and looked at the upside down at the words “fresh lettuce.” Even though I looked like I was trying to throw up, AnChilHyun continued to talk.

“I don’t really remember, but HeeJoo told me that you and HoHyung took me home.”

Yea, and now I have to organize HoHyung’s Ladies Bible because of you!

“I didn’t…I didn’t say anything weird right?”

Could AnChilHyun see my body ice over at the question? Did he notice the light jolt in my head? What do I say?

“AnChilHyun…you know—“

Rising at the sound of my voice, AnChilHyun began to head out of the alleyway.

”Let’s get back to class. Mr. Jung’s probably wondering where we went.”

Yeah…lets.